Not every woman wants to give birth to children and some believe that the maternal instinct is completely absent. But is it? Why doesn't the wife want to give birth to a child? You will learn about this in our article.
Content
- Why women refuse to give birth to children: reasons
- What if the wife does not want children?
- Is it worth it to get divorced if the wife does not want a child?
- What to do if the wife does not want to give birth to a second child?
- What to do - the wife does not want to have children: psychologists' advice
- Video: Wife doesn't want children
It often happens that men do not want to have children, but women are also found. If the first to understand is easy, then the second situation is somewhat more complicated. After all, women give birth to children, not men. And the male task is different. And this is not to challenge.
And it so happened that since nature gave women the function of the birth of children, then they should want it. After all, why then a person is generally such a function if he does not need it. Of course, there is no need. Accordingly, nature endowed women with the opportunity to give birth to children by chance.
Accordingly, it is laid in every woman, but for some reason sometimes falls asleep. It is believed that about 6% of women do not have maternal instinct. Someone will say that this is quite a bit, but this is not so. But still, why can a woman abandon the birth of a child and what to do about it? Let's find out.
Why women refuse to give birth to children: reasons
As a rule, women refuse to give birth to children not for natural reasons. And everything affects it so much that the maternal instinct will even drown out. It often seems that a woman does not like children at all. There are several reasons that force women to refuse the birth of the baby.
- The wife does not want children - she grew up in a large family
When a woman grows in a large family, she does not receive enough attention. For the most part, she is left to herself and she lacks communication. If she was the youngest, then she often does not have personal things, because she gets everything from the elders. Of course, this leaves its mark and, becoming an adult, a cold attitude becomes towards children. And the point is not even the absence of maternal instinct. He simply hid in the depths of the subconscious.
Usually in such cases, women do not want to give birth if the family was problematic. In other words, it is hidden in education and comes from childhood. It is indisputable when the family is large, it is not bad, but we must never forget about children to educate them. As a rule, if there are no problems with this, then the girl always grows up loving kids, and not vice versa.
- Wife does not want children - she does not know how to love
There is a reverse situation when the girl grew alone and all her whims were fulfilled. She received as much love as it could be divided into several children. Usually such girls become very spoiled and capricious ladies. Of course, such a girl does not know how to love, because she is used to that only love is given to her. And she does not want her children, because they will have to give love and affection. Again, excessive parental affection, tenderness and custody were too much suppressed the maternal instinct in it.
- The wife does not want children - there is not enough money to live
Often, such a reason becomes a reason for refusing the birth of children. Undoubtedly, how can you keep a child if you have a very small salary and you live in rental housing? But does the woman really do not want children, that's why the occasion? Of course not. After all, the situation can always be corrected, and if a person does not strive for this, then for a reason. There are such families when wealth is higher than average, and the woman still does not want children.
People are such creatures that they are always not enough money, even if there are a lot of it. So the reasons for the lack of funds for maintaining a child are usually far -fetched. But ordinary laziness is hiding behind them, unwillingness to take responsibility for a little man, as well as banal greed.
- The wife does not want children - she wants to build a career
According to female emancipation, a man and a woman should be in all equal. Accordingly, first some want to build a good career and only then think about the birth of children.
But think when it comes? A career can be built all your life, and by the age of 50 you can’t give birth to exactly, because time has been lost, and I want to live for myself. Often women do not understand that in fact, children do not at all interfere with their career. After all, how many successful women who are mothers can prove it to you. Surely, among your friends there is someone who knows such.
In addition, why chase the equality with men? To surpass them or prove something? But this is possible in ordinary life. To do this, you need to do what no man can do - to give birth to a baby.
- The wife does not want children - fear to grow up and become ugly
By the way, it happens that the men themselves are afraid of this. In general, this reason is unlikely to be justified, because it is based on the same egoism, laziness and so on. Even if a woman gains several kilograms, she can still remain attractive if she makes some efforts.
Completeness is generally suitable for some women, and they become even more attractive. Men definitely do not leave such women. And if this happens, then the man simply uses it as a reason, he would have left without it. In addition, in most cases, women return back to their forms after childbirth.
In other words, there is no need to be afraid to gain weight. There is nothing wrong with that. You can always bring yourself to the desired shape or make the fullness will become a dignity.
- Wife does not want children - uncertainty in a man
When a woman does not know if she can fully rely on her man, she should figure out why she adheres to this. If a man takes care of his beloved, helps in everything and supports, then after the appearance of the child nothing will change. He will be the same husband, and also a caring father.
If the situation is reverse and the woman is left to herself, then the situation is deplorable. Even after the birth of the baby, she will not wait for any help. He will not help, because he did not seek this before. You can say that your man is an exception, but hardly. You clearly incorrectly evaluate the situation.
What to do in this case? There are several options:
- To agree with her husband and give a damn about his nature. There will be no children in marriage, although someday a woman will definitely get tired
- A man will change his attitude and still will behave appropriately
- Find another man and make children with him
It is precisely to do, you need to solve it yourself.
- Wife does not want children - fear of pregnancy and childbirth
This happens too. After all, we are afraid to go to the dentists, although there is nothing so terrible and there is no, but pregnancy is already much more serious.
Usually the girl begins to be very afraid when her girlfriends intimidated her and all unanimously talk about how painful it is. Undoubtedly, everyone tries to cope with such fear and still give birth, but some begin to experience such a strong fear that they have to overcome him with a psychologist.
- Wife does not want children - medical contraindications
Often girls are afraid that genetic diseases will be transmitted to the baby, they themselves have poor health, or there are some problems that may become an obstacle to bearing the baby. Despite everything, it is necessary to discuss this together and decide what to do. Perhaps not everything is so bad and there are chances of success.
As you know, an instinct for a woman cannot be absent at all. After all, this is instinct. But today's life is such that women often are actively influenced by third -party factors that do not always manage to resist.
What if the wife does not want children?
When the spouses look at one problem from different angles, it is worth trying to look for a compromise that will definitely suit both. What to do to her husband if the wife stubbornly refuses to give birth to a baby?
First of all, you need to find out the reasons for this behavior. Perhaps they are not so serious. First you have to look in yourself. Please note whether you earn enough? Maybe you have too low income, and your spouse is afraid to hint at it, and the appearance of the child will clearly put you in a deep hole. It is also important to decide on the issue of trust. If it is not, then it is clear why the wife does not want to have children. But if everything is in order on both points, then it is worth talking to his wife and asking directly why she does not want to continue her family.
Is it worth it to get divorced if the wife does not want a child?
In this case, divorce is not a solution to the problem. A man in such a situation does not just want a child. He should be from his beloved woman. They just want children in rare cases. Undoubtedly, you can always divorce and find the woman who will love children. But it will be a selfish act.
You must understand that children are always happy when their mom and dad love each other. And when parents simply love children, but not each other, such relationships will definitely not be an example to follow. So it is worth breaking up only in the most extreme case. It is better to try to persuade her husband, solve problems with her, arouse her maternal instinct.
What to do if the wife does not want to give birth to a second child?
If you already have one baby, but your wife does not want to agree on the second, then you should behave as a competent psychologist. First of all, you should decide on the reasons why the wife does not want to be a mother for the second time. Most likely, she had problems in her first birth, the baby has developmental deviations or she is simply afraid to give birth. Some are afraid for the figure, because in the first birth it was hard to restore, and after the latter it will remain.
When the reasons are clear to you, it will be easier to start action and try to carefully change the opinion of the spouse. The pressure and declination in its direction does not work here. After all, a woman, as a mother, should love the child, and if he is unwanted, then she will be very easy to do.
What to do - the wife does not want to have children: psychologists' advice
Psychologists also have an opinion that her husband should definitely find out the reason and try to fix it. For example, if the wife is afraid to be a bad mother, then it is necessary to ensure that she changes her opinion.
If the first birth was very difficult or the child died in their process, or maybe there was a miscarriage in the late stages, then only a psychologist can help the problem. He will help the woman get out of depression and believe in her strength again.
If a woman has not yet walled up and is not ready for the birth of children, then do not rush with them. The moment when she decides will definitely come.
1) In people, unlike animals, there are no instincts - they prevented them from quickly adapting to a changing environment and eventually completely disappeared.
2) animals, in which some instincts are really present, easily kill other people's cubs, even their own. And eat. In insects in which instincts replace the missing mind, everything is funnier - for example, lay eggs in an instinctively dug mink, even if they stole the foods instinctively trapped there, and the wasp sees it.
Instincts are stupid and meaningless. It is very good that people do not have them and we can decide for ourselves, get children or live only for our beloved.