How to answer uncomfortable children's questions: recommendations, options

Do not know how to answer uncomfortable children's questions? Read the article, it contains recommendations and options.

Content

Probably, every parent, starting from about four years of his child, is faced with a problem "Prechiki". The flow of questions from an inquisitive child is quite normal for such an age, and in the future, in particular adolescence, it is also worth waiting for many very tricky and awkward manifestations of curiosity.

Read on our website another article on the topic: "How to love a child?". You will find 8 main tips, a description of errors and their corrections.

Due to the age of the child, the circumstances in which the family is located, and the own worldview of parents, serious problems may arise with answers to some of the children. We will tell you how to correctly answer uncomfortable children's questions. Read further.

Why do children ask uncomfortable questions to parents?

Children always ask uncomfortable questions to parents

In fact, the answer to the question of why children ask uncomfortable questions to parents is quite obvious. And who else?

Often, only parents are able to simply and clearly answer the child to the momentary urge of his curiosity.
Yes, a situation often arises when the question is not by time and not to place, but from that annoying.
However, it is unlikely that anyone will explain some important points to a child than a parent.
Neither dry facts from the Internet, which can not be clear to everyone, not the words of peers, shifted and re-re-re-fed, no other people can convey to the “why why, everything is as clear as their own mom and dad.
And no normal parent will want some stranger from the street to tell the child where the children come from.

The child grows and develops, and his curiosity appears and increases with him.

Everything around is new, interesting, the baby begins to realize himself, the world, his place in it, falls into society.
From here in the young mind many diverse questions are accumulating. From simple: "And what's that?" to extremely awkward, like "Where the babies come from?".
In adolescence, the range of questions changes due to one of the most difficult stages of the life of every person - puberty. But you should not be afraid of this terrible word.
Correctly establishing contact with the child at the early stages of growing up, in the future you can achieve complete understanding and trust.
Hence the answers, and in principle, raising such questions, will not be as awkward as it could be in the opposite situation.

It is worth knowing: Sometimes questions of children are at an impasse, annoy, interfere. However, the very fact that the baby asks this question to its parent speaks of how important he is for him. It is the mother and father as the ideal of all things, as an indisputable authority and the most valuable source of information.

Neither the Internet, nor other people, nor other materials, like magazines and newspapers. It is parents. Even if in the end they give out processed information from the Internet or from their own experience, the child appreciates exactly what they are responsible for him. He understands that his interest is not empty, they pay attention to him, and he means something in this life. This is the same reason why children ask uncomfortable questions to their parents.

How parents should correctly answer uncomfortable children's questions: Recommendations

Parents must correctly answer uncomfortable children's questions

The reasons for the address of the questions were sorted out to parents, however, to successfully repel the attack "Prechichki", It is also necessary to learn several important rules. So, how should parents answer inconvenient children's questions correctly? Accept the general recommendations:

You need to answer questions

In no case should the child’s uncomfortable questions be left unanswered. Firstly, this undermines the trust in the parent. The kid can feel unnecessary, unloved, can be offended. Secondly, the child can go and, most likely, will follow the answer to another source of information. Not always safe and accurate.

Answer in accordance with the age of the child

Do not clog the head of four -year -old crumbs with scientific terms and physical laws, and the teenager to feed phrases like "Air brings children". Everything has its time. It is important to choose the words so that the baby’s answer is either satisfied, or the question is completely exhausted. Otherwise, there will be failure and a feeling of incredited.

If possible, answer in affordable and briefly

No need to embark on long and tedious explanations with quoting wikipedia or another more difficult to perceive the source. The child most often needs the most short and understandable answer that will make him think a little, but will not overload the young head, who wants to switch to other, no less important things.

It is important to speak truthfully

That's what you should not do is lie to the baby. The consequences of lies will hurt the day after a day, two, and maybe several years. If suddenly a Chado finds out that the parent lied to him, the trust will be undermined, and it will not work to restore it with a truly chocolate or a concess. Of course, you should not speak very directly, especially in some aspects, but the words can be selected so that the child understands everything perfectly.

Do not be afraid to admit your incompetence

It is always necessary to remember that people are not robots and not a search engine. They know and understand something, something is not. It's quite normal. Therefore, you never need to be ashamed, but honestly admit that the answer is unknown. However, even such a situation can be wrapped in your favor. Or ask the baby to give a little time to search for an answer or offer to look for an answer together. The baby will always be pleased to go on an exciting adventure for answers to questions with dear parents. Even if the path does not go beyond the computer with the search engine and the first few links received after the request.

Answer without irritation

Even if the question of the crumbs was out of place, it is forbidden to tear off its indignation on an inquisitive crumb. Unfortunately, children do not fully understand this world, its conventions. They cannot know when to fit, and when not. They cannot climb into the head of their parents and understand them. Children are children. Over time, they will learn to feel the atmosphere, but until this time, parents are better off to show miracles of patience and understanding.

Do not taboo some topics

Questions about death, about intimacy, about the conception of children, about an undesirable pregnancy, about money and other serious topics, of course, give their parents the trouble, but do not make something forbidden to discuss from them. The forbidden fruit is sweet, and the lack of information in the crumbs can lead to extreme unpleasant consequences. In addition, the baby is literally interesting in this world and it will become even more interesting if he finds out that this is something wrong. After all, then the question is rightly arose: “Why wrong? Why can't you talk? ". As a result, new uncomfortable questions appear, which are even more difficult to answer.

Unknown questions - how to answer them: options

Uncomfortable questions - they need to answer them

Nevertheless, despite the presence of general recommendations, it is not always possible to get out of the question of the child’s question without any problems. Therefore, it is important to know how to formulate answers at least to the frequently encountered questions of small and big "Why". So how to answer them? Here are the options:

How and where do children come from?

The answer to this question should be given, based on the age at which the young interlocutor is located. It depends on how the answer will turn out to be. But it is worthwhile only to essentially, without loading the child with excess information, which he did not ask for. Something is quite suitable: “We fell in love with each other, got married and you appeared. You grew up in your mother’s tummy, and then born. ”

What is death and will I die?

Despite the seriousness and gloom of the raised topic, you should not get away from the answer or assure the child that there is no departure to another world. It is worth considering the fact that the child should ask this question on his own and the fear of this for children is a normal phenomenon. You can answer something like: “No matter how sad it is, all living creatures are very fragile. People are aging, sick and dying. But you should not constantly think about it and should not be afraid. Ahead of you has a long and happy life that dad and I will give you. ”

And what will happen to me when I die?

The baby can be answered in general terms. Older children give the opportunity to reflect on this together with adults. Since even wise adults cannot give an accurate answer to this question, this topic is an excellent field for thinking. A lot depends on the worldview and religiosity of the parents, so the answer should be based on these factors.

Who loves more?

A similar question is often caused by the child’s uncertainty, a lack of attention from one or both parents, a sense of his own uselessness. It is very important to answer that mom, dad, brother, sister, grandmother, grandfather and the baby are loved, but everyone in their own way. The fact that parents communicate differently with someone does not mean that love for this is stronger or weaker than for the questioner. It is important to say that love is different and manifests itself in different ways, that the child is loved in their own way.

Remember: Equaling with others will be insulting for the crumbs.

Is there really Santa Claus?

This is probably one of those cases when uncertainty is a way out. It all depends on whether the parent wants to create a New Year's fairy tale for the child or wants to show him reality. The correct answer does not exist here. It is best to either transfer his own opinion to the child, or answer that the answer is unknown for certain. " Perhaps it exists somewhere. The world is big. No one knows for sure. I'm thinking that ... " - The most suitable design for response and reflection.

Why do parents swear?

In this situation, it is important to explain that people do not always agree with each other and various kinds of quarrels arise from this. It is also worth remembering that the child, not understanding the essence of interpersonal conflicts and without delving into their reasons, can consider himself guilty of a quarrel. Therefore, you should convince him of the opposite and apologize.

Why does night come (it rains, you can’t walk on water, etc.)?

This is also one of those questions, the answer to which should be given depending on the age of the child. The adult will be quite known to the parent of the facts, but for the baby it will be much more interesting to find an answer with mom and dad.

Why do others have something that I do not have?

Do not immerse the child in the amount of parental salaries, utility bills, rising prices in the store and other details of adulthood. It is important to convey to the child that parents are trying for him so that they always have warm, light and satisfying, but all things in the world will not work. He has something, but others, and vice versa.

What is the difference between boys and girls?

You should not bring the already established stereotypes about the floors and their place in this world, as a type: by type: "Boys never cry", "Girls play only dolls" and so on. It is necessary to convey to the child that both boys and girls experience similar emotions, but react to them differently. Already in more adulthood, you can slightly affect the features of physiology and its details.

Why can't you talk with strangers on the street?

In this situation, it is important to convey to the crumbs that not all people are good. Someone wants to hurt them, offend, do something bad. The understanding that a smile on the face of a stranger can be false, and a mythical kitten is just an excuse to take him to himself, can protect the baby from danger. How a good option is to tell the child that in case of such conversations with strangers, it is always worth going to parents or call them. It is forbidden to go somewhere with unfamiliar uncles or aunts, even if they claim that they will take the baby to dad and mom, or give something.

What is sex?

It is difficult, embarrassed and, according to the majority, it is wrong. But if the child is not a baby at all, then it is better to tell everything directly than to wait when the child learns everything on his own. In the best case, this will be done at school, and in the worst - among other children, where a lot of unpleasant things can happen to the child. Still, many tend to show in practice, and from the lack of education they often think that there is nothing wrong with their actions.

What is a divorce?

For a child in this difficult situation, it is important to know that he is not abandoned, that he was not out of loving. Therefore, it is important to explain the situation as it is, but at the same time in general terms. Do not delve into the details of the parental conflict, other participants. It is necessary to explain to the baby that mom and dad no longer want to live together, for certain reasons, be sure to reveal the reasons and assure that he will see both parents, and they will still love him.

Am I reception?

Human languages \u200b\u200bdo not know mercy even with respect to young children. Often, coming from a kindergarten or school, the child sets his parents really unpleasant and in some way even a terrible question. However, you should not be scared and outraged, pouring a negative on a child. Similar rumors in people's circles will walk regardless of the well -being of the family. Some sometimes just need to gossip and go into the details of the genetic code of a particular family do not want to. Therefore, the parental question should calmly explain to the baby that this is not true that he looks like his mom and dad. Give the arguments based on external and internal resemblance. In the case of the features inherited from older relatives, it is worth demonstrating them to the child. For example: “You see, you, like your grandmother, have red hair. I went to my dad, and dad went to my parents. Therefore, you have red hair ". It is important to convince the baby that he is a member of the family, otherwise, doubts and anxiety will bother him for a long time.

In conclusion, I would like to note that being a parent is work. Heavy, painstaking, sometimes unpleasant, unbearable, fascinating, seemingly light, but labor. Growing a worthy person is very difficult and important to remember that the foundations are laid precisely in childhood. The answers to numerous questions form that important connection between children and their parents, from which trust, mutual understanding and respect are formed. Therefore, it is forbidden to dismiss a child. Do not let him feel abandoned, unnecessary and unloved. Yes, it is difficult to always answer questions correctly, but if each parent tries to do this, then loving caring children and responsible citizens will probably grow up from him. Good luck!