In this article, we will talk, which is a betrayal in the family and how to survive it.
Content
- What does it mean to betray a family - how to understand?
- Family betrayal: views
- Family betrayal by husband, wife: Reasons
- Treason as a betrayal in the family: features
- The husband betrayed and left the family, and now he asks back - what to do?
- What to do if you were betrayed?
- What to do if there is a betrayal in the family: reviews
- Video: What is betrayal? What to consider a betrayal? How to survive betrayal?
Today, the largest problem in young pairs is the betrayal in the family. Often, many do not even know that this leads to the complete destruction of family happiness, and, as a rule, it is impossible to restore relations in the end. Let's figure out what the betrayal means, where does it come from, and also how to survive it.
What does it mean to betray a family - how to understand?
Often, when a conversation about betrayal in the family comes in, basically everyone speaks only about physical treason. Most likely, this is because it is physical contact with another person that is a serious argument in parting. At the same time, a cold attitude or disrespect is not so serious reasons.
So what does it mean to betray the family? In fact, there are a lot of aspects and varieties and each of them destroys relations in its own way. Many types of betrayal are hidden and external relations seem to be prosperous, and treason is not very obvious. At the same time, it still affects the relationship and destroys them. Let's find out what types of betrayal are.
Family betrayal: views
So, as we have already said, betrayal in the family is of several varieties. They are as follows:
- Nonalness. It happens that one of the partners did not even think about a serious relationship. He just liked the man. Often the installation of a person in a person is such that it seems that you can meet and there are no options yet or business does not move to the wedding. In this case, while a person is convenient for a partner, then the betrayal as it would be sleeping. Well, as soon as it comes to real responsibility, the relationship will break up. The second partner, who remains devoted, tries to “drive” the first into the framework of obligations, for example, girls are trying to tie men with a child. It’s just that it can save a couple and it will work out, but there will be no emotional closeness in it.
- Emotional treason. Of course, couples that do not deceive each other and are emotionally close, do not experience such problems. But when someone else appears with whom the relationship is more trusting, for example, I want to tell what you can’t tell my husband-this is already emotional treason. Of course, it is impossible to close only on marriage, but here we are not quite about friendship, but about Platonic love. This is dangerous, because in them all secrets come out and can become known to everyone. Accordingly, this gradually moves away from her husband or wife.
- Creating a coalition. Only two should always be in a relationship. If someone third interferes with them, then they are destroyed. So “friendship against” can be very dangerous, because it is something like a hidden betrayal. For example, mom and husband create a coalition against the spouse. So, mother serves as additional support for her son, and he is always right.
- Emotional cold. Neglecting the feelings of the spouse is a grave betrayal. In close relationships, people feel when they need to be encouraged and supported. Men believe that if women are constantly sorry, then they will eventually complain. Well, or women, may not show pity, believing that a man will become a “nyun”. In any case, the cold in the relationship is destructive.
- Lack of respect. Constant insults, ignoring opinions, and so on - all this leads to the fact that love eventually becomes hostility. At first, such a partner’s attacks will surprise, but gradually the tension will increase and eventually flows into a loud scandal and parting. After that, there will be nothing good in the head about the partner.
In general, of course, betrayal itself is not a one hundred percent reason for parting. You can always try to return the former love and respect. The main thing is that both partners recognize the presence of problems and are ready to solve them. Otherwise, nothing will work out.
Family betrayal by husband, wife: Reasons
Betrayal in the family never arises just like that. There are reasons for this, which need to be found and eliminated as soon as possible so that the relationship does not deteriorate completely.
- Love. It may not be enough. If you are still young, then usually there are no problems. Although, maybe this if the choice is made incorrectly and hastily. Therefore, do not rush to build a family with someone you do not know. It is the lack of love, first of all, that leads to betrayal.
- Difficulties. Each family has problems and difficulties. We need to learn to overcome them together. If someone does not show interest in them, then this means that the family was created hastily or incorrectly. Or just a person has such a character. In this case, you need to learn how to behave as a single team or just find another person.
- New sensations. Perhaps one of the spouses is looking for new sensations outside the family, with another person. In other words, changes. As a rule, this can happen in any family, not only in young. In this case, it is worth saying that you should not start a family too early, but only when you yourself will be ready for this.
Treason as a betrayal in the family: features
In any case, you have already encountered most of the above situations, but you just did not know whether this could be considered as a betrayal. Everything is quite simple here, betrayal in the family is possible, but only it cannot be considered as if you did not agree on something at once and your personal expectations were violated.
Perhaps you lived in a family where everyone spends all their time constantly, regardless of circumstances and for you this is a certain standard. Well, the husband grew up in freedom, because his parents were constantly on business trips. So for him it’s not at all scary if relatives are not often gathering at the same table.
Accordingly, if the husband wants to go on vacation alone, then for you it will be a betrayal, but for him it is not obvious. He does not even understand that for you this is considered a betrayal. Perhaps you even think about physical treason.
Or here's another situation-you think that the husband should be a minister, and then went on maternity leave and after some time he sends you to work. And here is the betrayal for you, because he broke your ideas about the family. Moreover, he himself can assume that both spouses must earn in the modern world.
In these situations, the expectations of the spouse are simply violated. But what if the promises are still given? For example, a man promises to love and take care. That's all. And then several years of marriage passes, and the woman hopes for care to be given flowers, make compliments, but for some reason the man does it only on holidays. There is a feeling that you were betrayed.
As for real physical treason, in this case, some features must also be taken into account. Some men specifically claim that they cannot be monogamous and some girls even believe in it if they manage to convince her. This approach is really not very good. Moreover, this is how a man simply covers the fact that he is a womanizer. Whether to forgive treason, here already decide for yourself, but in any case, even if it was only once, not the fact that it will not happen again.
The husband betrayed and left the family, and now he asks back - what to do?
When betrayal is committed in the family, in particular treason, the man either leaves himself or the spouse drives him out. Sometimes, of course, they remain together. But let's talk about what to do if the husband still left and then wants to go back.
So, here is a divorce behind, you hardly survived the breakup and now you are easily breathing. Surely, you definitely don't want to go back. However, hope for new love never leaves. And now, having heard the children's “I will not be anymore,” they fall into a stupor. Usually, alcoholics, loafers, traitors do this. In general, those who count on forgiveness for the sake of a selfish purpose. Although at the same time, after the divorce, the husband could enjoy complete freedom.
In fact, there is nothing strange in his return. First of all, this shows how negligible he is and he did not come with achievements and changes, but only with words, well, maybe with gifts. With this method, he shows that he knows the mechanism of your forgiveness and this makes you simple -minded. What to do in this case?
- First of all, if you have feelings, remember, all his words
- Then analyze his behavior, whether the result coincides with the promises
It is important to understand the reasons for this behavior. For example, he was not satisfied with a new relationship. It happens that the husband leaves, and then returns, humiliating his mistress in order to cause good feelings of his ex -wife. So he enters your trust. Moreover, men know that the relationship that has begun with sex drive quickly breaks up. In this case, close the door in front of him if he only promises and persuades. Although, he could change his mind. Then he will achieve your location by any means.
But choleric and melancholy are prone to addictions. Such people are called addicts. They are constantly jealous, show aggression, try to tie to themselves. If such a person has changed and promises to change, then do not believe him. Everything will happen again.
Other reasons why the husband decided to return:
- My mistress left, now he is no longer as self -confident as before
- It is not possible to build new sensations. After several unsuccessful attempts, it seems that it is better to return back, where they always accept
- There is jealousy due to the fact that a new man has appeared. After all, as you know, all men are owners
- He realized that he had changed for the worse
Women often return to such husbands when they are not confident in themselves, but he is also trying, well, how can one not believe in their need. Although this is actually a fiction. Of course, if you come together, then the self -esteem of both will grow, but the situation will not change. The woman will be afraid of new betrayals.
By the way, the reasons can be selfish. For example, the woman achieved heights, but the man did not even expect this. Moreover, if he himself earns little or does not work at all, then he would definitely occur to him to win back his ex -spouse. Just think what you get from such a man? Maybe it is better to pay attention to a self -sufficient person? Well, if the husband went to another, then he is unlikely to be self -sufficient. In this case, think about whether he can go up to your level? If he needs a mother, then let him go to her, and you are not obliged to answer for his mistakes.
In any case, whether to let your husband back is to decide. However, weigh the pros and cons of such a decision.
What to do if you were betrayed?
And let's talk about what to do if a betrayal has occurred in the family, but no one is going to return. In fact, you need to survive this. And our tips will help to do this as efficiently as possible.
- Ideally, find a psychologist who is able to solve your problem. This is an excellent means to combat stress
- Stay alone with you and splash all the pain - listen to the music loudly, shout, cry and so on. All this will bring you relief
- Ask for help from loved ones. This is also a good option-talk to someone you trust. Twist emotions and it will become easier for you
When the first stage is passed, it remains to go through many more tests. You will fight them every day, but in the end you will change your life for the better. Fight resentment, even if you have a strong character, it will be difficult. But just remember that the choice remains with you - to live days in despondency or pull yourself together.
Most importantly - remember yourself, start love. For example, you can do self -development or knowledge of yourself. Learn the new and do not return to the past. And at the same time, in no case do not blame yourself for what happened.
What to do if there is a betrayal in the family: reviews
Many forums discuss the betrayal in the family. For the most part, this concerns cheating, but still, there are many good tips from girls who have already been in this situation and successfully coped with her. We offer you to familiarize yourself with several reviews from other girls.
Video: What is betrayal? What to consider a betrayal? How to survive betrayal?
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