What is personal space and why a person needs it: useful tips on personal boundaries

What is personal space and why a person needs it: useful tips on personal boundaries

Many couples look forward to when they go together to the altar, and begin to live together officially. Now, as they say in a wedding oath, they must share sorrows and joys, care and everyday situations.

The husband and wife spend a lot of time together - they sleep together, cook food and do household chores. Each couple dreams of harmony in a relationship. However, in order to achieve it, it is necessary to respect each other's personal space. From this article you will learn what personal space is, and how you can not violate it.

What does personal space mean?

  • For each person, it is common to decide who he will be close to himself and who is not. A person’s personal space is a concept that includes a large number of factors. Among them are habits, hobbies, desires, needs.
  • Personal boundaries, if no one violates them, makes a person more balanced, and brings comfort to his life. It is important to know the boundaries, and not to cross them. After all, the invasion of personal space can ruin the relationship between you.

Types of personal space

There are several areas of personal boundaries:

  • The area of \u200b\u200bphysical space.People living together have their own physical space - a place for storing things and personal hygiene products. You can’t take them into your hands without permission or shifting them from place to place, because this can ruin the relationship between people.
  • If you have a place where you like to work or relax, then your partner also has it. It should not be occupied. When you pick up the things of another person, and he is very outraged by this, you should not be offended by him. This is not greed, but just personal boundaries that he is not ready to allow violating.
Comfort at the physical and mental level
Comfort at the physical and mental level
  • Area of \u200b\u200binterest. Often in families there are conflicts against the background of the fact that one of the partners do not like the hobbies of a loved one. Do not insist that he abandoned his hobby. This will be regarded as a violation of personal boundaries.
  • It is best when beloved people have common interests. This will allow them to spend more time together, and get more pleasure from life. If you are not ready to do the same as your partner, just do not bother him to get involved in his favorite business. This is his outlet, which allows you to distract from trouble at work or household chores.
  • Recreation area. Everyone knows how it is better for him to relax. Some prefer to be alone with themselves, and reflect on the sore. Others believe that it is better to spend time watching your favorite movie or swing in a car. There are people who prefer to spend time in noisy companies. You should not try to change the partner. Learn to understand it, and accept it as it is.
Different people have different boundaries
Different people have different boundaries

Personal space in a relationship: should it be?

  • A person is vital for his personal boundaries are not violated. This allows him to do what he wants. If you began to notice that your loved one spends more time in the distance, this does not mean the lack of feelings. He just needs solitude.
  • Even if you have warm and passionate relations, this is not an indicator that a person will give up the possibility of retirement. We can say that this is his internal need. If you constantly control a person, this can create discomfort to him.
  • Most modern young couples believe that it is best to spend time together. They are convinced that this will strengthen their relationship. However, it is not. If you are constantly next to each other, it will develop into internal tension. This can cause frequent quarrels and conflicts.
  • The human soul needs rest. Personal space is not a whim, but an important element in life. And this should be understood, both a man and a woman.
Observe the space of the partner
Observe the space of the partner

A small amount of freedom can warm up feelings, and strengthen harmony. Studies of psychologists have shown that people who show respect for each other's borders become much closer than if they spent time together constantly.

If the couple does not violate the personal space in the relationship, this will allow:

  • relax and relax;
  • relieve nervous tension;
  • restore internal energy;
  • to feel that a partner is a necessity;
  • consider things from a different angle.

How to learn not to violate the boundaries of personal space?

  • We figured out the values \u200b\u200bof personal space. Now you need to understand how to allow a person to be alone with himself, without harm to the relationship.
  • We will talk about what tricks you can improve the personal space of the couple. If you use them, this will significantly strengthen the connection in pairs.
The difference in space
The difference in space

Review your behavior

  • Analyze how you behave in a relationship. It is possible that you i violate the personal space of a man. He may not talk about it, because he respects your feelings. However, sooner or later a person will break. And then the conflict will be quite difficult to avoid.
  • If you are just starting to develop relationships, then the invasion of personal boundaries may seem like a manifestation of care. At first, this may seem very pleasant and harmless. However, when people have long been together, such behavior begins to depress.
  • In order not to provoke conflict and quarrel, try not to show obsession initially. If your beloved person wants to spend time alone with himself or go to friends, you should not change his habits. Do not beg with him at a party or meeting. Let him enjoy the solitude as he considers necessary. This will only strengthen your relationship.

Find yourself a lesson

  • Start engaged self -development. Each person, let him deny this, have hobbies that are not related to the second half. If you have friends, get together with them, and visit a cafe, bar, restaurant, spa.
  • Perhaps you are fond of music. Then it is ideal to learn a piano or another musical instrument. Dive your time only to yourself.
  • This method allows you to establish relationships in pairs that have been living together for a long time. They need to be able to relax from each other. After a time spent in different places, their connection will only get stronger.
  • It is important to understand that you and your loved ones may differ in interests. This is quite normal, and it should not be changed. Attempts to change interests can become a stumbling block. Do not install ultimatums, and do not force a partner to give preference to your interests.
  • Be smarter. Let yourself and your partner deal with those things that he considers necessary. You can also find a compromise. For example, today you will share the interests of your beloved, and tomorrow he will go with you. However, such compromises are not often possible. After all, one way or another, but they violate the personal boundaries of a person.

Stop control

  • Do not control every step of your partner. He is not your property. Most girls like to read correspondence on the guy’s phone, or secretly enter his pages on social networks. By this, you violate his personal space, which can lead not only to the conflict, but also to the end of the relationship.
  • Put yourself in the place of the partner. If he behaved the same, did you like it? It is likely that your answer will be negative. Then why do you allow yourself to behave like that?
  • Learn to perceive your loved one as an independent person who has the right to personal boundaries. If he is absent at home, do not call every few minutes to find out when he returns. Believe me, such simple tips will help you establish a trusting relationship, and achieve harmony.

You should not overly patronize a person

  • We must not forget that love and care is a pillar on which any relationship is built. You just need to know the measure.
  • You can give an analogy with dessert. For example, you like a cake. But, if the amount of sugar is constantly growing in it, then the taste will become sugary, and it will become impossible to eat it.
  • This also applies to relationships. If you constantly patronize your partner, it will get bored with it. Do not think that guardianship of 24/7 will strengthen your relationship. Most likely, everything will be exactly the opposite.
  • In a relationship you need to show tenderness, love and care. The main thing is to know the measure.

Do not demand love

  • No need Force a person to show tenderness and love. He must do it sincerely. This behavior helps to harmonize relationships. However, one should not demand that he show tenderness and care every minute spent together. Scenes, nerves and quarrels have never strengthened relations.
  • First, understand why do you not get due attention. It is possible that your loved one is faced with difficulties at work, and therefore cannot devote time to you. Sit down, and calmly talk about it. Give him time to recover.

How to protect personal space: tips

If you want to maintain relationships tender and harmonious, adhere to such recommendations:

  • Stop trusting. Speak honestly with each other, expressing your feelings and discontent. So you will be honest with yourself.
  • Soul conversations. If you have a misunderstanding, talk directly with your loved one. Take an interest in his feelings.
  • Learn to concede. A compromise is one of the most important factors in building relationships.
  • Do not blame your partner. If you want calmness, and the partner violates your boundaries and requires attention, do not scream and do not hang all the dogs on him. Moreover, do not remember that you once wanted attention, but he did not pay it to you. So you settle in a man a feeling of guilt.
  • Do not check his phone or social networks.
  • Learn to calmly perceive the fact that the partner needs personal space and talk about such a need yourself, do not hesitate. If a person really loves you, then he will understand why this is so important for you.
  • Do not forget that you need to devote time to your loved one. Personal space is good, but communication is much more important.
  • Try to find points of contact. Perhaps you will find common interests with your partner.
A person should have his own space
A person should have his own space

Each person has personal boundaries, regardless of his social status and age. And no one has the right to violate them. If the partners respect each other's personal space, it will strengthen their relationship, and will allow you to find happiness. Show attentiveness to your loved one, and try to speak heartily more often.

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Video: Psychology of relations and personal space



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