Is it right if the girl first writes to the guy? Who should write the first guy or girl?

Can I write the guy first? Is this permissible? Will he consider me immodest? These and other questions are often asked by girls who cannot understand why the guy does not show initiative and does not get in touch first.

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Fearing to seem obsessive, the girl is tormented by doubts: is it worth taking the first step herself or still wait until the man does it. Meanwhile, the man is silent. Why?

Reasons why a guy may not write the first

For male silence there are a number of explanations. And if a girl at least approximately imagines the character of her chosen one and his psychology, then she herself can understand which factor works in a particular situation.

So, the man does not write first, because:

The most unpleasant motivation for girls is his behavior - the guy simply was not interested. A man by nature is a minister, a hunter. And if the goal does not seduce it, he will not hunt for her, i.e. Call, write and in other way try to look for communication.
Young man It has a shy character He is timid and not confident in himself. He may want to continue communication, but is afraid that his initiative will be perceived as obsession. Or the guy doubts that the girl is interesting.
Not the last place, among a number of reasons, is also occupied by the dislike of many young people to communication on social networks, SMS correspondence and other methods of communication through writing. Such guys prefer telephone or live communication.
During your communication, something happened that could angry him or offend him. Perhaps an awkward situation happened, a rude word was uttered from the girl, an ironic look and other moments that make the man be offended.
A possible cause of silence that has absolutely nothing to do with this girl can become Strong employment, trouble, serious problem and other negative pointswho arose in the life of a young man and absorbed all his attention. If easier, then he is simply not up to communication with the beautiful sex.
The man liked another girl, and at this time he is busy “hunting” for new prey. There is nothing to be done here, it remains only to wait until he satisfies his hunting instincts. If the girl is not ready to wait, it is better to forget about such a guy right away, since the craving for conquering and conquest will not go anywhere.
The reason may lie in the behavior of the girl herself. For example, she wants to look smarter, more beautiful, more mysterious in the eyes of a man. Hence the artificiality and falsehood that a man feels a mile away. Naturally, such a lady is unlikely to write.

The reasons why the girl can write the first

There are a number of reasons that enable the girl to transgress a generally accepted opinion and write to the guy first. When can I write the first?

These include:

If the guy belongs to those who prefer telephone conversations and direct communication, and the relationship with the girl is already quite serious, the girl may well afford to gently hint, including in writing, that she would be very pleased to read and re -read the words of her lover addressed to her.
The girl may be the first to contact a guy with a letter if she the man is to blame, and this is exactly what his stubborn and long silence is caused.
The girl understands that the young man likes her, but he is so indecisive and not self -confidentthat simply does not dare to write to her. Then you can take the initiative on yourself to push the guy to action.
There are men who masterfully pause only to watch how the girl behaves. If the representative of the fair sex understands that she came across just such a copy, she can make him understand that she is able to act decisively.
If in any of the social networks, and even more so-on the dating site, the girl liked the guy, then it is quite acceptable to show her interest in him, doing it naturally, funny and unobtrusive.
She is just bored, she feels lonely And I want to do something, for example, by finding an interesting interlocutor. Then the girl writes to the guys for the sake of entertainment.
The girl needs help or advice of a man. In this case, she clearly indicates the purpose of her letter, but this does not mean that such “business” communication does not develop into something more personal.
The girl writes the first to the first one, with whom she was previously associated. Perhaps she wants to return them?

Who should write the first: a guy or a girl?

And again - about stereotypes that always give the initiative to the hands of a man. This is going on long ago, and is still almost a generally accepted norm. Of course, such a public worldview suggests that in any case, the guy should first take a step in the relationship by writing the girl he liked. There is a certain logic in this, because, having said nothing and without daring to action, you can miss a chance and then regret it for a long time.
But let's take into account the fact that the psychology of the girl is already different today. The fair sex is more decisive than men, and for the most part are more initiative. Therefore, in our time, for a girl, a public opinion is no longer an obstacle-she achieves her goal, not really looking at him.
In addition, by writing the first, the girl in any case intrigues a man - if not beauty, then courage. Therefore, he is unlikely to want to leave her message unanswered - he will simply be interested to know what kind of person it is. Thus, the girl is given the opportunity to demonstrate her best qualities in the process of communication.

If the girl does not specifically write to the guy to puzzle him and make him think about the reasons for her silence, it is possible that he, in turn, can begin to ignore her, especially if the relationship is only in the initial stage.

Therefore, there is only one conclusion: you should not think about what "people say." You need to act as the heart and feelings suggest. If the girl wants to write the guy first - she may well do it. The same applies to the guys: I like the girl, I want to communicate with her - you need to boldly write.

How can a girl understand whether the guy should be written first or not?

Tormented by the question “Write the first or wait until he writes himself?”, The girl is best analyzed for a few points.
First, think about does she really like the guy so much that she is ready to neglect established norms. If the girl feels that her life is filled without the presence of a given young man in her, then it is hardly worth sending a message. In this case, it is better to really wait for the first step on his part. If it is made, wonderful, the girl will be able to better understand whether a man is dear to her. If not, no tragedy will happen, because she already has something to do, and there are many guys around.
Secondly, to “delve” into the possible reasons for the silence of the guy who are listed above. Having carefully examined each of them, we can conclude that if a man is interested in a girl, then sooner or later he will get in touch. Therefore, if the girl is configured for a serious relationship, then in this case it is better to show patience and endurance and wait for his letter. If it does not follow, it means that the guy does not consider the girl as his potential companion, and then it is not worth writing.
And thirdly, if the girl understands that she still writes, because she cannot remain in the unknown longer, then there is no need to do this in a burn. It is better to think through all your actions and build them in a sequential plan, providing for possible options for the development of events. So much more chances to achieve success in relations with a guy.

Should a girl write first if she liked a man?

In principle, there is nothing wrong with that. If a girl cannot decide on a call to a man who attracted her attention, she may well send him an SMS or a message on a social network.
And she will be sure that her message is read, and then she will be able to understand whether it is worth continuing. If the guy does not answer, you should not insist. Since, the reasons why he is silent is unknown. Perhaps he is busy, and then he accurately answer after some time. If there is no answer for several days, it is better to switch your attention to another man.
At the same time, the girl should remember that by writing the message first, she takes on not only the initiative in building relationships, but also a certain responsibility for them.

Should a girl write first if a man suddenly stopped writing to her?

The girl, of course, can write the first, if she is well familiar with the guy and meets or is a correspondence for a long time, and he suddenly fell silent. At the same time, it is important to observe a sense of proportion and tact, respecting the personal freedom of another person.
You should not throw it with messages. After asking a week or two of his silence, an unobtrusive question: “How are you? Are you doing well? ”, You just need to wait for the guy's reaction. If he explains the reason, whatever it is: a passion for another, problems, illness, etc., the girl will not be tormented by the unknown.
If he will be silent further - well, most likely, he really does not want to continue communication.

How to write the first to the guy?

If the girl decided that she would write first, it is important making your message correctly, competently and easyso that it makes it possible to maintain an easy and relaxed dialogue.
You should not use hidden cliches, template phrases - they make an unpleasant impression, and the guy can make an idea of \u200b\u200bthe girl as a limited personality.
It is necessary to make efforts and try to interest a young man a topic that would be interesting to him And which the girl could easily maintain during further communication.
The need is not discussed literacy. If the girl is not sure that she writes without errors, she should use dictionaries, spelling verification programs, etc. Let the spelling of such a message take more time, but the man does not have the impression of the interlocutor as an illiterate and uninteresting person. In addition, the incorrectly compiled proposal can generally distort the meaning of the message, and then the man will not understand what is at stake, or, worse, he will understand it vice versa.
For the first message, you should also not use emoticons, use Caps Lock. Until it becomes clear in what style the man communicates - it should be written simply and restrained. If the correspondence develops, then it will be possible to gradually use the additional capabilities of electronic communication.

Is it the first to write to the girl: conclusion

Summarizing all of the above, we can come to the conclusion that there is no universal advice: write or not write first. It all depends on the situation, on the stage at which there are relationships, the reasons why the guy does not write, etc.
Once Tatyana Larina violated the generally accepted rules and dared to write Onegin first. This act unheard of at that time today is not in surprise, and even more so - censure. Therefore, any girl has the right to act as she herself considers necessary.

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