How to determine whether a man loves or uses: 12 signs, we determine by behavior, why does he use? The husband loves or uses his wife: how to understand?

If you do not have a soul in your beloved, and his behavior makes you doubt, analyze it - perhaps he uses you.

Often, women tend to endow their next fan with feelings that he does not experience, and qualities that are not inherent in him. This is especially common in cases where the new gentleman speaks beautifully and gallantly cares. But sometimes, the tricky and skillful tricks of an experienced manipulator are hidden behind the picturesque gestures and sweet speeches.

Using is a relationship in which one partner only takes, without giving anything in return. That is, he is only interested in satisfying his own needs.

How to determine, a man loves or uses: 12 signs

A man can use his lady, pursuing a variety of goals:

• Available sex.
• Monetary help.
• Her connection in society.
• The opportunity to advance on the career ladder.
• Household amenities (when a man lives in a partner’s apartment or she takes care of all the house and turns into a free housekeeper).

How to understand, your a man loves or uses you? It is extremely important to determine this, and as early as possible. This will allow you not to waste your precious time and effort on an individual who does not value you at all, but only plays your feelings.

Of course, every man has his own character, temperament and knowledge of the rules of etiquette. However, there is a general trend in which you can determine whether a man loves or uses.

We list 12 basic signs that a man does not like, but uses:

1. Indifference to your problems. If a man prefers to meet with you only when everything is fine in your life, and refuses your help and support when you need it - this is a clear sign that your difficulties and problems are not interested in, that a man does not love, and Uses. A person to whom you are dear will always help you and will be near in difficult moments.
2. Sudden disappearance and equally sudden return. The gentleman without warning disappears from your life, does not answer your calls and messages, and then after a few days, as if nothing had happened, he is again. At the same time, he finds a lot of respectful reasons justifying his behavior. And it can even be offended if you suddenly begin to blame him. If such disappearance of a man is regular, think about whether you need such an unreliable person.
3. Failure to fulfill these promises. The gentleman promises you the golden mountains, but does not fulfill even the simplest obligations. He just deceives you, as they say, "hangs noodles on his ears." Such a person cannot be trusted, and it is unlikely that it will be possible to build normal relations with him.
4. A man does not hide his bad mood and irritability in your presence. Of course, situations are different, and in the life of each person a difficult period happens when there is no strength to pretend that you have fun. However, if a man on dates is always in a critical mood and does not try to hide his irritation, then he does not care how you feel about this and what you think on this occasion. Some girls explain the rudeness of his beloved fatigue. However, you should not be deceived on this subject - a man does not like, but uses you for his own purposes.
5. Unwillingness to introduce you to your friends. If a man needs a woman only for certain purposes (for example, for sex), he will keep a distance, and will not introduce her into the circle of people dear to him. What for? After all, he does not need close relations with her. Do not justify this circumstance by the fact that you have not been met for a very long time. A man does not need a lot of time to decide how much he likes the woman to let her into his life.
6. Persistent calls for sex. Has you ended very quickly? The young man stopped giving signs of attention, but only hints too stubbornly at the bed? So, you only interest him sexually, he does not like, but uses you. And also a similar attitude can say how you spend your joint time. Do you often get out with your fan in people? Do you go to the cinema, to exhibitions, to the cafe? Or do you only spend all your free time at home in bed?

   

7. Flirt with other girls. The man is not shy about flirting and flirting with other young ladies in the presence of his passion, and his pages on social networks are full of messages from numerous Internet contractions. He claims that he is a free person, and there is nothing reprehensible in his behavior. In fact, he is simply indifferent to what you feel at the same time, and how unpleasant it is for you.
8. Constant financial difficulties. If a man uses you for mercantile purposes, he will regularly ask you to replenish your account on the phone, pay for dinner in a cafe, borrow small (or large) amounts of money. At the same time, the reasons will come up with the most diverse: I forgot the card at home, delay the salary in the company, broke the car and the money went to its repair and the like. Check the boyfriend - refuse to pay for it. If in response he begins to be annoyed, then this means that a man does not love, but uses.
9. Extraordinary "employment". The young man meets with you only on weekdays, and on weekends refuses to date under the pretext of many cases. There is a reason to think seriously. It is likely that a man meets with you only when he does not plan anything more interesting. And he spends the weekend at various entertainment events, where he is well and without you. Another negligent reason is possible - your boyfriend is marriage, and spends the weekend with his wife and children.
10. Unwillingness to leave you on your territory. Did they stay in the house of their man to spend the night? Or after sex, he immediately sends you home? This is a serious reason to doubt the sincerity of his feelings. After all, a man allows you to spend the night in his house only to the person who is completely sure.

    

11. Secrecy and excessive mystery. The young man is surrounded by various secrets and riddles. He does not tell anything about himself, but to the most innocent questions about work or his family, clearly evades the answer and transfers the conversation to another topic. If he is called to his mobile phone in your presence, he looks who calls, but does not answer. A worthy man, configured for a serious relationship, will not hide anything from his beloved.
12. An indifferent attitude to your desires and preferences. Think about whether you often choose for joint viewing the film that he wants to see, not you. Or order in a restaurant those dishes that he likes, not you. If the situation is familiar, then this means that a man does not love, but uses, and you are indifferent to him. A loving person will definitely try to remember what wine or ice cream you like, what is your relationship with colleagues, what project you are working on now. But if a man meets with you only with the aim of using, then he will not score his head with such things and be interested in what is important to you.

A man loves or uses: how to understand by behavior?

In addition to the main listed features, there are not so obvious behavior features that indicate that a man does not strive for serious relationships. After reading, we hope that you will become clearer a man loves or uses.

• He does not plan your joint future. Talking about further life plans cause him irritation. If you have met for a long time, but have not advanced in your relationship, then most likely you are temporary option for him.
• Unsultural behavior. The gentleman does not follow his manners and speech: he uses swear words, does not consider it necessary to give a hand, open the door in front of you, help remove the coat. All these are signs that a man does not even try to look better in your eyes. So, he is not interested in your relationship. When a man is interested in a woman, he shows gallantry and tries to demonstrate his best sides. A loving person will not be shy of manifestations of his feelings in relation to you. Even in the company of friends and relatives, he will look at you with tenderness and provide signs of attention.
• Preaching "free love." A man meets, and sometimes even lives with a woman for a long time, but refuses to officially formalize a relationship. At the same time, the arguments gives the most diverse: “the stamp does not change anything”, “now other times”, “love does not need official confirmation”, “we love each other”, etc. In fact, such an instance was simply conveniently settled, receiving regular sex and female attention without any responsibility on his part. He believes that you can live with a girl for many years and it is not necessary to marry her at all, and when you get tired, you can easily and just part.

• Indifference to your interests. This can be determined by his behavior: when you start talking about yourself, about your work or what is important to you, the gentleman begins to miss or transfers the conversation to another topic. This means that he will never be interested in what you want, whether you are comfortable in a relationship with him. A loving man will not think only about his own well -being. He will always take care of whether it is convenient for his woman, how she feels and what needs to be done to give her pleasure.
• Greed. The man who is the road of his lady does not spare money for her: he buys flowers, cute trinkets, leads to a cafe or theater. But if he does not want to spend his money on you, it is likely that he does not consider relations with you as long -term.

If you notice alarming signs in the behavior of your young man, evaluate the situation soberly. Do not tolerate a neglect of yourself. Evaluate not the beautiful speeches of the fan, but his actions. It is they who demonstrate how your a man - loves or uses.

The husband loves or uses his wife: how to understand?

Often, a woman herself at a certain stage of relations assigns a large burden of duties. Over time, her spouse begins to treat this as proper, stops appreciating her efforts and uses to the whole coil. At the same time, he himself does not want to make any important decisions, do something for the family, and take responsibility. The man gets used to the fact that his wife does all these things for him.

In harmonious relationships, a woman and a man invest strength and energy on an equal footing. But if only one side invests in a relationship, then we are talking about use.

The main signs that a man does not like, but uses:

• Manipulation, when the spouse uses blackmail or threats to get what he wants. And the wife is forced to do what her noble wants. It is important to understand that it is dangerous not manipulation in itself, but that it is with the help of this manipulation that a man tries to impose on a woman.
• Alternation periods of indifferent and cold relations with warm and tender. At the same time, sometimes a man explains what exactly he was offended, and sometimes does not consider it necessary to do this. The wife begins to get lost in conjecture and worry a lot. And the husband simply plays his wife's feelings so that she always feels guilty and pleases him. The use in this case lies in the fact that the woman, being in a state of waiting for the “warm” period, tries to establish relationships, performing whims of her half.
• Attitude to his wife as property. The husband demands from her in everything a report, takes a salary, does not allow to communicate with friends. Believe me, the point here is not that he loves very much and is jealous of his half. It’s just that such a man is sure that his wife is obliged to fulfill his desires and whims exclusively.
• Constant groundless criticism. This is the right way to underestimate her self -esteem in a woman. Often a man applies this method to assert himself at the expense of his spouse, to feel like her background smarter and more talented. And in order to impose on a woman her own life concepts and principles (especially if she does not initially share them).
• Unwillingness to work. Two options are possible here. In the first case, a man simply does not work or regularly changes the place of service (often leaves, cannot find work in the specialty, etc.) and sits on his wife’s neck. In the second case, he works for the simplest and most easy work, where he earns a penny, and does not want to learn something new in order to occupy a more paid position.

• Lack of help. The man is firmly convinced that the woman’s task is to wash, clean and feed her husband. He does not help his wife around the house, does not go shopping, does not meet from work. He simply uses it as a servant. A loving man will never refuse to help his wife’s housework: get out in the apartment, go for groceries, wash dishes.

Why doesn't a man like, but uses a woman?

Female psychology is very different from the male. For the most part, ladies are firmly convinced that when you love a person, it cannot be used. And they mistakenly believe that men think in the same way. However, the male gender wants by its nature, and most importantly, he knows how to use the gender weak.

For relations, both parties are responsible for the participants. It's a shame to be aware, but if a man uses you, then you yourself allowed him this. Perhaps you simply do not realize how you give a message to your partner to use you.

A few main reasons why a woman allows a man to use herself:

• A woman cannot defend her own boundaries due to low self-esteem.
• The lady too clearly shows how much she depends on the relationship with her partner.
• A woman who has been alone for a long time, so longs for personal happiness that she often agrees to relationships in which she does not even understand a man loves or uses her.
• The young lady gives its beloved not entirely inherent qualities. Then she begins to believe that she came up with herself, and clings to the relationship, sometimes painful for her.

The listed female types with all their might try to fulfill all the whims of their partner, hoping to tie him stronger to themselves. Men see this and willingly accept the rules of the game. After all, it is impossible to use a woman who is not needed.

However, life with a person who does not love you, but uses, does not bring anything good. Sooner or later, the realization that years have passed, but you never saw happiness.

What to do so that the man does not use you:

• Clearly dose what you give in a relationship, and demand something in return from a man. Do not believe the promises. He must do it now, and not in a distant and obscure future.
• Never give a man to a man and pay for him anywhere.
• Appreciate yourself. If something does not suit you in a relationship, clearly and clearly explain to your man what exactly. Perhaps he will think, and the situation will change.
• Do not be always available to him. At times, refrain from sex and see how your young man will react to this.

Think and be honest with yourself. Are you comfortable in a relationship with your partner? Do you feel happy? If you can’t answer positively, then, then, it's time to change something in your life. Sometimes loneliness is a much better option than toxic relationships.

If you find out that a man does not love you, but only uses you, no matter how difficult it may be, it is better to part with him. And the sooner you make this decision, the faster and easier you survive the gap. Believe me, you will find the strength to move on, and be sure to meet your true love.

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