What is the difference in the upbringing of a girl and a boy? How to educate a boy and a girl

Tips for psychologists on the general educational process of children.

The process of raising children is very complex and meaningful. The general principles of the educational process are aimed at the methods, content and organization of this process. It is very important for parents to choose the optimal education system for their child. Given his personality. There are no ready -made recipes for education. There are general requirements for the principles of the education process:

• mandatory is not educational words, but the real application of principles in life
• complexity - all principles are applied simultaneously
• equalness - there are no priority and secondary principles, they all have an equivalent right to use

Having basic concepts about the general requirements for the principles of education, parents need to develop their own approaches.

Tips for mothers for raising children

• We love the child, just like that, because he is
• We do not beat, do not punish the baby. This gives rise to fear and self -doubt
• Trust the child. The child should not only listen to the words of love, but also find confirmation in this. Distrust gives rise to deception
• We communicate on an equal footing, do not lick. In this case, you should go down to the level of understanding of the child
• When communicating with the child, sit down. Mom and baby should look at each other at the same level of height
• We praise the baby, even for the very trifle. Justify what we praise for
• We caress, hug the child at every opportunity, in moments when he is ready to accept your affection
• We accept any proposed assistance. Even if the baby is completely crumbling and he himself cannot cope yet
• Respect our baby. This is a mutual process. Relating the child, he will respect you
• We teach the child to say that he is tormented. We bring to the child that the same thing happened to you in childhood. This will help get rid of many children's fears
• Do not combine an attitude towards a child with his actions
• Do not refuse the child to help. Explain to him what he can cope with, and with what with your help
• We take the side of the child in conflict with strangers. If he is wrong, we are not right about this at home in private
• Teach the child to put things in order from the smallest years. By the age of seven, it will be difficult to do
• We are not afraid to ask for forgiveness from a child if he is offended by you. Thus, parents and children come closer
• We communicate with the child in confidential and even tone. We are not afraid to show fair severity
• We teach the child to express his opinion, reason, ask questions. Developed sociability in the baby
• Do not compare your baby with other children. Love him as he is
• We teach children to independence. Let the child make decisions himself, take the initiative for himself, make a choice
• We bring to the child the opportunity to change something in his life, if he is unhappy with something
• We make decisions on household issues of your family together with the child
• Carefully and carefully give instructions to your children. Parents' tips are laid down a certain program in a child for life. They will help or slow down its success depends on the quality of these tips

Future woman or how to educate a girl?

• Raising the girl it is important to understand as soon as possible that you are raising a future woman. Grow a girl in the modern world, a difficult task
• As a result of the war for equality, women won. But they missed their positions. Female naivety, innocence, purity and complaisance disappeared
• Therefore, the question of what to target education: on professional achievements or to create a family? What features to encourage, and which to try to muffle? Parents will have to decide. For this, you need to clearly understand what the result of education should be, although very distant

Several general nuances for the successful education of girls:

• Maternal love is just for being. Paternal admiration for daughter, as a future woman. All this form the child’s trust in the world. Hence the self -esteem, self -sufficiency. A girl who grew up in an atmosphere of love will instinctively avoid another environment. This is the key to her personal happiness
• Learning the baby to love yourself. Small girls are sensitive to praise. We praise the girl for actions, for knowledge. We convince her beauty, no matter how external data her nature rewards. Doubts about my attractiveness over time I can become a source of complexes and failures in my personal life
• A little lady very quickly grasps everything and knows how to achieve her. If you manipulate your daughter to get obedience: "I'm very scared when you jump from a chair." Get ready for the fact that Khitrul will immediately repeat your maneuver. She will say that she is very scared if mom does not allow watching TV. This is good: the future woman should be able to manipulate people. Explain to her that her trick can be a different reaction. Disassemble and insisting on their own opinion
• We teach my daughter to restore order. Girls love to clean and add things, to be neat. This is a natural gift for girls. And if this desire is skillfully cultivated in them, in the future there will be no problems with the order

It is advisable to educate the girl:

Politeness

This is the main virtue of a real woman. To be able to be restrained and educated in an extreme situation is exceptional skill. Something is given to the girl by nature. But the rest needs to be practiced since childhood. We practice saying magical words. And then we teach the child in practice, by our example

Mutual respect

• Important quality for a real woman is to respect and be respected. We forbid the girl to be rude. We explain how the evil words of people are offended
• We teach my daughter to appreciate the merits of others
• We help to say my emotions to her: "I'm angry, I am offended by ...". It should be explained here what was angry and offended. This is not easy - not all adults know how to express their emotions with dignity

Sophistication

• Developing a delicate taste is both easy and not easy. In the matter of good taste, it all depends on the mother. If parents have an exquisite taste, then it is possible to develop it to develop it
• Buy new things together. Try to take stylish and brands. If there is no way to take quality things constantly, you can occasionally pamper your favorite. We draw the attention of the daughter to the fashionable style
• We debate together what is worth to wear, which is not worth it
• We help the girl choose what suits her. We do not impose our opinion.
• The task of parents to recognize individuality and contribute to the development of the child’s personality. Do not try to sculpt your dream out of it

How to raise a girl without a father?

• A girl without a dad can be educated in different ways. For her daughter, it is very important how mother relates to her father. Father, regardless of desire, participates in the upbringing of his daughter, through the prism of relations with the mother of their child raising them
• If the daughter, raised without dad, sees her mother happy and consisted without father. Living a full life. If mom talks about the father positively. The reason for the rupture of the relationship of parents is accepted with all their hearts. Such a girl may not be at all from the others brought up by the fathers
• If this is not so, it is very difficult for a girl growing in a full family in the future to build relationships with men. This is manifested in excessive modesty, and maybe vice versa in the hyper of sexuality. After all, before the eyes there is no sample of the correct relationship between people of the opposite sex
• And do not scold my daughter. Such a girl needs to help rethink the mother’s mother's image. This gives her the opportunity not to convey to her daughter the burden of the negative female stereotype

How to raise a teenage girl?

There are some features when educating a girlfriend of adolescence:

• During the transition period in children, the appearance changes. This is especially important for girls. We try to be very correct with comments. So as not to injure the thin psyche of a teenage girl
• Irritability, insolence, disobedience. The girl may appear on the skin of acne, the structure and color of the hair will change. You can’t leave all this without control. The girl may begin to be shy and close in herself. Attract your daughter to sports, music, dancing. Interest it as much as possible with different circles, additional formations. Let's participate in competitions, competitions
• If you have an authority for the child before the transition period. This period will not be difficult to survive the big problems. If you have not found contact with your daughter before, it is unlikely that this will turn out in the teenage period. The child will probably completely fall out of control. Do not try to praise the girl, but do not overdo it with reproaches. Follow harmony. Instill a certain model of behavior in a friendly manner, without pressure
• We teach a teenage girl to personal hygiene. This includes not only a shower, but also the care of the skin of the face and body. Cleaning cosmetics from the face
• We select makeup together. A new hairstyle. After all, she is now very "adult"
• We prepare the girl for menstruation. Explain the principle of the occurrence of menstruation
• We talk about methods of contraception
• We teach good tones lessons. The best lesson is you yourself. If you are polite and good -natured, your child will learn this rule without words. If you are bold and rude, the child will communicate like you
  In the transition period, it is especially important for her daughter not just a mother, but a girlfriend. Close native and affordable. So that at any time the daughter could run and whispered about her new discoveries. Then this period will pass for parents and children easily, calmly and not noticeable

How to raise a man from a boy?

The question of how to educate a man from a boy is concerned not only to single mothers, but also a family where there is a mother and father. The positive role of a man in the family is very important. The son will strive to be like his father, imitate him.

If mother is proud and praises her husband, then the son will strive to be like him. If the mother scolds and humiliates a man, an notorious, not confident, never become a real man, a male man will grow up.

Tips for a psychologist for raising a boy

• It is necessary to look from the side of the mothers how father and son walk on the street. He does not run headlong from the place where the child fell. Not screaming. And calmly gives the child on his own, time after time to learn to overcome the ill -fated obstacle. Father does not prevent the child from playing mischievous games, on the contrary, supports
• It is very important for mom to learn from her father in what you can give in to the boy, and what you need to insist on your own. After all, the father was once a boy. The obvious fact of fathers is easier to cope with boys than mothers
• It is very important for a small baby to encourage endurance. If the boy fell, hit and did not cry, his mother praises him, but that he does not cry. And he does not put an alternative that he is a man and he should not cry. This is an important emphasis. Correctly need to educate endurance. Otherwise, the child simply does not want to be a man, since he is not pity
• In the conversation, say the word "boy" connecting with the concept of "brave" and "good." From childhood, these strong male associations are laid out at the subconscious level
• At the age of three, purchase more cars, pistols. Take not very bright girlfriends. Do not let the hard virtual scenes watch
• Play firefighters, rescuers, captains
• At the age of five, we teach the child to make a child. We give him the opportunity to score nails, saw, suppress the instruments for dad at home work
• Active games are very important for boys. Let them guide and run, express their energy and activity
• We teach the boy good manners: let him give way to women and older people. Says »Please", "Thank you"
• We teach his son to order: teach him to remove him, wash dishes, wash socks
• Learn to be gentle. Explain that this is not at all a shame to show affection and care for children, animal flowers
• We teach his son to pronounce emotions. The kid can cry with resentment, bite with anger. Explain to him that this is normal. Emotions dictate the body how to behave. Speak your emotions with your child. Thanks to your help with age, he will understand what embarrassment and resentment, anger and longing are. He will learn to adequately cope with his emotions and not be shy of manifestations of their
• Give him the opportunity to believe in something. Mom is not always there when your son will have to experience pain and fear, disappointment and resentment. Give him faith in the fact that he is not alone, even when you are not nearby
• Give your son the opportunity to help. Become this example for your son

Need:

• Tell stories, watch cartoons, films, where the heroes are gray and kind princes, rescuers of the intercessor
• Play with a variety of toys. Sometimes even with girls dolls, cook, seamstress. It is useful for the child to be versatile learning to take care of small and women
• To communicate with friends with the child. The child must learn to communicate men with an example
• Talking about their parents positively. Visit the boy more often with the boy
• To my mom to respond to dad only positively
• Emphasize male deeds without accenting on the weak

It is forbidden:

• Sleep a boy with a mother from an early age
• Impose your opinion
• Make only what you say
• Play with your favorite toys
• Ignore the ideas of the son
• Forbid playing with boys that you do not like
• Stand up for the child if someone has taken the toy from him. Report a bully and return the toy to your son
• Enter the conflict with peers to the side of the son, not allowing to figure it out yourself
• Constantly make condescension and intercede when the other parent makes a remark
• Do not call the boy with a diminutive affectionate words. Emphasize male virtues with the appeal: “Hero”, “Defender”, “Boy”, “Son”

Little boys are very tender and affectionate. They really need your love. Feel free to kiss the baby. From this he will not grow up. He will simply preserve this feeling of maternal love for life.

Video: How to raise boys correctly. Tips for psychologists

How to raise a boy without a father alone?

• You cannot lay the functions of the husband on the son. Relations are formed, which subsequently do not allow their son to live their life
• Mom should convey to the child that, having become adults, he needs to find his soul mate. Bring children. Raise their children and take care of your beloved
• Mom should remain a weak and defenseless woman for her son. And don't try to replace a man
• Let the child feel sorry for you
• If the father has left or is not alive, remember with the child only positive points
• If parents are divorced and dad has the opportunity to communicate with his son, do not prevent. The child should receive male energy
• Do not Sede and do not be through a strict chur
• Do not try to replace dad, be yourself
• Choose a role model, your dad, brother, coach. Let the baby take an example from a positive man
• Give your son to the section
• Read books, watch films about brave musketeers and rescuers
• Show positive examples of men on the street
• Do not shift your grievances to your husband, do not deprive the son of male education

How to educate a teenage boy?

• The transitional age of the boy is a difficult period for parents
• The boy can fall into a bad environment and commit many not faithful acts
• Psychologists advise to remember how it happened at this age, to understand what the boy feels on yourself

We go down to its level of understanding and proceed to the correct psychological impact:

• We become a friend of the son. A friend will always support and not condemn. We do not scold and do not punish if the smell of tobacco is smiled. Once, having scared you forever pushing your son away from yourself. We are talking to him about how the girls do not like it, that this is not fashionable now. How it harms health
• The teenager does not want to be at home. He's bored. He seeks to know the world. We find common topics. We are interested in what your son likes. We do not criticize his views. We share his interests
• It is important for the boy to feel any responsibility at this age we load him with executable male assignments. For example, we repair a computer with dad. This is interesting and will help dad presenting tools to get acquainted with new skills
• We trust the child if you are with him in the same topic, good parental impact will not remain without a trace
• We do not ask intimate questions if the teenager did not start a conversation on this subject. Inadvertently we leave an open article on this topic on the table. A teenager will imperceptibly study this topic
• In a family where there is no father. It is more difficult to educate a teenager. The boy does not have a model of male behavior. It is very dangerous. Negative examples of peers may take on the sample. The surrounding friends of the child should be controlled. Mom should interest the teenager with positive examples. So that he imitates Jackie Chan, for example, and not a bully from a neighboring court. The teenager will not change from one conversation, but perhaps he will think. Continue the conversations constantly
• We bring to the child the benefits of higher education. On the example of his idols, for example, Chester Bennington, who made a successful career and received a higher education. Speak in a free simple language
• We force the boy to play sports, provided that he choose the very type of the section. We show that we trust the child in choosing. The son will answer you with the same trust
• We correctly build our relationship with a teenager, several hours of silence, in order to express our discontent, will be enough

What is the difference between the upbringing of a girl from the upbringing of a boy?

The main difference in raising a boy and a girl is that the boy needs to trust, and the girl needs to take care of.

• For a son, too expressive care will look like distrust in his independence. Lack of faith in his ability to do something on his own
• If daughters provide freedom of action, it may seem to her that no one needs her, she is not loved
• Son to grow caring needs trust
• Daughters to trust someone need care

Several differences in the boy and girls:

• It is important for little Jeltmen that love for them manifests itself in the support of his independence. It must be motivated positively in relation to its activities and the results
• It is important for a little lady that they would love for what they are like they are. You need to understand their feelings and desires
• Boys need to admire the results achieved, for the work they did
• Babies need to admire themselves, not their actions
• The boy needs a goal and approval for success
• Little lady needs help and approval
• The boy is satisfied if someone needs his help. If he is not in demand, he can fall into despondency
• The baby to be a happy woman needs help and support. If you have to act without support, a girl, and in the future a woman will be unhappy. She will feel that no one needs
• The boy carries out when he feels trust and approval
• The girl, confident in herself and trusts loved ones when she feels care and attention to herself

Natasha: It turned out that she raised one son. When my son was born, I often went on business trips. She left her son with her parents. Worked as a geologist. I wanted to defend the dissertation. At the age of 14, his son fell into a bad company, problems began. She stopped business trips, took up education. But it was too late. I lost my son. He died in the next brawl. Now neither money nor a dissertation is needed. Need a son, but there is no son.

Andrew: I was brought up with my grandparents. Grew a fairly strong personality. Successful and happy. Two children. Beloved wife. I can say from my own experience, it doesn’t matter who educates. Important as.

Svetlana: When there is no father, it's not so scary. When there are such fathers who would not be better at all. This is already a problem. Where to get a positive example if the father is busy with the child in another family. I want to cry from resentment when I see how my son repeats my habits in everyday life.

When looking for the best ways to educate, we involuntarily become better. Raising children we are brought up ourselves.

Video: errors in raising children. Osipov.A.