Can there be a lot of parents' love: learn to say no. What is the love of parents for children?

The love of parents for children can harm. Although mom and dad often do not think so. Read more in the article on what the wise parent should act.

As parents and adults, we constantly worry about the correct amount of love, affection and attention that we show to our children. According to the old school of education, excessive love can ruin the child. But is it? Can parents have a lot of love? Look for the answer to these questions below.

Parents bring up love for children - the reason: a lack of time for a parent for a child

A number of psychologists around the world agree that attachment in itself does not harm the child. Most likely, on the contrary, love and affection are necessary so that the child grows up a happy and confident person. So at what point is love and affection, which cannot be measured as such, can become too strong and begin to have the opposite, negative effect on the child? The answer is how the affection is expressed and what it consists of.

• In today's world, where we are all constantly in motion and are busy with a whole pile of problems, satisfying the emotional needs of the child can become tedious for parents.
• Due to the excessive employment of parents, their inaccessibility during the week, they tend to concentrate more on the child for a short time that they are allotted.
• Sometimes this attention can be excessive, as parents sometimes feel guilty due to the fact that they are not near the children during the day.
• Adults agree with all the requirements and whims of a child as a method of compensation for their physical absence nearby.

Parents can go for it so that the child has pleasant memories of the time spent with them. Since children are often considered as a narcissistic continuation of themselves, parents sometimes indulge them with things, which they themselves were deprived in childhood. This type of attachment can be harmful.

Learn to say no "to children: the love of parents is manifested not only in the delights

Unconditional consent with any request of the child is already the problem of parents. You need to pay attention to what requirements are satisfied, and are they important for the growth and development of the child? Or you are in the most naive way to inspire him that he can get everything he wants. Immediately, without delay, if he asks enough intrusively. Learn to speak "NO" children. After all, love is manifested not only in concessions.

• Children as a soft clay that need to be formed, and our duty is to force them to learn something.
• Parents can say, "No."
• Having done this, you do not turn into villains for the child.
• Rather, this is only the first experience of disappointment, which will subsequently help him be more tolerant of failures.

Also, attachment and attention in the corresponding volume should be expressed depending on the life situation in which the child is located.

Remember: If your baby will always meet with the same adult reaction, it may be difficult for him later. He will not be able to adapt to the moments when he does not receive the usual attention.

Also, parents may not be able to provide their child with attention for objective reasons. When this happens, the child can be upset and angry. In the future, he can try to attract the lack of attention through inappropriate behavior.

A portrait of an overly loving parent: what is the love of parents for children, can there be a lot of it?

Such parents have two main fears:

1. That their child will lose motivation and give up
2. Or, conversely, will throw a hysteria

Adults are often worried that their children are subjected to any discomfort in everyday life. This is a portrait of an overly loving parent. What is the love of such parents for children, can there be a lot of it? Here's the answer:

• Parents are constantly worried that their child will not feel good enough.
• They seek to develop his self -esteem.
• They undermine the development of his skills of coping with stress.

Children who have grown up with such dad and mother become uncertain, they are simply afraid to live.

How do children develop the skills of overcoming difficulties: why does a loving parent step aside?

Those dealing with difficulties, and we are not talking about artificial problems created by parents, but about real abrasals.

• They may happen when a child was set a lot of homework, and he does not have time to prepare normally, for example, due to football training.
• This can happen in the presence of a bunch of household chores that he did not, because he played video games.
• The same can be said if the child violates discipline at school and now should face unpleasant consequences.

So how do children develop the skills of overcoming difficulties? Why should a loving parent sometimes step aside? Here's the answer:

• When the child is in distress due to the fact that he has too much homework, the parent’s task is to help the child plan his time.
• He must have time to fulfill the same tasks as other classmates with similar inclinations.
• If the child violates discipline at school, the parent’s work is to help him learn lessons from this experience.
• No need to save him from the need to pay for the consequences.

For example, when an excessively guardian parent feels that his child experiences stress due to a large amount of homework, he goes to complain to school and demands to reduce the load. It also happens that mom or dad performs homework for a child.

It is worth knowing:In some cases, teachers and schools are overgrown with load. But in general, children have a lot of homework, because they need to learn everything.

Therefore, if you can’t advise something or you did not have enough time for this, then just step aside. Give him the opportunity to cope with his own affairs. Believe me, he will find a way out of the situation. After all, a feature, any living being is to adapt to certain situations. As a result, such a child in adulthood will be much easier.

Important: Today, great demand from children. But life requirements are so great that you have to compete not only with their peers, but with the whole world.

The guardian parent understands this, but in every possible way tries to unnecessarily protect his child from the pressure of life. In the same way, when the children of these parents are capricious and rolling hysteria, they try to protect the kids from stress in every way in the hope that the tantrums will stop.

Remember: The absence of violent sobs does not mean that the child has better learned to cope with difficulties.

The theme of the love of parents for children is eternal: what can be done so that love does not harm the child?

We must pay attention to the needs of our children. They cannot fully develop without it. However, this can lead to the reverse results if we do not establish restrictions. The theme of the love of parents for children is eternal, since this is the most sacred that is in the world. But what can be done so that love does not harm the child?

In order to provide the baby with holistic development, it is important to draw the boundaries:

• You can provide him with everything that he wants and needs.
• But use the same technique to teach its responsibility.
• For example, you can allow the child to watch TV, but not long and not when he needs to prepare for an exam or control.
• In the same way, give your baby a gadget, but control how and how much he will use it.

The key point is the motivation for the ban. It is important not just to say no, but to explain why. It is worth noting that the prevention of one should not be accompanied by other bonds as compensation.

Children should grow in the care and love of parents: tips

Focus on complex ways to express your affection. Here are the tips that will help to grow children in care and love:

• When the children succeed, reward them. You can use a reward as a way by which a child can achieve even greater success.
• A good idea is to reward children for outstanding achievements, but with the help of things that help to achieve even greater superiority in a particular area.
• Awarding may not always be material. After all, a good assessment or victory in the race is pleasant on their own.
• The gratitude, hug and a sense of pride reported to the child are optimal forms of attachment for such cases.

Too much involvement in parents is associated with an increased level of anxiety. This may also be associated with a high probability of depression development and a decrease in general satisfaction of life in children. Therefore, keep in mind the following tips:

• Let the children do different work on their own.
• Do not try to be more than a friend more.
• Set the boundaries for children.
• Do not do the job that the child can do.
• Your opinion about yourself should not be connected with the achievements of your child.

Currently, parents are much better aware and informed about the importance of emotional attachment and the expression of love for their children. However, it should also be remembered that as a child grows, he/she needs independence to develop a sense of his own autonomy. Only in this way will the baby grow a self -sufficient and self -confident person. Remember this at any age. Good luck!

Video: How to love children correctly? What can not be done to parents!

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