11 main mistakes of parents who can destroy the fate of the child

11 main mistakes of parents who can destroy the fate of the child

Having matured, most of us are trying to shift the blame for our mistakes and failures on parents and their unreasonable methods of education. Often this is true, because at an early age we have a look at the world around us and our own attitude to the problems that arise.

Read on our website another article on the topic: "6 important and useful tips for parents: boys, girls".

There are main complexes laid down in childhood and able to influence the future fate of the child. What 11 main mistakes do parents make? More details are described in this article. Read further.

What mistakes do parents make who can destroy the fate of the child?

Mistakes of parents who can destroy the fate of the child
Mistakes of parents who can destroy the fate of the child

Many parents do not even think when raising the baby that they do something wrong and somehow they do this. Then this is poured into the complexes of an adult grown child. Because of this, a person suffers and begins to blame his parents, surrounding people and the whole world around. However, everything starts with the family. Dad and mom should be wise and do the right thing so as not to harm the psyche of his child.

So, what mistakes can parents make who can destroy the fate of the child? We will reveal the most basic problems in education. Read further.

Hyperopeca: the main mistake of parents in education

If you overdo it, then the love of parents can become suffocating. Subsequently, if the child was surrounded by such care in childhood, he will certainly want to express dissatisfaction with such an attitude towards himself, and he will want to free himself as quickly as possible from control from his parents. Therefore, hyperopeca is bad and one of the most basic mistakes of parents in the upbringing of both girls and boys.

It is noteworthy that the final of such stories is the same: contrary to all the advice and punishments of the parents, their matured child marry with the first oncoming girl, enters into suspicious entrepreneurial transactions, falls under the influence of a bad company, misses classes in an educational institution, finds no results, does not bring results, And his life is gradually going on inclined. After a while, completely disappointed in himself and in the upbringing of parents, a person excludes relationships with loved ones or suffers from these thoughts.

Fulfillment of all whims: mistakes of parents of schoolchildren

Many parents, especially who are still small children - school age, are ready for anything to make their child happy. They indulge all his “Wishlists” - from the acquisition of an expensive toy, sometimes not even possessing free cash for this, to the plant of the pet, the subsequent care of which they have to carry out themselves. The performance of all whims is a common mistake by parents.

Little children - small requests, big children - big requests! Growing up, the baby habitually voices his new desires to parents, in the hope that they will certainly fulfill them. Only presenting a new car or cherished square meters is already much more difficult to give an adult to the adult son than to make it in childhood. A person brought up on the immediate execution of his “Wishlist” will constantly continue to wait and demand anything from others. He does not even try to start going to his dreams on his own, because his parents spoiled him in childhood and did not teach him to achieve their goals.

The child should not know the problems: a typical mistake of modern parents

On the one hand, you can understand the parents trying to protect the child from external problems and educate him in their own ideal world, thereby providing him with a carefree childhood. The reverse side of the coin is that, if you overdo it, then for the future of the child it is impossible to be calm. After all, excessive custody of external problems will certainly affect his awareness of the world. This is a typical mistake of modern parents.

If from childhood a person was protecting from all negative, domestic conflicts and problems, then in a future life it will be very difficult for him to get used to reality. Such a child, as a rule, grows into a person who will be subjected to the deepest stress and emotional disorders due to any unpleasant situation.

Lack of praise: parents' mistake in communicating with children

Lack of praise: parents' mistake in communicating with children
Lack of praise: parents' mistake in communicating with children

There are people who believe that frequent praise can grow a loan from a child and deprive him of a wonderful future life. The children of such parents are deprived of all praise in their address, regardless of their achievements, whether it is excellent assessments in school subjects in half a year, a well-deserved victory in the readers' competition, or a rather high score in the examination test. The lack of praise is also bad, and it is also a mistake by parents in communicating with children.

A person learns to evaluate himself and his achievements from early childhood, so a child who was always compared with others and did not evaluate his merits grows up with complexes. He will explain his achievements with success, at the same time suffer from doubts about himself and his own skills and zealously try to achieve respect from parents and other people around

Excessive abundance: a typical mistake of parents in raising children

Many parents are of the opinion that their child should not give a reason for boredom and try to entertain him with a large number of toys, classes, hobbies, provide different gadgets. As a result of such excessive abundance - the child grabs a few things at once, regularly switching from one to another, not realizing what he likes to do at the moment more. The typical mistake of parents in raising children is to give everything at once.

Having matured, this person will face difficulties in making his own decisions, will constantly doubt what exactly he needs, for what he needs, and it will be difficult to bring the work he had begun to the end. In addition, a person who in childhood has lost the opportunity to be alone with himself (without a TV, gadgets), alone in life often misses. It does not reach him what kind of lesson to choose, he will always wait for someone who will appear in his life and will be able to entertain.

Praise without measure: the main mistakes of parents in family education

Leave completely without praise and do it constantly - two mistakes that should be excluded in the educational process. Excessive non -constructive parental praise without a childhood, characterizing the child as the most irresistible and beautiful, in adulthood can lead to deep disappointment in others and in himself. Remember this main mistake by parents in family education.

It may happen that your son or daughter, friends or leader, are not going to praise and make compliments undeservedly. A person will subsequently be offended by everyone, realizing that no one except himself notices his merits.

An unreasonable approach to independence skills: Pedagogical errors of parents

Independence is a skill, which should be accustomed to early childhood, but most parents put it off for a later period, believing that, having matured, he himself will become responsible. However, such an unreasonable approach and improper upbringing leads to the fact that, having become an adult, a person is inclined to make other people guilty of all his failures. This is the pedagogical error of parents.

As a result, a career does not develop, since the boss is an idiot. A friend decided to part because she demanded the impossible. The university’s entrance tests did not pass - bureaucratic wires were to blame. Such a person will come up with an excuse for everything, if only not to exercise control over the situation.

Perfectionism: Frequent parents' mistake

Perfectionism: Frequent parents' mistake
Perfectionism: Frequent parents' mistake

In some cases, out of pure motives, parents stubbornly instill perfectionism in the child, not realizing what this can turn into further life. Do not allow such a frequent mistake of your parents.

Perfectionists are distinguished by the fact that they constantly strive for non -partial goals, and, as a result, are rarely satisfied with themselves. They hardly build a career, relations with those around them are also not easy. They strive in all in leading, in vain spending a lot of effort and time, but they do not achieve goals.

Distrust of others: one of the widespread errors of parents

Hearing often in childhood: “Nobody needs you, except for dad with mom,” in the future, a person is not eager to acquire friends, trust people and build relationships. He does not trust others and will not learn to do this in adulthood, if you do not explain everything to the child in childhood correctly.

Often, parents, protecting their child from relatives, educators and teachers, inspire him with confidence that only they are those only people who will always value and love him. This is one of the common mistakes of parents. As a result, it turns out that this person, who was always said that he does not need anyone, will not appreciate any other relationships, preferring only communication with his parents.

Indulgence of selfishness: a typical mistake of young parents in child-child relationships

Oddly enough, incommensurable care and love can become the main reason that a personality can grow from your beloved crumbs, persistently putting its interests and needs more important than the rest. This leads to indulgence of egoism in childhood. This is a typical mistake of young parents in child-family relationships.

Such a person will not touch the feelings and experiences of others. He will refuse to help and achieve the fulfillment of his desires in any way, recalling that in childhood he was not refused anything.

Control without measure: parents' error in wrong priorities

A person, devoid of personal space and personal things, as well as the possibility of staying without parental supervision, having matured, he will strive to make up for this at all costs. It is possible that he will drink alcoholic beverages, smoke, will change the girls like gloves, abandon their studies and will become what his parents, of course, did not dream of.

Control without measure is bad. Do not make the mistakes of other parents - teach the child to prioritize and make independent decisions. Any person who has sensed complete freedom only after adulthood, unreasonably approaches its understanding. As a result, he makes many mistakes, which will then be very difficult to fix.

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