The word cannot be children. Does the child need to say the word "impossible"?

In raising a child, prohibitions play a large role, but constant “cannot” can lead to a completely different result that will affect the whole future life.

Content

Education of a child is a long and complex process that begins from the moment the child realizes certain prohibitions and rules. But is it right to tell the child the word “impossible” all the time, should it be in the vocabulary of a young mother? As it turns out, this question is not so simple to answer this question, and numerous prohibitions can lead to unexpected consequences.

When do children have a taboo?

Until one year old, the child does not respond to prohibitions and even after a year can ignore a direct demand to stop the activity that is objectionable to his mother. Sometimes children react in a completely different way to prohibitions: with great zeal, they begin to be conceived or arrange a hysteria, the purpose of which is to defend their desire.

When does the child begin to respond correctly to the ban? Each child is individuality and the timing of the formation of such a neoplasm in the mind of the baby as the ban - everyone has their own. Children who rarely hear “cannot be” can begin to understand the ban much later than their peers.

Can you not say a child?

Obviously, a child who does not know prohibitions performs a lot of actions that can cause him direct harm. In modern apartments and houses, which represent an unknown and such tempting world for the child, in a huge number of danger sources are contained. These are sockets, corners, cutting and stitching objects, household chemicals and other objects in excess in the habitat of the child.

Therefore, it is not surprising that parents from a very young age, even when the child does not yet understand speech, introduce him to prohibitions. And since modern children are extremely active, there are many prohibitions, which negatively affects the psyche of a child surrounded by continuous taboos.

Why can't children say "not"?

A child to whom everyone is prohibited from childhood is growing with a sense of internal tightness, stiffness of internal potential and will be prone to dependence on someone else's opinion in the future. Prohibiting a lot of things to your baby, you develop complexes in it, limit its right to choose and narrow the horizons. Such a child over time will lose the desire to know the world, because at every step, opening up something new, he meets the ban.

In the future, improper upbringing of a child regarding the word “cannot” can affect the inanimate, self -doubt and conformity. The child will be afraid to express his opinion at school in any discussions, will be afraid to answer, because he will subconsciously feel the wrong way-from childhood he was accustomed that this is not possible, he and this did incorrectly.

Should the word “impossible” be in the vocabulary of parents?

Definitely the child should understand what is good, what is bad and know when he does wrong. Experts argue that when raising children and the formation of certain prohibitions, it is necessary to focus on age.

It turns out that in accordance with this theory, the child can remember and realize as much “impossible” as it has years. So, for a two-year-old baby, two main prohibitions should be distinguished and not imposed more, and children should not be prohibited at all-they are not yet able to perceive the meaning of a parental word.

Bedied prohibitions

Wise parents organize the space and leisure of their baby in such a way that the child simply could not do wrong. This will be provided if you:

create a comfortable and safe atmosphere by neutralizing all dangers
give your child the conditions for creativity in which any valuable things and clothes will not be spoiled
you will give the child the right example of manipulations with various items
clearly determine the prohibitions and will adhere to them clearly: it is unacceptable that one of the parents will allow what prohibits the other

Thanks to these simple rules, the child will receive some freedom, will develop harmoniously and versatilely, be interested in the world around him and try to know him. And the extra senseless prohibitions will not be able to harm a delicate children's psyche.

Parental tricks

The word “impossible” is categorical, but it will become more acceptable if you paint it in more delicate tones and try not only to express the ban, but to explain to the child: why not? How can this be dangerous? How to do well and right?

If you repeat the consequences of actions and explain to the child with a gentle, caring tone, then the ban will not cause negativity and hysteria, the child after some time will begin to understand and cease to perform an undesirable action.

An excellent solution when enthusiasm for a child, something forbidden would be to try to distract him. Various visual objects are suitable for very young children: “Look, dog!”, “Here the butterfly flies”, etc. For older children, they are suitable:

the nursery rhymes
counting
poems
finger games

It is important not to show negative emotions if the child does not behave the way you would like. Do not show anger, anger, do not resort to scream, even if the baby is very spoiled. The rule of caring parents is to always show tenderness and love in words and actions.

Words that cannot speak to children

Often parents say phrases that adversely affect the child. As a rule, such “pedagogical techniques” are rooted in the past - as our parents, grandmothers said, and their great -grandmothers said. And no one thinks about the essence of what was said and the influence on his child. What should not be told to the child so as not to harm him?

Never tell the child:

“If you don’t eat well, you won’t grow up” - such a phrase can form complexes in the child and even cause the problem of excess weight in the future
“Listen to your mother, otherwise a woman will take you” - you should not sow fear in the child’s soul, because he can develop in a serious phobia that your child will carry through his whole life (even among adults of reasonable people there are many those who are afraid of darkness and tremble from any rustle )

“How awkward are you”, “You do everything wrong”, “You have hands-tricks”-such words humiliate the dignity of the child, his self-esteem, self-confidence. The kid will consider himself unworthy of anything, inextricable, worse than others
“If you pick yourself in your nose, then you will break your finger”, “Do not grumble, otherwise you will remain like this” - so that the child does not do uncultured actions should explain the child’s true reason why they do not do this, and not invent fables. Show the correct example: if you want the child not to pick in the nose, then first of all do not pick up your nose yourself

“All children are ugly and bad, and you are the most beautiful and good” - you should not grow a narcissistic creature in the child, considering himself the center of the universe. Say which child is wonderful and beautiful, but do not denigrate others in the eyes of the child

The word "impossible" in raising a child

Communication with the child is an important component of interaction with him and the method of pedagogical influence. Therefore, you should be very careful about the said words, as well as the tone that they say. The word “cannot” must be present, because without prohibitions it is impossible to imagine a full -fledged process of education, but it should not be said for every reason without infringing on the child and not completely limiting it, but only as a restraining force.