When a wife becomes a mother for her husband: signs. How to stop being a mommy for her husband: Instructions

From this article you will find out what to do to stop being a mommy for her husband.

A wife for a husband in life should be a friend and partner, but very often for some reason, relationships flow into a slightly different direction-“mother-child”. Of course, it is very tempting to patronize and take care of her husband. And not even the fact that he cannot do anything himself, it is simply easier to be the main thing. Indeed, otherwise you will have to live in an equal relationship without a struggle for leadership. So in the struggle for leadership, a woman chooses precisely the tactics of the “mother-child”.

After all, mom is always the main thing and she decides what and how to do. She can also punish. In this case, the most important thing is lost in the relationship - the woman forgets why she chose this particular man. To get rid of such a model of relations will have to be very happy.

When a wife becomes a mother for her husband: signs

Before you understand how to stop being a mother for her husband, it is important to understand at what point your relationship is turning on this rut, because not always women consciously approach such a model of behavior.

So, you can determine that you become a mommy for your husband by several signs:

• You are in a hurry to help at his first request, forgetting about your affairs. Probably, such requests for him appear from childhood and his mother was used to helping him. Now you are doing the same. Believe me, he himself will cope with the search for socks, cooking tea, or heated dinner.
• You take a solution to problems for yourself. This is the biggest mistake. Perhaps it is customary to set the table in your family and feed your husband, but let it be limited to this. If women can learn to score nails, then men can learn to iron or sew. Distribute house responsibilities and let the man fulfill them himself. Without your control!
• You take care of it on trifles, lick and always try to cheer up. In no case do nothing for him. You can only help with advice if you can’t completely leave the situation to control it, but do not even control it yourself.
• When it seems to you, or he does something wrong, you help or even do everything yourself. Remember that a man should be independent.
• You indulge all his weaknesses and justify when he behaves irresponsibly. For example, he did not buy food for dinner. No need to run to the store. Prepare what is, even if it is tea with bread.
• He is flattered by you, and you bribe. Moreover, you always regret him, but this is clearly not to wait for this. Never spare a man, it’s better to just respect.

By the way, when you stop nursing your man, he will be very surprised at this. You can even start scandals or even worse - manipulations to break you to the old model of behavior. Of course, the man is rebelled and will put pressure on pity. In other words, he will try to express a protest in every way. And at some point you will definitely want to give up, because it is difficult to get rid of the habit.

The longer you stayed in the role of mom, the more difficult it will be. The main thing is to hold on. Gradually, the man will understand that the changes are not temporary and he will not have anything to accept this. According to psychology, the period of changes is about six weeks.

Read also: A simple way to understand how significant you are for a man

She became a mother for her husband: what to do?

When you understand that you need to solve the issue - how to stop being a mother for a husband, then remember that you are an adult woman. You can well control your feelings and behavior.

Of course, it is always easier to be offended or quarrel that some business has not been done. That's just a marriage relationship is a partnership. You are both equal, and therefore learn to negotiate. No matter how much you would like to quarrel, restrain yourself. Adults do so.

To finally become an adult, and you did not have to control and patronize him, you will have to, as we have already said. It is important to gradually move away from an independent solution to all problems and transfer some of them to a man.

Be sure, it will not be easy. You will face great resistance in your path, but if you do not want to part with your beloved man, you should go for it.

How to stop being a mommy for her husband: Instructions

So, you are going to solve the question of how to stop being a mother for your husband and do not know where to start? Our instruction will help you in solving the problem. The main thing, do not doubt your own abilities.

• Message

To begin with, think about what message you give to your husband when you express your readiness to save on the necessary things. For example, he offers to buy something expensive and promises to earn money, and you say that you believe in it, but it is better to take something cheaper, otherwise you will not be able to earn money. That is, you say something like-"... or earn more, but I do not need anything, I'm not mercantile." Decide. Either you want prosperity and prosperity or you will arrange a paradise in a hut, well, then do not complain that there is nothing to pay for the apartment.

• Control and custody

To stop being a mother’s husband, it is important to exclude control and custody of your part. He is not obliged to tell you every step. Accept for granted that some decisions can make some decisions without you.

• Do not rush to help

This is especially true for difficult situations. Let the man himself solve the question of him to be a man.

• Make it the main thing

Many women want the man to be the main thing and solve all the problems. And suddenly the husband declares what the car wants and what the woman does? She begins to talk about numerous “and if ...” he cannot cope, she will not be able to and so on.

• Mergers

If you always talk about you with a partner as “we”, for example, we were fired, we spent the last money, and so on, then this position will not lead to anything good. Your marriage is far from affiliate, because your husband is an individual person and he took responsibility, and therefore it will be inappropriate to say every time “we”.

• Love yourself

Do not be selfish, but healthy love for yourself is quite normal. Do not be afraid to spend money on yourself. Many people think it is difficult. But in fact, the main thing is to support her husband, to believe in his abilities and motivate.

Read also: The secrets of the psychology of the right relationship between a man and a woman for happiness and mutual understanding

How not to become a husband mom: a psychologist's advice

In order to prevent a situation when you have to solve the issue of how to stop being a mother for her husband, it is better to immediately prevent such a situation.

So, there are some tips that will help you not make a son from a man:

• Never do what he himself can do for him
• Do not take care of it for every little thing
• He must be responsible for his actions. Do not regret him and indulge every weakness
• Never grumble, and even more so do not saw
• Never doubt it. He can do everything and let him not succeed as you imagine, the main thing is that he does it himself
• Show him that you are a weak woman and always ask for help. He must see that you cannot do without him
• Realize yourself that you are a wife, not a mother for your husband

Video: if you are for your husband mother | How to stop being a mother in a relationship?

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