Relations at a distance are a very difficult type of relationship, but we will tell you how to keep love.
Opinions regarding relations at a distance diverge. Some believe that this is impossible, others - by all means are trying to preserve love.
Relations at a distance: how to keep love - psychologist's advice
Relations at a distance are considered very difficult for both partners. What is the difficulty? It doesn’t matter whether you are waiting for or are waiting for you, you need to overcome longing, keep loyalty, and tolerate unbearable pain of separation from your beloved. Such love is very exhausting a person. I want support, hugs, warm words, but dear. It is believed that this is one of the most difficult tests.
Disagreements in such relationships are difficult to transfer, resentment is added to all this for the fact that the right person cannot be near at this moment. And instead of the usual proximity, you get only calls and brief messages. According to statistics, such separation does not last more than 2-3 years, and then feelings begin to go out, and 95% of the couples diverge. If the relationship lasts more than 3-4 years, then you need to be careful because they can break up at any time.
To make separation from your beloved not so painful, follow the advice of psychologists, how to keep love and relationship at a distance, described below:
- Communication.The most important thing for maintaining love at a distance is still communication. Write as often as possible using e -mail, instant messengers, talk on the phone, Skype. After all, it is of great importance to constantly keep the connection so that the second half is not deprived of attention and feels that it occupies an important place in your life. Of course, it is better to talk with your beloved on the phone, because the messages do not transmit the intonations of the human voice and everything written can be interpreted incorrectly. And, as a result, quarrels arise.
Council of a psychologist.Do not expect a reason to call or write first. Send the first to a short SMS about your feelings, ask how to do. This insignificant gesture will bring a lot of benefits. Talk about trifles, household chores, insignificant situations that happened, as if you are at an extended arm. It is not necessary to plan or think how everything will be when you reunite, it can, on the contrary, cause even greater longing for touch and regret that the partner is not nearby. Such conversations contribute to strengthening the connection of two loving hearts, maintaining relationships at a distance.
- Joint affairs.People who live together constantly do certain things together. An example can be to view the same film or program, read the same book. Talking on Skype or phone, prepare a dinner together. The creation of a daily plan on the Internet can be unusual and each of the partners can trace what the beloved will do all day.
- Do not deceive each otherto save love and relationships at a distance. Lies in a relationship do not lead to anything. Upon learning that you are being deceived, parting will be inevitable. The partner begins to lie, because he thinks that all the same, the truth will not be revealed and no one can check it. However, as soon as the couple meets, it is no longer possible to stop the lies and everything gets confused in a very tight ball, which can be unraveled. Before you lie, think, or you need it and whether it is worth continuing to continue in such a situation.
- The advantage of separation.Think about the advantages of relations at a distance. You do not break into your beloved because of household trifles, you can spend more time with family and friends, do not “ignite” because of the rudeness that you showed in the message. Each meeting is desirable, full of emotions. You can maintain your individuality, being far away from each other, which the couples do not have together every day.
- With understanding, treat misunderstandings.In a fit of anger, you can accidentally rude to a partner. Maybe due to problems at work, it is worried about some kind of unfinished business, etc. As they say, fall under a hot hand. Do not take everything seriously. Think and understand that this did not happen on purpose. You need to accept and support your favorite in difficult situations.
- Surprise and give gifts,to Save love and relationships at a distance.Make unexpected gifts to each other. Make yourself a photo album with your joint photos, and crossed by mail. Write a letter on paper. Order her favorite flowers with home delivery. Do the most unexpected and pleasant things, then the waiting time will pass faster and imperceptibly. Give your own thing for memory as a talisman. Every time you love him to see him, he will think about you.
- Jealousy and distrustthey will not allow keep relationships at a distance.It is very difficult to fight with jealousy, and at a distance it is impossible. Therefore, do not even think to start. Complete confidence in the partner and no questioning: where was, why he lingered, did not call, etc. If at least one of the couple is not ready to do this, it is better to leave. If this is not done right away, then you will still be separated, but before he flinges your nerves from eternal excuses and excuses, or a gap option because of another person. Another moment will be viewing social networks. Never do this, it will cause a storm of negative emotions. Just trust your loved one, there is no other way out. Remember that life does not stop, continue to develop and do everything as usual.
- Use any opportunity to see you.Relations cannot develop without meetings. Use different ways to meet, even if it is only a few hours. Make a trip schedule and adhere to it. Late your plans carefully, and then you will have more time to stay together. No need to collect large suitcases, prepare for a long time, just leave a few necessary things in your second half. If for some reason you cannot see often, then you need to take it a rule, see “no less than ... any specific period, optimal for you.” Psychologists advise choosing a neutral meeting place. This is due to the fact that someone alone will suffer and wait for him or she will come. And so a comfortable situation for both sides is created. Even if the meeting turns out in a couple of months, you must plan a specific date, and not say what can happen then.
- Take care of yourself. One of the options to be distracted during a relationship at a distance is to look at yourself. Take the figure in order, change the image, buy new things and embody all your dreams regarding the appearance.
Council of a psychologist. Devote time to campaigns in salons and sports centers. Start running in the morning. Get a little puppy that will accompany you on walks. Learn to find positive moments in life in this situation.
Parting will not last eternity. You will pleasantly surprise your lover when returning: your figure, self -confidence, can be culinary abilities and even new talents. All this will only strengthen your love and make a joint life bright and not the same.
- Outline things.Make yourself a list of necessary cases during the expectation that you must fulfill before the second half arrival. Find yourself a new hobby, a source of inspiration, develop your skills, learn to draw and write a picture. So you will spend this time with benefit.
Do I need to maintain a relationship at a distance?The answer is unequivocal when young people have long been married. A long business trip should only strengthen their relationship.
But, if you recently started dating, and someone has to leave, then you need to ask yourself a couple of questions. “Are you ready to invest to maintain relationships?”, “Being without your beloved for a long time?”, “Are you sure that you want to live with this person all your life?” The purpose of such questions is to give you understand or you need all this, to make your choice consciously.
Good relationships are not only feelings, but also long and hard work. And both, both a man and a woman, should work on her. Every day, partners are obliged to invest something in their relationship. No wonder the family is associated with the construction of the house. As it develops on a brick, and relations are being built. That is why, psychologists say that the connection of people who underwent a test of long separation will withstand any obstacles, and they will be happy together all their lives.