The husband corresponds to another woman - why, what to do: Psychologists' advice

If your husband corresponds to another, then read the tips in the article. They will help to find a way out of the situation.

Marital fidelity, like love, is one of the key aspects of a happy family life. If at the very beginning the husband and wife usually do not have souls in each other, and do not even think about treason, then over the years the situation can become different. Boredom, routine, constant quarrels in the house-all this sooner or later leads to the fact that someone one “breaks down” and is decided on a dishonest act. Moreover, betrayal can be not only physical-in the age of electronic and Internet technologies to find a lover or correspondence mistress easier.

Read on our website an article on the topic "TOP-8 signs of her husband's betrayal". From this article you will learn how to understand that he is really wrong for you and found another.

As statistics shows, most often it is men who make virtual friends secretly from legitimate wives. Communication can be innocent, or go beyond friendly conversations. In any case, it hurts a deceived woman severe pain. Is it possible to cope with the problem and return your loved one to the family, or is the only way out - is it a divorce? We will find out the opinion of experienced psychologists and consider practical advice that saved more than one family from destruction. Read further.

How to understand that the husband corresponds with another woman: how to find out with whom the husband corresponds?

Female intuition is a rather powerful feeling that often accurately determines what is really happening. However, in the case under consideration, it is impossible to come to a partner with accusations of treason, reinforcing this with a phrase "I feel". We need more significant arguments, because we are talking about the fate of the family and the happiness of both spouses.

So, how can one understand that my husband has found a new hobby on the Internet and corresponds with another woman? How to find out who the husband is corresponding with? More and more simple, study the following obvious signs of betrayal:

Change in behavior:

• Your partner, always gentle and courteous, suddenly began to be rude to you? He became nervous and irritable, and sometimes even sharply reacts to elementary requests, which he previously fulfilled implicitly and with joy? Here is the first alarming bell.
• And vice versa. If suddenly your husband began to show more attention to you, succeeds you with gifts and crumbles with compliments, although he used to behave calmer, you must be wary.
• Most likely, so he is just trying to make amends for you and take suspicions from himself.

The partner spends a lot of time behind the phone, tablet, computer:

• Moreover, you know for sure that at a particular time he is not busy with his work. Yes, and will he hide the gadget if he really fulfills, say, an urgent order for the project?
• Another bell is a frequent filing by a new message signal.
• Your attempts to look at who wrote to him, stopped by his spouse in the bud, or even cause him aggression.

Emotions while reading the message:

• Often, the channers put a soundless regime or vibration so that the sound of an incoming messenger is minimal or absent at all.
• But, nevertheless, the man still cannot hide the fact that he reads the message.
• In this case, follow his emotions. When talking with another woman, he can smile, laugh periodically loudly, get involved in a conversation and not notice that you are nearby.
• Although some, especially dexterous traitors, learned how to make a “poker face” so as not to arouse suspicion.
• In this case, focus on other possible signs of a virtual novel in a loved one.

Checking the gadget from time to time:

• Even if the husband does not conduct intimate correspondence with the other at the moment, he will still periodically check the phone and see if a new message has come.
• In addition, he will never leave the gadget unattended, and if he has to do this, you cannot check anything.
• Firstly, he immediately removes his incoming and outgoing messages.
• Secondly, all his devices are worth a reliable password, and this is not a date of his birth or your wedding.

And you can also see the message received by your chosen one from the mistress. Even words, torn from context, but with a romantic meaning, should be a serious reason for you to think.

Where husbands correspond with other women, girls, women on the Internet: on different dating sites, Watsap, VK, other social networks

Modern technologies discover great opportunities for conducting love correspondence. Where do husbands with other women, girls, women on the Internet correspond? The most common of them are social networks:

• VK - VKontakte
• Classmates
• Facebook

These are the most common virtual places where men are looking for lovers by correspondence. Less possible, but not excluded option is social Network Instagram. In addition, often dishonest husbands create “left” accounts, signing a fictitious or alien name. In this case, it can be very difficult to convict them in treason.

Messengers are also used for correspondence:

• Weiber
• Watsap
• Telegram
• Facebook messenger, etc.

Here it is easier to establish the fact of treason if you find the chosen one “on hot” or find the opportunity to check the history of correspondence. But, unfortunately, this is not all. There are hundreds of special dating sites on the Internet, where loving personalities are looking for adventure secretly from their second halves. Here are just the most insignificant part of popular resources:

• Badu
• Mamba
• Tamo
• Love Planet
• Rusdate
• Loveeto and many others

The worst thing is that most men indicate not quite true information about themselves. In particular, in the column about marital status, they write that unmarried. Thus, men deceive not only their wives - legal or civilian - but also girls with whom they communicate on such sites.

Why my husband began secretly and constantly, during the year, to correspond with other girls: reasons

So, you learned (or suspected) that your spouse communicates with other women on the Internet, and this has been going on for quite some time. Before thinking about how to solve the problem and whether it is time to put an end to your relationship, try to understand what expressed your life partner on such an act. Why did my husband start secretly and constantly, during the year, to correspond with other girls? Perhaps this is your fault? No matter how hard it is to admit it, often the wives themselves are to blame for the fact that husbands begin to watch "to the left."

In general, psychologists call 12 reasonsby which virtual or real betrayals occur in families:

1. Lack of attention and communication. Home affairs, work, children, everyday routine and own hobbies can stand in the way of full -fledged relations between spouses. This is one of the most frequent reasons why men are looking for lovers on the Internet or real life.
2. The desire of the spouse is distracted by everyday problems and financial difficulties.
3. Fatigue, moral burnout.
4. Lack of romance in relations with the second half.
5. Boring sexual life Or complete disappearance of mutual attraction.
6. Crisis in a relationship. According to psychologists, there can be quite a lot of crisis moments in family life. The situation depends on how the spouses cope with difficulties, and whether they can jointly overcome them. If someone alone is weaker, he begins to look for an outlet on the side.
7. Lack of common interests, unwillingness or inability to discuss household chores and working moments together.
8. A man wants to achieve the attention of other womenBut real treason does not impress him.
9. The chosen one has no friendswho would share his interests.
10. The desire to communicate with new people.
11. Excessive enthusiasm for virtual life. This is a serious problem, since dependence on the Internet is not fiction, but, alas, reality.

This is far from a complete list of reasons why a man can start correspondence with other women. Some representatives of the stronger sex cannot suppress polygamy in themselves, and they literally attracts to beautiful girls. And even loving their wife, they are not able to cope with this attraction. Polygamy is not just the next reason for treason. This may be the essence of a man, and so that you do not try to undertake, everything is useless. The man will still change.

The husband corresponds to the ex -girlfriend: why, what to do?

If the husband corresponds with his ex -wife or girl, with whom he met for quite some time, do not rush to boil. Analyze the situation and call your loved one a frank conversation. Try to understand the motives of his act, but do not blame, do not scandalt and do not cry. Such actions can only aggravate the situation, but not correct it. Why does he correspond with her and what to do?

• One of the main reasons why husbands communicate with ex -wives is the presence of a common child. After all, a real loving father cannot delete a child from life only for the reason that he and his mother are no longer together.
• You, as an understanding wife, should not protest, but offer the chosen one your help.
• There is nothing wrong with spending a joint time with a child from a beloved man.
• And if you already have joint children, it is even better - they will have a brother or sister, and many dream of this.

If you don’t quite like this idea, then just keep calm and silence. The husband will not give up his child from his first marriage, and he will have to periodically communicate with his mother. Your claims and displeasure can cause high -profile scandals in the family, the consequences of which are sometimes quite serious.

The husband corresponds to a woman’s colleague: why does she write to him?

Especially jealous women can accuse the partner of treason even when he corresponds in a chat with a colleague of a woman at work. In fact, such communication does not always speak of a service novel - it is really related to corporate issues. But if it is alarming you, you can safely ask your husband an innocent question.

Why does she write to him? Ask if something happened at work, which he is worried about. If possible, approach the phone screen as much as possible to consider at least a few lines from the correspondence.

• If the partner reacts sharply to your curiosity, tries to hide what he has written by him or to him, or breaks into a scream, you can doubt that it is about work.
• However, when he really has nothing to hide, the chosen one will never blame you for excessive curiosity or invasion of personal space.
• He can complain about the annoyance or inexperience of his colleague, and will ultimately show you the story of correspondence with her.
• If this happens, close this topic and never open it again.

Do not try to push your husband or warn him, because he is forced to communicate with work people, even if his interlocutor is a young girl.

The husband corresponds with a friend: what to do?

At this situation, you can look at two angles:

The husband corresponds with his long -standing friend or girlfriend, with whom he has a lot in common:

• In fact, there is nothing wrong with this, because he could know this woman before meeting you, or your wedding.
• In such a situation, jealousy and suspicion will be superfluous.
• In addition, the spouse may well show you the story of correspondence with a friend if you ask him about it.
• But be prepared for refusal, because there may be something personal in the messages.
• Yes, this is a shame for you, but remember, because you also have small secrets from your lover.
• Feminine secrets that you can discover only to friends, or not tell anyone about them at all. In men in the same way, so sometimes you should not invade their personal space.

The husband corresponds to your girlfriend:

• Look again on the situation.
• Perhaps such correspondence is a very rare phenomenon, and your friend just wanted to ask the male council regarding a particular question.
• If the communication is annoying, constant, it contains elements of flirting, then you need to act.
• It’s not regrettable to drive friendship with such a person who is trying to get into someone else's family is dangerous, so you will have to stop any relationship between you and a girlfriend, as well as between her and your husband.

The main thing is not to chop off the shoulder. Almost any situation can be solved calmly and peacefully, if only you want it. Divorce is an extreme measure, so first consider everything several times. Do not know what to do, be sure to discuss the situation with your chosen one. Perhaps everything will become clear, and you were in vain.

How to behave if she found her husband for correspondence?

If you found your beloved for correspondence and are sure that his interlocutor is a woman, here is the first advice to you: take yourself together. Inhale deeply and exhale several times to put your thoughts in order and completely calm down. After that, try to call a partner for a frank conversation. How to behave correctly if she found her husband for correspondence?

• Explain to him that the situation is unpleasant for you.
• Bring to the note that from his constant sitting behind the phone it becomes lonely that you miss him.
• Tell the truth: you think that he does not love you anymore, he is not interested in you, you are afraid of betrayal in real life, etc.
• Do not postpone a frank conversation with your husband or guy in a long box. Remember that the longer you are silent and tolerate, the more your emotional suffering will become.

Remember: Closing the eyes on the already emerging problem can subsequently cause the implementation of your fears. Communication of her husband with another girl is quite able to develop into real treason and frequent meetings.

It is important not to be afraid to speak directly:

• If the correspondence of a partner with a girlfriend or mistress hurt you for the living, caused anger or oppression, do not be silent.
• Express everything to your husband, but only in a calm tone.
• If he is a decent and sane person, he will understand his mistake, and will no longer act inappropriately.

But, if he begins to deny, unlock and reproach or blame you in his act, then with such a person it is unlikely that he will be able to establish healthy and trusting relationships in the future.

I found out that the husband corresponds to another: the advice of a psychologist, how to maintain a relationship?

So, you learned that your chosen one, husband has a correspondence girlfriend, another woman, and their communication is not as innocent as it might seem at first glance. It contains not only correspondence, but also photo exchange, flirting, periodic calls from the video or other unacceptable actions. What can you do in this case? How to maintain a relationship?

First of all, your man himself must realize that the act committed against you is a betrayal on his part. And not only to understand, but also to admit it. Then you can move on to establish relationships with your lover.

What do psychologists say in this situation? Here are some tips:

Read the messages:

But only if you know for sure that you want it. Women often come up with problems themselves, which in reality may not be. Only if you, nevertheless, decide on this step, keep in mind that your chosen one may well refuse to view the history of its correspondence.

What can you see on your spouse's phone:

• Innocent communication limited by phrases "Hi. How are you? What are you doing?".
• Friendly correspondence with a light flirt, where the initiative comes exclusively from the interlocutor, and the man does not react or laughs at this.
• Intimate chat with the presence of erotic photographs on one or both sides.

It is precisely from what you will be able to find out when reading the correspondence of your loved one, you need to build on when making a decision. But before you decide on this step, think several times: do you really need it?

Find out the reasons:

• To find out why your chosen one began to communicate with another girl is the first thing you should do.
• Only your conversation needs to be built in a friendly form, without reproaches, scandals and “raids” on a lover.
• Show him that you are ready to listen to him, understand and forgive him, if necessary.
• Ask what did not suit him in your relationship, since he decided on a similar act.

Be as friendly and patient as possible. Do not interrupt or criticize. Let your partner first get the opportunity to speak out, and then together to analyze the situation and take the decision.

Devote more time to your beloved:

• Work, household chores and children are undoubtedly important.
• But to preserve healthy and strong relationships, as well as to add ardor and passion in them, try to devote as much time as possible to your loved one.
• Take a walk together, watch the movie, just talk.
• In addition, you can arrange a romantic evening, where you will be alone. Candles, music, muffled light - all this is not as corny as it seems.
• And if you are also rarely left alone, then this is completely necessary.

Interested in your spouse's affairs:

• Do not miss a single opportunity, not a single moment to deal with his mood, well -being, work at work and other things.
• This is only at first glance trifles and routine, in reality, this is another particle of attention that you pay to your loved one. And men love and appreciate it very much.

Take a look after yourself:

• After marriage, many girls cease to follow their figure and appearance.
• They think that now the beloved from them will not go anywhere, because they are connected by the bonds of marriage.
• But if you stop taking care of yourself and relaxing, these bonds will weaken, and this has already been verified for years.
• Therefore, always try to look attractive and beautiful for your chosen one.
• He simply cannot but appreciate your efforts, because they are all for him.

Read on our website an article on the topic "How to become better than you are?". It gives the advice of cosmetologists, stylists and other specialists.

Do not "attack" for any reason:

• When at home a constantly intense situation and the wife still “drank”, no man will endure this for a long time.
• Even if you have no mood, or at the moment your family is experiencing difficulties, this is not a reason to pour out all your anger at the chosen one.
• Thus, you only exhaust it morally, so his desire to relax on the side will look quite reasonable.

If something does not suit you, call your husband to a frank conversation. Ask him to change some qualities in himself. At the same time, you, in turn, be more affectionate and more patient. After all, both partners should work on relationships, then all efforts will certainly be crowned with success.

I correspond with my husband’s mistress: how to return him to a family?

Correspondence with her husband’s mistress is the worst and useless that you can do. How to return it to the family?

• Firstly, she is unlikely to compromise with you. This is an absolutely alien, stranger with whom you, in fact, have nothing in common.
• Secondly, the problem needs to be solved only together with her husband. If he does not want to stop this relationship, you will not succeed. He must understand and admit his mistake.
• Its desire to stay in the family is also important.

Then, perhaps (over time or immediately after the conversation), he will change his mind and make the right decision himself - to stay in the family.

What can not be done, can a wife correspond with an ex -husband?

When a woman finds out that her husband had a friend in correspondence, her sharp reaction is quite reasonable. However, in this state, you can easily flare up and make a mistake that can finally ruin the relationship, and even serve as the cause of the divorce. Therefore, remember the steps that you, as a wise woman, should not go when you encouraged your spouse in virtual treason. What can not be done?

Do not try to take revenge "treason":

• Of course, you will be offended to find out that your chosen one acted dishonestly, but do not do the same in revenge.
• Think: could you change if my husband had not done this first?
• If not, then your desire to reduce acquaintance with a stranger man in order to teach your spouse is a common resentment.
• Over time, the emotional storm will settle down, but the consequences of your rash solution will remain.
• Do you really want to reproach yourself for this? Hardly.

Do not humiliate yourself:

• Do not write to the rival, and do not beg your spouse to change your mind.
• Also, do not promise the golden mountains, do not get to the requests and oaths in all blessings.
• From this you will lose authority in the spouse’s eyes, and he will understand that he can afford even more low acts regarding you.

Hysterics and scandals - taboo:

• Remember, a man will be much easier to admit his guilt and try to rectify the situation if you behave calmly, but to speak honestly and frankly.
• But if he sees that you are inclined to arrange tantrums, he may well turn the situation against you.
• He will simply blame you for the fact that communication with another woman began precisely because of the lack of calm and constructive dialogue.
• Therefore, first calm down, and only after that start the conversation. It is likely that you and your husband can find a compromise.

Threatening suicide is unacceptable:

• Remember you - a self -sufficient and adult woman.
• And, above all, you should not forget this if you have a child in marriage with your beloved man.
• Blackmarks and attempts to kill themselves in front of the spouse can even push him away from you. But you are not at all achieved at all.

Correspondence with an ex -husband or guy:

• Perhaps you were previously married, or you have a friendly relationship with a former boyfriend.
• Do you think that after cheating on your husband, you can take revenge by starting a correspondence with the ex-jeher? Women often wonder: can a wife correspond with an ex -husband? This is a huge mistake, and earlier we already said why.
• Such communication will not bring you pleasure or relief.
• But it can provoke an even greater conflict, and in this case, reproaches will already fly in your direction.

The exception is only the situation when you and the "former" have common children. Then you want it or not, you will have to communicate with him, because he, as a father, should take part in raising children. Otherwise, if you have nothing to do with the “former”, except for colorful memories, and you do not see him in your life as a friend, you should not take a risky step to increase your own self -esteem.

The above actions are strictly unacceptable when clarifying relations between spouses in any situation. Whether the issue of betrayal concerns, or the conflict arose for another reason - it does not matter. Estimated and tranquility - first of all.

What to do if nothing helps: a psychologist's advice

Trying to talk with her husband about his correspondence, be prepared for the fact that your conversations, requests and exhortations may not lead to anything. That is, the spouse is quite capable of continuing communication with your rival. What to do in this case, if nothing helps? There are only a few options for the development of events. Here are the advice of psychologists:

Smill out with the situation:

• Just tolerate everything that is happening and wait for it to end - this is not so bad.
• In any case, the husband is next to you, he does not go anywhere, and all the money he earned remains in the family.
• Perhaps he will soon change his mind and stop his virtual adventures - you just need to tolerate.

Go to the family psychologist:

• If you can’t solve the problem yourself, trust it with a specialist.
• Sometimes the look and assessment of the situation from the outside, helps to solve the situation much better than its own efforts.
• Most likely, your chosen one will not want to voluntarily contact a specialist. You will have to persuade and make it clear that the family is crumbling.

Drop the relationship:

• This is the most difficult solution, think it over well.
• Psychologists advise submitting to divorce only if you are not sure that you are able to forgive your husband.
• If you think or are sure that you will reproach him for treason until the end of your life, then you really better leave your spouse, because in such an environment, real treason will become more likely.
• Also, divorce is simply necessary when the husband refuses to recognize his misconduct, or he really had virtual sexual connection with the girl (photo, video, intimate correspondence).

In any case, before making a decision, the consultation of a family psychologist will not interfere. After all, the divorce proceedings are stress for both spouses. And if they have a common child or several children, then this can negatively affect their psycho -emotional state.

The husband constantly corresponds to a man, with a friend: why?

Husband communication with the best friend is the smaller that should worry you. After all, in the end, you also communicate with your close friends, and tell them about the most secret. Men also have their own secrets, and they have every right to do so. This is a personal space that even children need, not to mention adults. That is why a husband can constantly correspond with a friend. But what to do if the wife is annoying?

• If you are very interested in what your chosen one is talking about with your friend, you can directly ask him this question.
• But remember that you should not try to stop their correspondence, because it will be dishonest in relation to the husband.
• When there is no rival, but there is only a male friend, no matter what they discuss, you should not get into it.

It is clear that you can think that your chosen one and your friend are talking about women. But remember, have you never discussed other men with a girlfriend? If the conversation is really harmless, the husband may well tell you everything honestly, or even show correspondence.

But there are also cases when the correspondence of a man with a man is not so harmless. Some men who are uncertain in their orientation make relations with women, but then understand that they are drawn to a one -year marriage. In this case, the correspondence will be intimate in nature and a woman can resort to all the advice that were described above.

Communication of men and women on the Internet does not always imply betrayal. Friendship between representatives of both sexes is quite possible, although this is a rarity. But when the fact of betrayal really exists, do not be afraid to take measures. The sooner you take up the solution to the problem, the less painful this process will be. Good luck!

Video: I found my husband's correspondence with another. The husband corresponds to another woman. Does your husband write to others?

Read on the topic:

• Husband on a dating site: virtual treason
• Should I give a second chance to a husband, friend?
• Why do I forgive him treason and can't leave?
• Conspiracy so that the husband does not change?
• 14 male mistakes that pushing a woman to treason