Becoming older, we all begin to think about the second half, of the desire to create a strong and loving family in which peace and comfort will reign. However, is it so simple to create a happy family, and this will be discussed in the article.
In fact, only a few consider their marriage to be happy and there are many reasons for this. Today we will try to figure out how a happy marriage is different from the unfortunate.
How a happy marriage is different from the unfortunate: 15 main signs
Initially, almost all marriages are considered happy, but this lasts, as a rule, the first few years of living together, and someone even less. After this time, the couple seems to forget why it created a family and here the real hell begins.
We present to your attention 15 in our opinion the most striking differences in a happy marriage from the unfortunate:
- There is a happy marriage High -quality and regular sex. Whoever says, but sex is the basis healthy, happy and long -term love relationships. It has long been known that it is impossible to maintain and improve relations, being a couple who just sleeps on the same bed, eats together and occasionally selected on vacation. A happy marriage is possible only if in it besides sincere proximity It will also be bodily. Since if there is no such bodily proximity between partners, sooner or later they will begin to look for it on the side. Of course, over time, the former Passion subsidesAnd I want to engage in carnal consoles not like before. This happens for various reasons, the health of partners and the woman’s health are taken into account here, however, it’s certainly not a reason to negate sex. Therefore, if something does not get along in your sexual life, do not ignore it, but seek help from specialists, or do it yourself, good that in our time there are sex shops, various literature, medicines, etc.
- There is no constant control. Let’s honestly, well, who would like it if his partner constantly controlled every step, reminded of what to do and what is categorically not needed? Nobody. That's why you do not need to cut half constant at first glance harmless tips. Two live in a happy marriage independent and self -sufficient person, and none of them needs control. Remember, each bang has the right to his personal space, for a time that he can spend as he wants. In a happy marriage, every partner has personal space And the time for personal affairs, which, as it were rudely sound, do not concern another partner in principle.
- There is no criticism and ridicule. Constructive criticism Being is a fact, because in this way we are improving and developing, but here we are talking a little about something else. In a happy marriage there is no place for comparisons with someone, mockery Regarding the fact that the partner cannot, doesn’t look like that, is not so smart, etc. In the end, we choose our own couple ourselves and if after some time she begins not to arrange us with something , first of all, the questions need to be asked for yourself. In a happy marriage, they suggest how to do it, they help to do if one of the partners can not cope, they show on a personal example how to change, etc., but no way do not reproach, do not humiliate and do not mock.
- In a happy marriage, there is no place for a clear distribution of responsibilities. Of course, leading family life, life is not so simple, but this does not mean that the house where the couple lives should be like the army. In unfortunate marriage, all responsibilities are clearly divided and if, for example, a man should only work, and a woman is always only do household chores, sooner or later comes chaos And begins swearing. Why? Well, here the woman is tired, she was just bored with all the time to do a uniform job, and she asks her husband to help her wash the dishes. To which the man will begin to be indignant, that he is already getting tired at work, he does everything that a man should do, and now my dishes are still. But in a happy marriage Spouses are always ready to insure each other, they do not see the problem that one of them is if necessary will perform an unusual work for them. In such a marriage, the spouses act as companions, they are not fixated at duties and never swear due to dirty dishes that are not caused by garbage.
- There are no complaints behind your back in a happy marriage, including relatives. In a happy marriage, none of the partners never allows himself to discuss the other with someone behind him. This also applies to those moments when the couple swears. In their relationship there is no place for other people's opinions and advice. Also, in such a marriage, they never discuss the relatives of the partner. Remember, we do not choose relatives of the husband/wife, but we choose a husband/wife for ourselves, so we must whether we want it or not, accept them, because they are part of the life of our loved one. To discuss them with someone is equivalent to discussing a partner. And most importantly, you need to remember that our relatives may also not like something to our loved one, so in order to avoid unpleasant situations, it is better regarding all this adhere to neutrality. In an unhappy marriage, there is always a place for accusations and discussions and relatives of a loved one, and himself. Here you are dissatisfied with the mother -in -law/mother -in -law, and always coming to the brothers/sisters, and complaints about the partner to their friends/friends.
- In a happy marriage, they always seek to spend time together. Each of us has work, their problems, unforeseen circumstances. However, the family cannot exist if you do not communicate with each other and do not spend time together. And here we are not talking about the fact that you are sleeping or eating together, it is about a family vacation. Everyone probably heard how often they say “we need to take a break from each other,” but in fact we need to strive to ensure do not get tired of each other. Of course, there should be time for itself, but also joint leisure. In a happy marriage, there is always a place for family sorties, while in the unfortunate everyone “plays” on their own, because people not interesting to spend time togetherMoreover, they do not want to waste time on each other.
- In a happy marriage, feelings are not faded away because they are able to feed them. In a happy marriage even after 10 years reigns atmosphere of love, tenderness and passion, Since partners are trying to constantly delight each other and surprise. In such a marriage, they always speak of their feelings, confess love, make compliments, call affectionate words, give gifts and flowers. In an unhappy marriage, it is believed that flowers and kisses under the moon are for adolescents, and people who have 2/10 years of life together no longer need this.
- In a happy marriage there is no place for consumer attitude. In a happy family, they never do something for their own benefit, do not help the partner, wanting to get something in return. But in an unfortunate marriage there is a place for this behavior. Partners often do anything only in exchange for some benefit for themselves. For example, “I will take out the garbage, and you go to the store”, “Okay, I will remove in the apartment, but you will buy me ...”, etc.
- In a happy marriage, people know how to quarrel correctly. It will seem strange to many, because why quarrel, and how can it be done right in principle. In fact, the right quarrels - the key to the development of relations. Conflict, we see our own and other people's negative qualities and the parties should always do work on mistakes. Thus we become better, wiser and more experienced. In an unfortunate marriage from quarrels and conflicts, they do not endure any experience, do not draw conclusions and do not seek to change the situation.
- In a happy marriage, every partner all the time it develops, self -improves and works on itself. In such relationships, people understand that marriage is not the end of personal achievements, personal growth, etc., therefore they try all the time change for the better, improve yourself spiritually, physically and mentally. In an unhappy marriage, there is no such work on themselves, since the majority believes that this is not something necessary.
- In a happy marriage, they know how to listen and hear. If the marriage is happy, then the partners are always trying to listen to each other and do it not because of any duty, but because they worry about each other and want to help. At the same time, people not only listen to each other, but also hear, make some conclusions from the story of the second half, try to penetrate the situation and be sure to support. In an unhappy marriage Such conversations are rare, in it they most often occur because “necessary”.
- In a happy marriage They know how to discuss the problems that have appeared, and most importantly they know how to do it correctly. Imagine the situation, the family began to lack money, the main minister in this family is a man. In a happy marriage woman He will correctly present this information and always offer at least some options for its solution. She will not scream at her husband, scandalize with him and scold him, especially since she will not demand from her husband a few more works. In an unhappy marriage woman He will begin to reproach a man, begin to insult him and accuse him that he cannot support their family.
- In a happy marriage each of the partners puts himself in the place of the otherThus, they can understand how a loved one feels, see their mistakes in behavior. This practice helps spouses avoid many problems and disagreements. In an unhappy marriage, everyone is not for themselves, the spouses are not interested in each other's condition and therefore they do not see the need to put themselves in the place of another partner to understand his feelings and experiences.
- In a happy marriage, they know how to laugh. It means laughing in a good way, of circumstances, problems, over oneself and over a partner. Such laughter discharges the situation, brings people together, makes problems not so insoluble and serious. It is about such laughter that he prolongs life. In our case, we can say that it improves the quality of family life. In the unfortunate marriage of the spouse They do not know how to joke kindly over themselves, each other, they always perceive all problems as something unbearable and insoluble. Hence conflicts, quarrels and reproaches of failure, in the impossibility of solving the problem, etc.
- In a happy marriage spouse Not only people who love each other, but also friends, partners. They always share the interests of each other, never limit each other in choosing and actions, from here they have complete understanding and trust. Such spouses are always a mountain for each other, they have a lot of common topics for conversation, despite this, it is even comfortable for them to simply be silent together. But Unhappy marriage It cannot boast of such a trusting relationship. Initially, it is built on feelings and love, however, when such feelings are slightly subsided, there is simply nothing to nourish them.
Criteria by which you can Determine a happy marriage or not There are many, but each family can differ, because everyone has different things. In order for your the marriage was truly happylove each other, appreciate and respect, and also try to take less and give more.
Everyone who is worried about their marriage is happy, we advise you to read the following articles:
- Happiness in a second marriage with a child
- How to live happily with a child and a new man?
- Acquaintance of a man and child
- Will the second marriage be happy?
- How to understand that a man is unhappy in marriage?
- Is it real and how to get married if there is a child from the first marriage?
Honesty should always be and in everything