How to save a family on the verge of a divorce: stages that need to go through to save the family

It is very easy to destroy, but let's try to build a destroyed relationship and prevent the family from getting to a divorce.

In a certain period of their relations, each married couple faces difficulties. The difficulties in communication and understanding are brewing, as a result of which partners often make a hasty decision - to disperse.

Sometimes this comes from a lack of life experience, but it happens that the spouses simply did not learn to fight for family relations. In any case, the tips of the psychologist will not be superfluous, which will help to understand the problem and build their individual system to preserve romance and harmony in the family.

How to save a family on the verge of a divorce: stages that will help maintain relationships

The connection between a man and a woman is built on the passage of seven stages of development of relationships. Each stage has its own characteristics, without which the further formation of a family union is impossible.

In order to find harmonious relationships and prevent discord in the family, it is necessary to decide in which phase of development is the partner union and follow certain advice.

Stage of partners' love - has a characteristic of natural selection. Science proven that the choice of life satellite in the initial stage of relations is often due to hormonal and chemical processes in the body, and has little in common with common sense. In this state, a person is inclined to idealize the object of admiration, discarding inconsistencies and consequences into the background. The phase of the illusory eclipse of the psyche can stretch for up to two years. During this period, a person is capable of the accomplishment of the most rash actions, which, as it seems to him, are the highest manifestation of love towards the partner. The disadvantage of such relationships is hasty marriages under the influence of emotions. To prevent disappointment in the future from such a union, it is necessary to avoid making important decisions in a short time. It is recommended not to succumb to euphoria, take a pause for thinking - time will help put thoughts in order and make a balanced decision.
Love
The stage of addiction - It arises in the process of emotional reassurance between lovers. Gradually, the moments of fluctuations and euphoria are transmitted to the degree of equilibrium. There is a loss of sharpness of feelings, and people begin to more realistic to evaluate the prospect of their relationship. In this phase, their joint life can proceed calmly, without any special changes: lovers learn more about each other-rub their characters, learn to find compromises in household disagreements, study habits and try to combine the former lifestyle with the current situation. Due to the fact that household contact allows you to identify both advantages and disadvantages - the depreciation of the partner is performed in some way. Everyday life relieves charm with romanticism - relations acquire a typical form. To save the family, you need to try and continue to see your partner from the best side.
Lice and addiction
Stage of cooling - It begins after a sober revaluation of relations, as a result of which disappointment often occurs. This is especially true for the couples in which the marriage was a hastily made decision. Those qualities of the character of the partner that were justified at the initial stage of relations during the period of falling in love are now unbearable. Each of the spouses considers it to be due to justify only his actions. Sometimes a man and a woman become, maximally picky and unyielding - thereby bringing absolutely petty reasons to the point of absurdity. The result of such behavior can be a divorce. In this case, it is important to understand that the rupture of marriage bonds is not a denouement of problems with the opposite sex. New relationships do not guarantee a successful marriage. The couple must learn to respect someone else's opinion and listen to the wishes of the spouse or spouse, learn to communicate and accept character characteristics.
They become picky
Stage of tolerance - occurs as a result of manifestation of judgment and growing up in the relationship of the couple. Spouses understand that each of them is an integral person who has the right to his inner world, a special opinion. A reasonable solution will not affect the self -expression of a partner with aggressive methods. This will allow both spouses to feel comfortable and confident in marriage. In such a couple, conflict situations are solved quickly - partners try not to delay long -term grievances, they can agree. There is also no desire for idealization: there is a belief - everyone has the right to error and at difficult times it is important to obtain support from a loved one, and not condemnation. There is a desire to know the secrets of improving the marriage. This leads a couple to a meaningful joint desire to work on themselves: to study all kinds of practices in this direction, to visit psychological consultations, to be interested in relevant literature. better To save the family, you must try to understand the partner in any situation, see the strengths and weaknesses of this marriage, work out the missing needs and strengthen the union.
Study to strengthen the union
Stage of good deed - It is based on self -sacrifice for the sake of a loved one. Personal interests no longer occupy a paramount position, giving way to the desire to do something for a partner. At this stage, both spouses prefer to invest more in relationships than to exhaust from there. There is a concern and inclinations of true love - implying selfless feelings that are not endowed with selfishness. Trust relationships reach the peak - both spouses are confident in the firmness of their union and cease to exert control and pressure on each other. Instead, the need to patronize the second half is formed, motivation serves - the need to show love, delight, be a right person. This brings a special degree of demand and satisfaction of the couple. To save the family, in the case of a disagreement at this stage, a mental conversation with a loved one will help.
Care manifests itself
Friendly stage - mutual experience, solving many everyday problems, common traditions and interests, including joint acquired achievements. This allows you to predict each other's reaction in life situations. Between the spouses, mutual understanding reigns - based on experience, the desires of the partner are easily guessed. The husband and wife have sufficiently studied and accepted the character, tastes, manner of behavior, fears and experiences of both - which originated in their union friendly relations. Thanks to this feeling - marriage has acquired a more integral coloring. In the case of a disagreement at this stage, it is enough to take a pause and shut up. Having calmed down, you will understand how a loved one is dear to you.
Stage of love - characterized by the highest degree of unity between spouses. In this case, the couple’s relations are devoid of selfishness and consumer intentions. To both spouses gives more pleasure - to live for the benefit of a partner. In addition to the manifestation of tenderness and care - the spouses gain a sense of confidence, reliability and peacefulness in marriage. True love is achieved over time - the spouses must pass the aforementioned phases of development before achieving awareness and harmony. Partners overcome any fateful obstacles together, put up with character imperfections, focus on the merits and value communication. Romance goes to a new level - instead of frivolous passion, there is a need to be together, serene delight and contentment with life. To achieve the level of mutual understanding in marriage - it is necessary to work on relations from their very beginning. It is meaningful to try to resolve conflict situations and take responsibility for their decision. Do not shift the difficulties to the partner’s shoulders.

It is important to understand that a successful marriage is mutual work on mistakes, generosity in your intentions, the ability to be condescending and a desire to maintain a relationship. Spouses must defend their happiness in the everyday struggle with trials. Only thanks to experience and acquired knowledge - can you build harmonious and long relationships, as well as to maintain a marriage in the divorce.