From this article you will find out why the spouse does not want to work and what to do with it.
Content
- Why does the husband do not want to work: psychology, reasons
- The husband pretends to work - infuriates: what to do?
- The husband does not want to work - what to do?
- What should not be done if the husband does not want to work?
- The husband does not work and dreams of business - what to do?
- What to do if a man does not want to work - leave or stay?
- What to do if a man does not want to work: a psychologist's advice
- The husband does not want to work - what to do: reviews
- Video: It seems to me that my husband simply does not want to work. What to do?
Since ancient times, it is believed that a man is the head of the family. It used to be really so, because men were much stronger and more resilient. The obligation to protect and ensure the family fell on their shoulders. However, in the modern world, everything has changed and now the distribution of roles in the family is not the same as before. At the moment, no one is surprising that the family is the main one in the family. But, despite this, I still want to see a strong man who can take the main place nearby. Often there are couples where a man does not work. What to do with him? What is the reason for his unwillingness to go somewhere? Let's find out.
Why does the husband do not want to work: psychology, reasons
Women are always surprised that the husband does not want to work and they cannot even answer this question. In fact, there can be a huge number of reasons for this behavior. Many of them are subjective, but there are general criteria.
- The husband recently worked and was reduced or asked to quit Due to some circumstances. Surely, he is at a loss and does not know what to do next.
- Perhaps he has a rare profession or the one that is not in demand in the market. Maybe earlier it was valued, and now has lost its relevance. It also happens that a person understands that what he does he does not like and from here there are pauses in his career.
- Your spouse is simply a lazy person. Men quickly get used to it when a woman acts as a mother and solves all her problems, including general ones. So why should he strain if she does everything herself? Of course, the man relaxes and rests. The main thing is to recognize such a man before the wedding, otherwise it will be difficult to part with him later.
- The man is Alfons.Yes, indeed, it happens. He has a sea of \u200b\u200bcharm, he shows you great love, but, as you know, women love his ears. Look, does he really do what he says? He is in no hurry to look for work and finds a lot of reasons for this? And you give him money, rejoicing that he loves you. This is a real Alphonse.
- Infantility.For example, your spouse is not used to solving some major issues on your own. Maybe his parents always helped him, and now he does not know what to do. In this case, it is necessary to teach him everything and most importantly, not to be afraid of problems.
Your spouse has a bad character because of which it is difficult for him to converge with people, relations in the team do not get along and so on. Therefore, he just sits at home and prefers not to work.
The husband pretends to work - infuriates: what to do?
There are also such situations that the husband does not want to work, but persistently pretends to be busy with something. At the same time, he brings little money or does not bring at all. As a rule, he simply earnings sometimes so that you do not swear. It is difficult to solve such a problem, because a man may be really sure that he earns and sincerely not understand what does not suit you.
In this case, try not to give him money. At all. And it doesn’t even matter that he has worn out another T -shirt or wants to drink a beer behind football. Be tougher. Then he himself will begin to understand that there is nowhere to take the means and will begin to work at least a little more. The main thing is that his parents help you and also do not give money.
At the same time, start saving for food. Explain that you have no money and you are waiting for his help, but do not say that you are doing it on purpose. Come up with something, for example, that your salary has sharply decreased.
The husband does not want to work - what to do?
Perhaps you have already determined the reasons why your husband does not want to work. Regardless of the situation, it is important to resolve the issue. So how to make a man work and earn?
- First of all, remind him of responsibility. He lives in the family, and when he married you, certain duties were assigned to him, which he now does not want to fulfill. You can not live in a family with children and wife and at the same time lead a selfish lifestyle, in which it is convenient only to him.
- If a man tries to do at least something, then do not leave everything as it is. Try to offer your help, for example, in search of a suitable place. In this case, there is nothing wrong, because you at least look at your husband from the side. Maybe he himself overstates the requirements and therefore does not succeed in anything?
- Become a companion for him, not a mother. If you are used to taking care of everyone, then, for sure, you yourself are not too happy about this. When men feel excessive custody, they feel like children and behave accordingly. Do not relax your husband. Never do everything for him, because then it will be very difficult for you.
- Try to find a part -time job, at least temporary. Your financial situation will improve from this, and a man will believe in himself. The most important thing is that the part -time job does not become the usual way of life. Gradually, the husband must switch to permanent work.
- Give him confidence. Perhaps the man does not believe in himself too much. Think, if he needs work and you are looking for it for him, then he is unlikely to feel confident. The format of relations, when a man is a minister and a defender, is slightly outdated, but still in men it sits tightly in his head. You must make it clear to the person that you are ready to wait and help. A normal man will appreciate this approach and do everything to achieve what is desired.
It is important to understand that the reasons for the lack of employment in a man are very important. If you can figure it out, then all the problems will quickly be solved.
What should not be done if the husband does not want to work?
When the husband does not want to work, it is important to know not only how to solve the problem, but also about how to do this. Depending on the psychotype of a man, even a parasite can become a worker and a minister. If a woman came across a mother’s son, then psychologists recommend being patient, because the behavior of a man was laid from childhood and it will be extremely difficult to change.
- Never require a man to work in a man, especially screams. In this case, you will get the opposite effect - it simply will not spite you do anything. It is better to praise him for some achievements in work and emphasize how important the salary is for the family budget.
- Hint that if a man worked, then you would have more possibleshe is to fulfill the desires of each family member. Do not say that only him. If you are persistent and sincere, then the results will appear very quickly. The man will gradually become the head of the family.
- If your husband is an egoist, then such methods will not work, because he is not used to refusing himself anything. It is best to reduce funds for its maintenance in this situation. Tell me that you were reduced to salaries, and there are not enough funds not only for it, but even for the most necessary. A spoiled man certainly does not want to lose his favorite pleasures.
- Perhaps this situation will force him to work. Just keep in mind that not everyone likes working in the office and even more so at the factory. In this case you can invite him to do freelance. This approach allows you to become a popular specialist and solve a large number of problems.
- If your husband is a melancholic, then he will take time. We will have to constantly praise his achievements and solution. Do not allow any criticism and negativity in relation to him. So you will only do worse. In the best case, everything will return to the usual direction, and at worst it will become even more difficult.
The husband does not work and dreams of business - what to do?
Often women are interested in what to do if a man does not want to work and at the same time dreams of opening his own business? In fact, many do not recommend giving him money. First of all, because business is a very risky business and not the fact that it will go uphill. As a result, there are great chances that you will be left not only without money, but also with debts, and the man himself will not help anything.
The best solution in this case is to send it to earn it yourself. If all dreams remain dreams and movements to them do not happen, then a man will not work in business. There is much more responsibility than in ordinary work. So, if he does not want to do anything to open the work, then in business itself he will hardly show himself.
What to do if a man does not want to work - leave or stay?
For most women, it is very important - if the husband does not want to work, then get away from him or stay? In fact, here it is already only you to decide. To begin with, of course, you can try to solve the situation. Perhaps your husband will become a earner and problems will disappear by themselves. However, as practice shows, this is rare. Of course, you should not live with such a man. While you do not have children, the situation does not seem so critical-it seems that there is enough money, and somehow I don’t want to swear. But only when a child appears, a woman begins to realize that her man is also as small and she has to take care of two at once. At the same time, all expenses fall on a woman. Think for yourself, do you want such a life? If not, then why do you need such a man?
What to do if a man does not want to work: a psychologist's advice
Usually the husband does not want to work when he has problems with professional employment if a woman does not want to leave him, then she will have to gain great patience to solve the problem. Of course, when there are no children in the family, you can just part and find another man, but in the case of their presence, the situation is complicated. How to be? After all, the child should be brought up in a full -fledged family? And now what to drag a parasite on yourself? Not at all!
Psychologists in terms of solving this problem advise first to find the reasons why the earlier spouse suddenly ceased to be such. Or maybe he was always like that? In any case, it is like a disease and therefore it makes no sense to treat symptoms with a banal requirement to find a job. In this case, a more thoughtful approach is required.
- You can scream as much as you like and force your husband to find a job, but all that you can achieve is that he will simply create the appearance of searches. So here we need to look for real reasons.
- Keep in mind that the situation will be corrected, unless a man wants it. If not, then nothing will work. He will not look for a job if he himself does not want to. You must find out what exactly happened to him, why he does not want to look for work, and also find out what requirements he has. Explain that if he himself does not want to do anything, then parting awaits you. He must understand that your joint life largely depends on him.
- If in this case nothing happens and he is constantly looking for an excuse for his idleness, then act more radically - temporarily part with him. Let him stay on his own and see what he would live in freedom. Perhaps he will quickly pick up himself. Otherwise, it makes no sense to try to maintain such a relationship. If you are satisfied with such a relationship, then you can continue to continue in the same spirit - tolerate and do not complain.
- If a man makes contact and maintains your position, then try to help him. Determine in which direction it is worth moving and convincing that you support it. Only in this way can you overcome all problems.
The husband does not want to work - what to do: reviews
If the husband does not want to work, then often women turn to the forums for help and ask for advice from others who have been in a similar situation. As a rule, they advise you to run to hell and look for a new man. In any case, you must decide what exactly is worth doing, but reading the information is also useful, perhaps you will find something suitable for yourself there.
Video: It seems to me that my husband simply does not want to work. What to do?
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