Guest marriage: pros and cons, psychology, reviews. How much can a guest marriage last?

Guest marriage: pros and cons, psychology, reviews. How much can a guest marriage last?

What is a guest marriage? How do husband and wife live in a guest marriage and why do such relationships choose for themselves?

Salvation of the family or deviation from normal marital life, the choice of non -independent people running from problems? Guest marriage may be the only way to maintain relationships that are doomed in a traditional family, a “rescue circle” for love, drowning in a sea of \u200b\u200bhousehold problems.

What does guest marriage mean?

Guest (extraterritorial) marriage - Officially registered relations between a man and a woman, not implying cohabitation and housekeeping.

Spouses can, if desired and approval, spend their free time together, go on vacation. The birth and education of children in guest marriage is not uncommon. At the same time, young children usually live with their mother, the older ones - at will.

Ostat marriage retains the acuteness of feelings for a long time
ostat marriage retains the acuteness of feelings for a long time

Guest marriage: Psychology

Why do men and women loving each other refuse to live and choose for themselves a convenient, in their opinion, guest marriage?

Spouses come to separate residence, who:

  • cannot stand each other in everyday life, constantly quarrel because of the little things
  • they build a career in different cities or countries
  • have a negative experience in living together in the past and are afraid of repeating the situation in a new marriage
  • they want to extend romantic feelings and freshness of relations
  • they have no desire to adapt to another spouse, violating their own personal space
  • have creative professions (artists, artists, writers, directors)

The most famous guest marriage of creative people is the union of actress Helena Bonya Carter and director Tim Berton. Spouses have been living in neighboring houses for many years and are very pleased with their position.

Guest marriage: Psychology
Guest marriage: Psychology

Guest marriage without children: pros and cons of

It may seem that in most cases men choose guest marriage, because the advantages of such a free life are obvious to them. However, wives also often act as a guest marriage organization.

If there are no children in the family, the positive aspects of such relations for spouses are:

  • independence and freedom
  • lack of responsibilities in everyday life and quarrels on this basis
  • dating only at a convenient time for two spouses
  • only a pleasant pastime with its soulmate
  • the acuteness of feelings remains for a long time

Guest marriage also has serious disadvantages. It:

  • the occurrence of difficulties in cases where one of the spouses needs material support, is sick or does not have favorable social conditions
  • relations built on romantic experiences and sexual satisfaction quickly spoil if feelings are "burned out"
  • the distance will win sooner or later, the feelings of the spouses will cool down, because Skype and phone calls cannot replace the joy of personal meetings and the comfort of the family hearth
  • in relations, there is often jealousy
  • if the spouses are comfortable to live in a guest marriage, perhaps they are not at all ready for serious relationships
  • in guest marriage there is no emotional affection between spouses
Guest marriage without children: pros and cons of
Guest marriage without children: pros and cons of

Guest marriage with a child: pros and cons of

The main disadvantages of guest marriage with a child can be called:

  • the content and upbringing of children falls on the shoulders of one of the parents (usually mom)
  • lack of communication between children with an absent parent
  • the coming parent is not perceived by children as a full -fledged member of the family
  • children do not feel that they live in a full family
  • children have a wrong idea of \u200b\u200bthe family, relationships between a man and a woman in marriage

Advantages of guest marriage with a child:

  • the raising parent has more free time that can be given to the child
  • the coming parent will be happy to spend time with the child, drive for walks, in sections, mugs, entertainment centers
  • the child will grow up in a calm family where mutual understanding and love reign
  • the child will not see the dissatisfaction of parents to each other, household disputes and fatigue
Guest marriage with a child: pros and cons of
Guest marriage with a child: pros and cons of

How much can a guest marriage last?

Guest marriage, just like ordinary, can not last long, or can connect two loving people forever. The duration of guest marriage depends on many factors, the main of which are the feelings of spouses to each other. If feelings have cooled, but life never tied, marriage will break up.

How much can a guest marriage last?
How much can a guest marriage last?

How to transfer guest marriage into traditional?

The transition of guest marriage to traditional may be a difficult task. It would seem that the relationship is registered, the feelings between the spouses are only growing stronger over time, but at the same time the desire to live together in one of them does not appear.

The transfer of guest relations to a new level is possible only if both strive for joint residence and maintenance of farms. When the spouses understand that they want to establish a common life together, to educate children and equally share all the joys and hardships of family life, they will begin to live together.

If the transfer of guest marriage into traditional is the idea of \u200b\u200bone spouse and at the same time the “terrible dream” of the second, nothing good will come of such a venture. It is impossible to force an adult to fully participate in the life of his spouse.

The only thing that can be done to attempt to create a traditional marriage is to talk with the spouse, clearly outlining your desires and hopes. But do not “put pressure” on a partner if he has completely different plans.

How to transfer guest marriage into traditional?
How to transfer guest marriage into traditional?

Will a guest marriage have a traditional family?

Guest marriage is gradually becoming the norm. Forced to look for a part -time job far from their hometown, husbands and wives leave at home, leave for a while. And so, when the loans are repaid, the children are learned and the housing is purchased, the couple begins again with a life together. However, by this time, husband and wife are already so accustomed to independence and independence that joint accommodation is turning for them into a real test.

Another model of modern guest marriage looks like this: he is a middle -aged man whose shoulders already have an unsuccessful experience of family life; She is a successful, secured, self -sufficient woman who is used to doing without outside help, to solve problems on her own. The joint life of such a couple may be problematic, but a guest marriage will give spouses everything they need.

In Europe, guest marriage is very popular. More than 40% of European married couples have chosen such a relationship for themselves.

Of course, a guest marriage will not be able to completely supplant traditional relations, but the fact that the number of guest couples is increasing annually is an undeniable fact.

Will a guest marriage have a traditional family?
Will a guest marriage have a traditional family?

Guest marriage Orthodoxy

Orthodoxy does not encourage guest marriages. Church ministers, parting family life, resemble words from the Bible: "" And the husband will stick to his wife, and there will be two in the flesh of one».

Even Eve sinned when her husband left her alone for a while. What can we say about modern men and women who are in wait for the temptations from the evil one at every step?

I want a guest marriage: where to meet?

To anyone who is sure that a traditional marriage is not a place in his life, to find the second half is not as difficult as it may seem right away. All methods of acquaintance are standard, starting from an accidental meeting on the street to choosing a contender on a dating site.

Most importantly, even at the beginning of the acquaintance, indicate your position, find out how the chosen one relates to a guest marriage.

Whether a guest marriage will be happy, it is impossible to predict. If a man and a woman love and respect each other, in any case they will be able to adequately overcome life difficulties even in ordinary traditional marriage. At the same time, partners who are not ready for serious relations will not even save the “lightweight” guest model of marriage.

Video: Pros and cons and cons of guest marriage. Is it difficult to maintain relations if the spouses live in two countries?



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Comments K. article

  1. I have a guest marriage. I am 44, my husband 51. Already 6 years old. Everything suits me. I see my husband exactly as much as I want. We live in neighboring houses, my husband is a massage therapist, works in his apartment, often sleeps there. Sometimes we spend the night with him, sometimes with me. We are together, we go shopping, go to the country. I have a daughter from 1 marriage, lives separately. “How we live so” no one understands. But many are jealous.)) I think such a marriage is mostly suitable for adults, if there are children, it is better to live together. In this article I do not agree that there is no emotional connection between spouses in a guest marriage. It is not true. My husband and I have a very warm relationship. And we are support and support for each other, as in any normal family.

  2. For 3 years now I have been in a “guest marriage” so to speak. Now they submitted an application to the registry office. To be honest, I don’t really want this - my life is absolutely not to change. We live in different towns an hour riding from each other. The husband has two children from his first marriage, the eldest daughter lives with him, the youngest son often happens to him. Children are used to living in their own way, and I have a different understanding of cleanliness and order in the apartment, relationships with loved ones. In part, in order not to strain each other in this regard, partly on the “dependence” on comfort, I do not want to move to my husband - let everything remain as it is. Yes, I miss, yes, I have little to spend 2 days a week with him, but I have it as it is.

  3. Two days ago, I broke such a relationship. This is an unconditionally beautiful episode in my life, but I hoped that he would develop into constant serious relationships. When I realized that a man did not see me as a companion of life, she stopped everything ... We met in the Crimea, in the sanatorium. It was a typical resort novel. I am a widow, he is divorced, many points indicated that the meeting was fateful, we both paid attention to this. Then the period of communication began on the phone (we are of different cities), recognition of love, long -awaited meetings twice a month, sometimes more often, then with me. I stopped all this myself, three months after meeting, wrote to him that I did not see the point in guest relationships and doubt his feelings. He did not get in touch anymore ... Rhus every day, but I think that she did the right thing ... On the other hand, doubts torment, or maybe the time has not come to go to other relationships? I hurried? and destroyed everything ...

  4. Guest marriage is not a new phenomenon. It has existed since ancient times among many peoples of Asia and Africa. However, not only with them. Far swimming sailors, astronauts, truckers, professional athletes, musicians - they actually live in guest marriages, as they rarely see their wives and children.

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