Acquaintance with the parents of a guy and a girl: tips. How to please the parents of a guy and a girl on a first date?

So there is time to get acquainted with the parents of the guy and the girl. This is a very crucial moment, because the first impression of a person often forms a further attitude towards him.

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We offer advice on how to behave, what to give and what to talk about at a meeting and acquaintance with parents.

Acquaintance with the parents of the guy: tips

So, you are meeting with the guy for quite a long time, you are already outlined plans for further life, and the time comes for Dating with parents. We will not consider the situation when you were familiar with his parents before, for example, as classmates, classmates at the university, just friends.

Consider the case when this is the first acquaintance with the guy’s parents. Rarely such meetings take place in a cafe, on neutral territory. Still, the domestic mentality most likely involves a meeting in a home environment. What rules should be observed, what can be done and what can not categorically?

The main thing - follow the rule of the middle ground. That is, behave politely, follow the etiquette, speak the topics pleasant for interlocutors, but do not try to portray something unusual for you, be yourself. In any case, try to avoid “slippery” topics, such as politics, religion, etc.
False is always unpleasant For the interlocutor, so do not pull on yourself someone's image, do not try to seem unnecessarily relaxed, thus hiding the excitement, but do not pinch your emotions.
Try to listen moreWhat to say, do not ask the tone of the conversation, but answer questions clearly, clearly, and if you ask you to tell about yourself, tell us the most important thing, without going into details.
For dating with parents Dress modestly, but elegant. Avoid both supermodic exclusive things, and a biased sweater or blouse - familiar and beloved, but not suitable for guests. Let the makeup be unobtrusive and not striking.
If the acquaintance takes place during dinner or tea drinking, follow the usual table etiquette, do not refuse treats, praise the food, only sincerely, not stretched.
It is better to drink alcohol to a minimum. A glass of light wine in the evening is quite acceptable, no longer stands. It is better to refuse strong alcohol.
Even if you smoke, and his parents invite you to join, it’s better politely refuse. A smoking girl almost always causes a negative attitude to herself.
Do not stay visiting for too long, let the first introductory visit be short.

Based on the results of this visit, make a decision to invite a guy to get to know your parents, as well as acquaintance of your parents.

What to give the guy to the guy when meeting?

It is customary to visit a gift with a gift, no one canceled this rule. And what is a gift to the guy’s parents when acquainting will be the best?

With regard to gifts, the same rule is valid as during behavior during acquaintance - adhere to the golden middle.
They will be inappropriate both expensive offerings and cheap trinkets from a market shop. If the acquaintance is dedicated to the holiday - the New Year, Easter, Birthday, the gift can be more expensive, and if the acquaintance goes by itself, then more modest.

Here are some tips, regarding the fact that it is not worth giving when meeting parents:

Cosmetics and perfumes -Firstly, this is an expensive gift (you are not going to give cheapness), and secondly, you can hardly guess the taste.
Clothing items and, especially, linen - It is customary to give such things only to very close people.
This also includes jewelry, For the same reasons.
Even if you Professional cook or confectioner, Do not come to get acquainted with his parents with the fruits of your work - a corporate dish or a cake. The mistress of the house may be offended by you, because this is a disrespect for her work
In no case do not give pet! In an exceptional case, this can be done if you know for sure (from your boyfriend, for example) that they want, say, a British Visloux kitten of a certain gender and suit, and you have one in mind.
Money in the envelope - everything is clear without clarification.

Now about the fact that you can give the guy to the guy at the first acquaintance:

You can give a book, even better the album of reproductions, but before that, be sure to ask the guy if his parents will be happy with such a gift, and what topic you can choose on.
Small figurine or vase Also suitable, just avoid Kitch!
Live flowers in a pot will be good, best, do not require troublesome care.
If there are kids in the house, be sure to grab them for them treats (which they can be better than fruits), or small toys.
You can also give a certificate to visit some interesting institution, tickets to the theater, cinema, etc.

If your gift is chosen with love, meets the requirements of etiquette, then do not hesitate, it will be accepted with gratitude!

Questions to the guy's parents when meeting

On the one hand, all rules claim that it is better not to ask questions, but to listen and answer, on the other hand, according to the rules of good tone, it is indecent not to be at all interested in the life of your boyfriend's family. So, what is possible and what cannot be asked when acquaintance with parents?

You can’t dig too deep. Inappropriate questions will be about the material situation of the parents, their work and the like.
In general, avoid those about finances, politics and religion, This is a taboo of any dialogue of unfamiliar people.
However, if they, say, love to travel, there is nothing shameful, ask, about a trip, a country where they were recently, this is a completely natural desire.
Questions will be very approvingly About the childhood and youth of your chosen one, Parents are very pleased with their son.

What to talk about with the mother of the groom?

At the beginning of the acquaintance, it is appropriate to ask how to contact a guy's parents. More conservatives want them to be called by name and patronymic, more modern will prefer an appeal by name, the third generally like home treatment by uncle and aunt. This question needs to be asked unobtrusively, not offering your form: "Oh, but you can call you this way." This is a big mistake.

If you see that communication does not cause negative emotions among his parents, and the conversation is alive and laid -back, then after you tell me where and how you met their son, you can unobtrusively ask: “Oh, and you met, tell me, tell , please!"
In the end, try more answer than ask, But show your interest.

What to say when meeting a guy's parents?

So, what you can ask, we figured it out, and now we'll see what it is possible and necessary, and what the girl cannot be told in response to the questions of his parents. So, acquaintance with the guy’s parents, tips for girls.

As we have already noted, the initiative of the conversation should come from the elders. You will be asked obvious and implicit questions, ask you to tell about yourself, your family, study (work), hobbies. What can be opened for them, and what is better not to spread about yet?

Your family. First of all, no negativity! About the difficulties in relationships, misunderstanding, quarrels, it is better at the first meeting, and then not to speak. Tell us about some good moments. Remember, dad and mother of your boyfriend first of all parentsAnd therefore, it will be unpleasant for them if they talk about the same parents like them.
Studies. If you are studying at the university, technical school, school, also avoid negativity. In a nutshell, tell us about the future profession, about further plans.
Work. Also try to talk about good. If you don’t like the work, just say that you have not found a suitable one yet, and work temporarily. Do not discuss the question of salary, say something like: "The salary is not bad, but I would like better." The exact amount can be discussed only when you are planning a wedding, cohabitation with his parents and a common budget.
Hobbies. If you have an interesting hobby, Tell us in detail about him, provided that his parents will be interested. If you see that they don’t really like your hobby, change the topic of conversation.
The same applies religions and politicians. Your views may not coincide, and when meeting it will play against you. It is better to ask your chosen one in advance about the tastes and preferences of his parents, so as not to get into trouble

In no case do not talk about your diseases! This is a closed topic.

In general, the universal council is as Talk about yourself honestly, openly, but keep the distance, your future relatives should not know everything.

Acquaintance with parents: how to behave to a girl?

In general, we have already figured out how behave a girl when meeting a guy's parents. Now, for consolidation, several general tips on how the guy’s parents are being acquainted according to the best scenario.

Accept the remarkable aphorism into service: “Be yourself, but prepare your best version for acquaintance!” This statement very accurately reflects all the nuances!
Try to produce a favorable impression It is his mother. Remember, mother Apriori is configured against any daughter -in -law, so if you manage to like it, then it will be just wonderful!

It is important to make a good impression on mom

It may be easier for you with his dad, the fathers of the guys are more loyal to the girls of their son. Communicate with him easily, fun, at ease. Just don't try to flirt! Even if his wife does not give a look, her attitude towards you will sharply worsen.
A very subtle moment. If in a conversation his mother constantly talks about how good he is and how she loves him, you don’t have to catch the topic all the time, turning her to herself: “Oh, yes, I love him very much. He is wonderful, I see it. He is so sensitive, treats me great! " Understand, now mom talks about her love for her son, she does not really want to hear the recognition of another woman.
Also, recognizing the achievements of the guy in work, unobtrusively conduct the idea that you will also achieve success, that do not intend to sit on his neck. As it will be there, it doesn’t matter, but now it will make a favorable impression.
At the same time, try to convey to his mother the idea that her son is for you hope and support, And you will always support it. How to convey, see the nature of the conversation.

What to wear for acquaintance with the guy's parents?

As they say, the first acquaintance cannot be repeated, and the first impression is corrected. And the principle of "meeting by clothing" has not yet been canceled. Therefore, it is very important to follow the rules of acquaintance with the guy's parents , regarding how to dress.

Here are a few important tips, or step -by -step instructions for appearance to get acquainted with the parents of your boyfriend:

In advance, no later than a week before the alleged meeting, learn more about his parents, their character and habits:

Do they adhere to conservative or modern views?
Do you prefer bohemian or classic style?
Do they have strict or soft characters?
Will the evening take place in a formal or home environment?
What in the clothes of girls they categorically do not accept?
Do they have allergies to certain aromas of spirits or deodorant?

In any case, regardless of these points, do not put on:

Tracking dresses
Too deep neckline
Very short dresses or skirts
Long cuts to thigh
Too tight dresses

Selected clothes a few hours before the meeting check if there is spotsIs she good poster, is it combined with shoes and jewelry - you can not do all this at the last moment.
Think well makeup. In any case, it is better to “get undercut” than to overdo it. Even the most advanced, bohemian parents will not appreciate the bright, causing makeup in sharp colors.
A very important component of your appearance - hair. They must be carefully washed, combed, laid. Avoid elaborate hairstyles, it is better to make a discreet styling on the principle of "simple, but with taste."
Gold jewelry and jewelry In general, use very carefully. Too expensive jewelry can take for a lack of taste or for a desire to abandon their wealth. Enough everyday ring, discreet, but elegant earrings, a small necklace.
Choose shoes in a small heel, beautiful, but not causing, Without huge studs and superetolist platform.
It is better not to wear new, unusual, but to choose comfortable clothes in which you habitual and comfortable.

Acquaintance with the parents of the girl: tips

At some point in your meetings, your girlfriend will say that her parents insist on meeting a guy , with whom she meets, that is, with you.
Now you have a very important event for a further relationship - Acquaintance with the parents of the girl. This, on the one hand, is a responsible and difficult matter, and on the other, necessary and quite natural.
Even if you only meet, and do not build plans for life together, her parents will definitely want to get acquainted with the person with whom the daughter spends so much time. Of course, the determining moment will be your attitude towards their daughter, But your not the last role in the acquaintance will play your appearance, behavior, ability to behave and other qualities.

What to talk about? — What to talk about and how to behave?

Here is a general program of behavior when meeting her parents:

Be sure to do it preparation. Ask the girl, let her tell about her parents in a nutshell, what they are interested in what their views are on life. This will help you when talking with them.
If you want to say hello to you, answer in moderation strong handshake, wherein look into your eyes, smile. Do not pull the hand first, the initiative should come from the elders. With her mother, you can also say hello to the hand if she extends her to you. Kissing her hand is unlikely to be appropriate.
For the first meeting dress neutral Do not fall to the extremes from a three-piece costume and a stained shirt to a holey jeans and a wiped T-shirt. Let the clothes be ordinary, not throwing, but clean and tidy.
A small gift will be useful - bouquet of flowers, a bottle of good wine or something similar.
Follow etiquette not only in the conversation, but also in gestures, in the position of the body. Gestures should be moderate, posture even, no waggers and elbows on the table!
After dinner, offer your help: Remove (especially if it is a picnic in the open air), capture a bag of garbage. Perhaps they will refuse your help, but they will remember a beautiful gesture.

What to give the girl’s parents at the first acquaintance?

When meeting with parents of a girl, a gift can be more expensivethan her gift to your parents. Still, it is not a sin to show his level of prosperity to a man. But at the same time, you still need to know the measure - too expensive gifts can be perceived ambiguously.
Follow also the correspondence of the price of the gift and your appearance. Too simple clothes do not harmonize with expensive offering. Again, if you have a simple meeting in a home environment with tea or a modest dinner, you should not make expensive gifts.
Better to give something exclusive, original, but not too expensive. This will show not only your taste, but also attention to the girl’s parents: you didn’t just go to the store and bought, but tried, chose, showed care.

So, give gifts to her mother:

Anyway - flowers. Bouquet, or flowers in a pot. Suitable orchids, lilies, roses Light shades, but not red. It is better to ask your girlfriend what flowers her mother loves. Such intelligence should be carried out on gifts to mom and dad.
Mom can be presented elegant figurine, wall picture, casket - Products made of wood are always pleasing to the eye.
Instead of banal sweets, you can bring some exotic tea or the same coffee.
Having learned her taste, you can take a chance to give something for her hobbies: special knitting wool, embroidery set, etc.

Gifts Girls:

Good alcoholonly if he is his connoisseur. But this is an expensive gift, it is better to save it for a holiday.
A lover of cigars can present a good havanaBut this is not a frequent option.
The connoisseur of cars can be presented retro car model, They are not very expensive, and look excellent.
Very good as a gift authorus some famous brand.

Questions when meeting a girl's parents

When meeting with the parents of the girl There will be a lot of questions. There are not only more in quantity, but they are more “meticulous”, deep. In principle, this is understandable. More volitional qualities are required from a man, making more responsible decisions, and a career and financial situation for them are of paramount importance in the family.

So, get ready for the following issues:

About study - Where are you learning who you will become after studying, where you plan to work, whether you like the chosen profession. These are very important questions, and her parents want to know the answers to them, so try to explain it clearly and clearly.
About work - Where and by whom you work, do you earn good, whether you like work, are you going to change it, what are your career prospects. Here you also need to give clear answers, but the size of the salary can not be specified. The answer will be optimal like: "I earn normally, I have enough for life, I also put it off a little."
About hobbies - Tell us about them so that her parents see an interesting personality, and not a simple consumer of material goods.
Avoid those politics and religion. Only if you know exactly the political or religious beliefs of her parents can you answer these questions. But it’s better to avoid these topics.

Usually, the elders ask questions, but you can also ask about some things so as not to seem indifferent:

Absolutely win -win topic - Your girlfriend’s childhood: how she studied, what she was fond of, how she rested. Parents will be pleased to tell about their daughter, and you will receive valuable information.
Having learned in advance the preferences of her parents, you can ask how her mother liked the last series of the film, and her father-how he regards the game of such and such a team. However, it is worth doing this only if you yourself are interested in it yourself, and you are rooting for the same team, etc., otherwise it will look very false.
You can tell How did you meet a girl (Even if she already shared this story with her parents, they will still be interested to hear your version), and you can ask parents how they met.

Rules of etiquette when meeting with parents of a girl

If you were invited to get to know your girlfriend’s parents, you need to adhere to ordinary etiquette rules:

Come to the indicated hour not earlier and in any case no later. The interval of 15 minutes is allowed. in any direction.
Entering the apartment, politely say helloBut do not give your hand the first, the elders should do it.
Clearly name your name In the form in which you want to be addressed to you: Ivan Petrovich, Ivan, or just Vanya.
To her parents also contact the way they were introduced -By name-patronymic, a complete or short name, or a home aunt/uncle. Do not be shy if, for example, her mother introduced herself as Marina and call her, women often do not like patronymic, making them solid and too adults.
You must come in neat clothes, neat, not extravagant, not causing.
Of course , the hair is washed, the nails are cleaned and trimmed, socks without holes.
Do not show too many initiative, wait for you to be asked.
Hide the phone and turn off the sound. In extreme cases, if you wait for an important call, warn in advance that they can call, for example, from work, and you can’t answer.
During conversation adhere to common topicsAvoid sharp assessments and judgments - her parents can be adherents of the values \u200b\u200bthat you condemn.
Do not delay your visit, do not insist that the girl leaves with you, perhaps she wants to talk with her parents, find out their opinion about you.

As you can see, nothing unusual is required from you. Follow the usual rules of etiquette, and everything will be fine!

How to please the parents of the guy and the girl at the first acquaintance?

The most basic - remember that first acquaintance with parents There may only be one. And the first impression will be delayed in the memory of his/her parents is stronger than all subsequent ones.

We offer a few simple tips on how to appeal to his/her parents when meeting. For girl:

Speak only good about him. Even if he has flaws, they do not need to flaunt them - his parents know about it without you.
In no case do not be late! This can be a fatal mistake. Polite people will not express this, but they will have an unpleasant display.
Do not use slang words if possible, do not laugh too loudly, do not expose yourself as the main character at the meeting
In no case do not smoke In the presence of his parents at the first meeting, even if they smoke! Adults are unambiguously negative about smoking girls. If you can’t get rid of this bad habit, open it later when you will be loved for other qualities.
Better stay too modest than too cheeky.
Dress the first meeting not defiantly, but stylishly, this will make a favorable impression.
Follow the elementary rules of politeness: "Thank you", "Please", "Let me help you" - These words "+" in your piggy bank.
Do not lean on alcohol. Refrain at all, or limit yourself to a glass of dry wine.
Be restrained, do not argue for every reason, better smile sweetly and translate the conversation on another topic.

Do not caress too clearly with your boyfriend in front of your parents, leave kisses and stroking for a more intimate environment.
Be sure to know your boyfriend about what they are fond of His parents, but what topics it is better not to speak with them.
Do not boast of your material or career achievements, Especially if this is the merit of your parents. Modestly mention that you are firmly standing on your feet, you have a good job.
Do not advise anything to his mother! Even if it is a useful and desired advice. No potential mother -in -law will tolerate such an intervention on its territory

For a guy, you can recommend the same rules of good tone, but adjusted to his masculine character. The guy should be more confident in himself, independent, solid, decisive.

What to do if parents did not like when meeting?

First of all, do not despair! Do not run away with a cry: "Everything is gone!" Do not fall into depression. Do not think about the breakdown of the relationship. First of all, you need to find out the most important question: does your half support you or include your parents? Now you need to try to understand, did you not like it specifically, or are they generally against the serious relationship of their child with someone in principle?

If parents did not work out, talk to the guy

Carefully analyze that You did wrong when meeting your parents, Where were you mistaken in the manner of behavior, in a conversation, in clothes?

If your boyfriend/your girlfriend supports you, sit down and calmly, without emotions, talk, disassemble the situation on the bones, find out that you did not do the same.
Remember that any of your misses at the first acquaintance it is difficult to fix, but possible.
Now you will have to very carefully, gradually, gradually prove to them that you are not at all, but behaved badly because of excitement, stress, for another reason.
In the case when your parents are not against you specifically, but against a serious relationship in general, just continue love and protect each other, With all your behavior proving your right to a serious relationship
If your half is inclined to the opinion of your parents, it will be doubly difficult for you to prove your case. Apply all your strength and skills to this, but to a certain limit. If you see that your boyfriend hears his mother more and sees you with her eyes, it is better to part before the start of life, it is incorrigible.
The same goes for the situation if you are a guy and did not like the parents of your girlfriend. These tips are obvious and simple. We hope that they will help you in these difficult situations!

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