How to choose from two men: tips and recommendations of psychologists, test

Many articles have been written about the problem of female loneliness, but sometimes there is an opposite situation when the young ladies have two applicants for her hand and heart in life. And since both are worthy candidates, she cannot determine which of them suits her better, it is always not easy to make a choice, but sooner or later, if a woman is focused on creating a family, she will have to make her choice.

If you are completely confused and cannot figure out your feelings, our article will help you decide on relationships and choose a man out of two.

How to choose between two men: why does this situation arise?

• Many believe that relations with two men Only a licentious woman can appear. Indeed, there are some ladies who consciously start two gentlemen. They explain this by the fact that individually, none of them can completely satisfy all the needs.
• In such cases, as a rule, one man helps a woman financially, and with the second she finds harmony in a mental or sexual plan.

But sometimes the situation in which a woman is forced to choose from two men can be caused by other circumstances:

• The girl meets a man for a long time. She loves him, and relations with him suit her. However, for some reason, he is in no hurry to make her an offer. And suddenly the girl meets another young man who is ready to marry her at least tomorrow. And although feelings for a longtime partner are strong enough, she is covered by doubts, and suddenly he will not offer her to get married. And the years go. So the young lady is tormented by the fact that he cannot determine what to do and which of the guys to choose.
• The woman broke up with her young man and began to meet another. However, after some time, the former partner appears in her life and offers to renew the relationship, assuring that he understood and realized everything. In this case, a woman may be confused, with whom she should stay now. Past relationships may seem very tempting, as former partners studied each other quite closely. In addition, people are often inclined to idealize the past connection, because over time the negativity is forgotten, but only pleasant moments are remembered.
• While new relationships are always associated with some tension. After all, it is not known how to behave with a new person, you need to recognize and get used to his character and lifestyle. According to psychologists, if a woman has doubts whether to return to the former partner, then she still experiences feelings for him and did not let go of past relationship.
• There is no need to justify the situation by the fact that it is a man does not want to lag behind the former partner. In fact, the decision remains with the woman. And if she firmly says “no”, then the man will not insist. Perhaps she is simply not ready to create a new relationship, and therefore the old ones seem attractive to her.
• The woman met two men at about the same time (for example, on a dating site). Both seem to her very worthy candidates, so she does not know who to opt for. Perhaps it is difficult for a woman to do this because she does not fully understand what qualities of a man are important to her, and what she wants from her relationship.

• The second man appears in the life of a woman at a time when she is experiencing a crisis in a relationship. Basically, this situation happens in married lady. The lover brings romance and a feeling of lightness to the life of the lady, when there are no offenses, mutual claims and misunderstanding. An unusual relationship completely fills the life of a woman, and she begins to idealize a new man, and even compare with her husband. Such a “tango three” can last years, tormenting and exhausting all the participants of such a “triangle”.

There is an opinion that if a woman has doubts about which man to choose from two, then she is not completely sure of any of them.

• Although it may be quite likely that both candidates are very worthy people and therefore the process of choice seems so difficult for the girl.

How to choose from two men?

• In order to understand with what man to continue relations, and with whom to part, you need to ask yourself not about who you like more, but about who suits you more.
• Indeed, in addition to mutual attraction, it is necessary to take into account other factors that are important for building long -term strong relations.
• It is reasonable to choose a partner who will share your views and lifestyle.

If a woman chooses between two men, the following recommendations will help to understand this issue:

• Write on a sheet of paper what you want to see your relationship with a man. Describe your wishes as specifically and in detail. You can characterize them as follows: sex, stability, romance, security, fun pastime. Which of these factors are in the first place for you? A detailed analysis will help you understand yourself and realize what you want from life in general and from a partner in particular.
• Make it list of male qualitieswhich you think mandatory for building prosperous harmonious relations. Also determine what you categorically do not want to see in your life partner.
• On separate sheets of paper, write out the character traits that both of your men possess. Assessing them, be as objective and impartial as possible. Describe the moral qualities of the gentlemen, the level of their education.

• Try to recognize the main values \u200b\u200band life priorities of men: What each of them strives for, how ambitious is, is it capable of growing and developing. If possible, learn about your family of your candidates. What relationships are accepted there between father and mother. With a high probability, your future marriage will be built in the likeness of the spouse's family.
• Compare the lists of characteristics of the character of both gentlemen with your list of mandatory qualities of the “ideal” man. Opposite the points where you find the coincidences, put a plus. And then calculate the number of advantages in each of the lists.

How to choose between two men: Psychology

When making a choice between two men, psychologists recommend that you be guided by the following criteria:

• Determine how you feel about each of your gentlemen. Write down all the feelings that they cause you. Listen to yourself and realize how you feel next to them. What specific emotions do you experience in the presence of your men: joy and self -confidence or, conversely, embarrassed and feel awkward.
• Using adjectives, describe the relationship with each of them. Evaluate the psychological maturity of men, the possibility of their personal development, your compatibility with them. And which of them is easier to find a common language with your relatives and friends? Think about what you like most in your fans. Also consider how each of them excites you. After all, physical attraction is an important side of harmonious relations.
• Think which of the two men helps you to become better and pushes you to further development. For whom do you want to be the best version of yourself? Which of the two gentlemen makes your life more interesting and brighter. Ask yourself a question: “Am I ready to live with this person all my life?”
• Determine the negative aspects of each applicant. Write down all the qualities that do not suit you in them. Please note whether there are serious disadvantages in men. After all, the character has been formed for years, and it is almost impossible to change it. Namely, he is the foundation of the personality.
• Do not think that over time you can get used to what annoys you now. Also list all the bad habits of candidates. Keep in mind that pernicious habits control the life of a person and his loved ones. Think about which of them you are able to close your eyes and come to terms. Determine those that are unacceptable to you, and you cannot allow them in your partner.
• Pay attention to the circle of communication of each gentleman. After all, it is known that any person is somewhat similar to their friends. And if you do not like the environment of one of the men, this is a serious reason to think. Do not console yourself with the fact that he is not like his friends.
• Is there a difficult past left behind the candidates? Think about how it can affect your life together in the future. This moment is very important. A man can have remarkable qualities, but the problems that stretch after him from a past life can adversely affect your relationship, selecting a lot of energy and nerves from you.

• Observe how each of the men treats you,what do they do for you, how much the time spent with you, where are you in their list of priorities. Do not think that over the years, one of the men may change. This happens extremely rarely. Therefore, evaluate partners based on who they are now, and not from what they can be allegedly in the future. Ask yourself how your life will change if any of the two boyfriends disappears from it.
• Determine how your views, life guidelines, goals and desires coincide. Find out what kind of man you are closer to you. It is much easier to build harmonious relations with a person who shares your worldview. And if you do not coincide with one of the candidates in your preferences, it is better to part with him, even if bright feelings are raging between you.
• The eternal confrontation of interests will eventually lead to misunderstanding and conflicts. And a constant search for compromises, in the end, tires both. But common values \u200b\u200bhelp reduce the stress that occurs from time to time in relationships, and also prevent quarrels if the opinions of spouses in some matters do not coincide.
• Before making a decision that can become fateful for you, study all the information well. A thorough analysis will help you direct your interest in one young man. However, in the process of choosing between two men, one should not refuse their own intuition. In heart matters, it seems very prudent to trust her.

• Also consider your previous experience. In other words, do not repeat the previous mistakes. If in the past you had unsuccessful relationships, remember the reasons that served their unfortunate completion. Take a closer look at your current gentlemen. Does any of them have those qualities that did not suit you in a former partner.
• We advise you not to delay the choice for too long. When you make a decision in favor of one of the men, and then he finds out that you have met with another in parallel, his reaction can be very negative. Most of the stronger sex regarding a woman’s behavior as treason and betrayal.
• Well, if after a thorough analysis you could not decide on the choice, since both candidates were good, then choose the one who appeared in your life the last. After all, if the first man would have arranged you completely, then the second would have no chance to attract your attention.

How to choose between two men: Test

If you think how to choose from two men, we advise you to go through this test:

1. Does your partner have bad habits?
2. Does your partner have a habit of expressing obscene?
3. Is there a goal in a man’s life?
4. Is flirting in a man with other girls?
5. Can a partner change you?
6. Do you feel protected with a partner?
7. Does he listen to the advice of his parents?
8. Do you often hear tender words from a man?
9. Do you like your man's appearance?
10. Is the partner good sense of humor?
11. Does man love children and animals?
12. Does the man regret the money for you?
13. Is it developed versatile?
14. Does he hug you?
15. Can a man refuse help?
16. Does he spend your free time with you?
17. Do you feel positive emotions from your partner's arms?
18. Is the partner jealous of you?
19. Does the partner control your actions?
20. Does your partner stimulate your development?

Answer yes or not in relation to each partner? Now you should pay more attention to a man who got more advantages - that is, more answers yes.

How to choose from two men alone: \u200b\u200btips

• In the event that you did not give any of the men any promises, and there is no feeling that you are changing to any of them, do not rush to make a decision. Take a break and watch both gentlemen, listening to your own feelings.
• Sometimes time works for us and puts everything in its places much more effective than ourselves. Perhaps one of the candidates with their actions (good or bad) will facilitate your choice, and everything will be resolved by itself.
• In addition, when a woman cannot finally choose between two men, It is likely that she does not experience strong feelings for any of them. So, perhaps, you should not rush to solve something? It is likely that you just have not yet met your soul mate.
• Well, if you are very tormented by the need to choose one man out of two, And one of them also rushes you with this process, all the more you do not need to rush. Maybe you need to leave them both and find someone else. And the new man will satisfy your needs completely, and relations with him will be more harmonious.

• Having made the final decision, do not depart from it. Be prepared to meet only one man.
• If you feel guilty due to the fact that you refused another gentleman, calm down and do not reproach yourself. Measure with the fact that someone alone will be painful in any case. You can’t please everyone, and you will have to offend someone.
• When the question is about your own future, you need to gain courage and refuse one of the applicants. Do not forget that you have only one life. And you have every right to live it as you want and with whom you want.
• When determining which of the two candidates to stay, take into account the following circumstance. There is no complete guarantee that you will make your choice correctly, and the man with whom you decide to maintain a relationship will make you happy. To calculate in advance which of the two options will be the most favorable for you is impossible in principle. But there is no need to be afraid to make a mistake. The main thing is to draw conclusions from the mistakes made and not repeat them from now on.
• Of course, there is another way to solve the problem, the easiest. You can just leave everything as it is, and continue to meet with both men.
• However, it is much more correct after all show courage and make a decision. Believe me, it is better to get some result than to continue painful thoughts, which of the two men to choose.
• Full -fledged relations involving mutual respect and trust of partners, Exclude the presence of a third party.

Useful articles about relationships on our website:

• Whether to give a second chance to a man, husband after treason, friend
• 17 reasons to quit a man, even if he swears love
• Why does the husband manipulate divorce all the time
• Divorce conspiracy with her husband - when and how to do
• How to survive a heavy divorce for a woman

Video: How to choose between two guys?