How to part with a man finally: with a married, lover, beloved, loving man - a psychologist

How to part with a man finally: with a married, lover, beloved, loving man - a psychologist

If you want to break the relationship completely, but you have certain difficulties in understanding the situation with a partner, we advise you to use the information below.

Most of all questions to psychologists, of course, women ask how to find and keep love. And, accordingly, most articles and video training on the network on this topic. But in fact, parting with a man is also a burning topic as, unfortunately, it happens that you realize that there can be no further development of relations or you no longer want them.

Of course, in such cases, I want the parting to be maximally painless. Today we have collected for you the advice of experienced psychologists about when to think about parting, when and what to say and what to do.

If your partner is married: how to part with a man?

Today, there is no one to surprise anyone with relations with a married partner. Often for women and girls who have been alone for a long time, such relationships seem to be the highest happiness. Fire passion, gifts, flowers and care can first turn your head, but over time comes the realization that more serious relationships and family hearth is unlikely to wait.

And if the family and children are in your life plans, then it is better for you to look for another candidate since for married men you are most often a holiday and a rest from gray everyday life. Of course, the outcome of such relationships can be different, but if your hints of marriage come across a blank wall, gather and find the strength to go further.

Married rarely leave the family
Married rarely leave the family
  • First you need to understand that relations with a married man (even with great love) can only afford those girls who do not plan to have a family and generally build a serious relationship. As well as those who are not embarrassed by the fact that the weekend, most likely, will spend alone, and walking in daylight in the city, too, will most likely fail.
  • That is, you should not initially count on healthy romantic relationships with cinema trips, walks with joint friends and the like.

IMPORTANT: Statistics say that less than five percent of men with a family, theoretically, are ready to leave everything for a new relationship and even less actually decide on this. And half of those who decided to divorce men later return to their former wives.

  • While you are met with a married man in your relationship, he finds a kind of confirmation of his own irresistibility, importance and male power. You are trying in every possible way to maintain the atmosphere of the holiday for him, and be perfect for him.
  • But as soon as you become his wife, the feeling of the holiday will leave and he will have to face your other side - you will not always burn out of passion in anticipation of his arrival, and you will also have to take on not always pleasant household duties.
  • I must say that men are very rational and very reverently related to the established order of life. And if you turn into a wife from a gentle and sweet Guria sooner or later, then what's the point of turning his life upside down, so that it is therefore drowning in a new routine?

Even if a married man experiences sincere feelings for you - behind your threshold he deceives his relatives, and he has to live in lies. In addition, you yourself become an accomplice of lies. Do you really want such a fate for yourself and your beloved?

From a married man you will hear a lot of lies
From a married man you will hear a lot of lies
  • Deceiving his wife, he deceives you, giving ghostly hopes for the family. He gives the time that he steals from his children and his wife as a handout. As a result, you will also be deceived, because he is not going to throw a family. Do you need this or maybe to part with a man finally?
  • Even if your beloved tells you that he is not sleeping with his wife, the probability that after love pleasures he goes to bed with his wife is more than high. Many men are simply excited only by the idea that two women want him.

Any male representative, creating a home and arranging it, is invested in it both morally and financially. And if moral costs during the division of property, of course, are not taken into account, then the possibility of a section of everything that was with difficulty and love was bought to create comfort in the house can lead anyone horrified. In this case, men prefer not to change anything.

How to finally part with a married man if you still decided to do so?

Tactics

Many psychologists advise moving away from a man gradually so that the separation process is not too painful. To begin with, come to terms with the idea that he can never create a family with you, since he already has a family that he will not leave for you. Your time is the biggest value and you should not spend it on pipe dreams, it is better to direct all your efforts to find someone who will love and protect only you.

To begin with, start small - many prepositions to cancel the meetings, do not show the initiative yourself and call less often. In addition, try to communicate more with friends - a trip to the cinema, bar or cafe, a trip with a girlfriend or mother to rest, do everything to have fun and not think about the man you part with.

Talk

All that you tell a man during the last conversation is better to carefully think over in advance. Very calmly and as tactfully as possible explain that you really want your family or just healthy normal relations with the perspective, and therefore do not see the meaning in further meetings.

Parting with a married one
Parting with a married one

Do not hold such a conversation at home. It is better to choose a place for him where there are a lot of people - this is how you can avoid the manifestation of anger or other undesirable emotions from the partner, and it will be easier for you.

What to do after the final parting with a married man?

Do not focus on the idea that with the end of the relationship, life is also over. Better think about what you take place in the time that are freed after parting-find a new hobby, go in for sports or go to dancing, equip your life better-there is no limit to perfection and you finally have time for this.

  • Do not be left alone-go to parties, presentations and master classes. Surround yourself with interesting people.
  • Avoid meetings with the former. Do not visit the places where he may seem with his family or friends, do not walk along the street where he works or lives. A fleeting gaze can disassemble the soul, and your determination will fade away.
  • If your ex does not want to part and try to continue the relationship - again explain to him for what reasons you are not interested in.
  • If a man frankly haunts you, you can threaten that you will tell you about your wife. Most likely, he will let you go.

Do not regret anything and give him a chance to return to you, just promising to change anything.

If you want to finally break off relations with your lover: what to do?

Sometimes it happens that married women have sexual partners on the side. Of course, I want to take a break from everyday life and bring into my life some vivid emotions and moments, which, alas, should not expect from her husband-family life, children and general household issues often destroy all romance.

Not to say that love goes out, it simply does not have enough time and effort. At such moments, men appear who, for some moment, seem more attractive to us than husbands, and we succumb to weakness.

Whether a woman acts as a seducer or is the victim of the temptation herself - relations on the side, all the lies and discomfort associated with them become part of our reality. For some time we are good and the intrigue gives a feeling of fullness of life, but it quickly passes and such relationships become a burden.

Parting with a lover
Parting with a lover

To final parting with a man It passed without reproaches, threats and loud quarrels use the advice of specialists in the field of psychology, which we will talk about below:

  • The strategy for termination of relations in this case should be developed, taking into account both your determination to break off the relationship and the desire of the partner. First of all, it is worth considering his character, psychotype and temperament - this will help choose the right actions and not break firewood.
  • Psychologists recommend a certain behavior model to part with partners of various psychotypes.
  • If next to you - choleric - Try so that he himself wants to break the relationship. These people are very impulsive and do not tolerate failures. In general, it is believed that you should not even start a connection with such people so as not to reproach yourself for the rest of your life for this.
  • To act on melancholic And the parting went as it should - gradually prepare him for him. Tell me how you are tormented by a conscience for a lie to your husband and children, about how you are attached to them.
  • Sanguine The easiest way to explain the need to break off relations. This can be done simply by talking honestly during a pleasant joint dinner. If you just tell him that you are tired of deception and want a calm life with your family - he will understand you.
  • Phlegmaticians - These are people with whom you can part easily and at ease. If you have no desire to explain anything, go “in English”. Phlegmatic will not look for you, demanding an explanation and create problem situations. Most likely, he will accept everything for granted and will live on.
Find out the type
Find out the type

If you are still attached to someone who is your lover, try to save your feelings. Below are general recommendations and principles that can be used, which finally break off relations with a man:

  • Break the relationship beautifully. Talk to your partner. Say that, analyzing your relationship, you have made a decision for yourself that close and home hearth are more important for you. Gratitude is the best strategy. Express gratitude for the good moments between you. Speak confidently - let him not think that you are playing with him. If he is an intelligent person, then he will understand and let you go.
  • Firm decision. After an important conversation, do not look for meetings, do not answer calls or emails. Do not torment yourself with thoughts about him and do not visit the places and the company where it happens. You should also remove him from friends on social networks - do not go to his page and monitor his life.
Solve firmly
Solve firmly
  • Separate gradually.If you still experience any feelings for your partner and are not able to immediately break the relationship-just set yourself a goal, and go to it gradually. Reduce the number of dates and their duration, replace them with something else-a hobby, friends, your family in the end and a lot more awaits you!
  • Look for his flaws.Even when we are well treated to a person, which we begin to notice help to cool feelings. Pay attention even to the smallest details - what you do not like in clothes, a mess in his apartment, gifts that he gives or not, a groomed appearance. All that you can find is thanks to this it will be easier for you to break the ties with him.
  • Replace relationships with a man with something useful for you.After farewell, devote more time to your loved ones, get ready on an unexpected journey. You can also do your job, a new hobby - do everything to be distracted from oppressive thoughts and not step on the same rake again.

If the lover does not want to part: what to do to part completely?

The decision to break off the connection can greatly affect the pride and behavior of your admirer. He can become furious, arrange tantrums and do many unpredictable acts in order to avenge you or make it hurt. Therefore, if you know that your partner does not intend to part - use the female cunning and wisdom, let him want to part. And our tips will help you with this.

  • Let him speak out.During the parting, try not to insult his moral or physical qualities. Even if he provoke you, try to listen to everything that he says, even the most unpleasant words with dignity. Do not get to the response of insults. Let him speak out and the last word will remain with him. So he will feel satisfied and will not try to spoil your life later.
  • Use resentment.If it so happened that your admirer offended you - let it be the reason for the gap. In this case, you can call him on the phone, saying about parting or even just disappear without explaining anything. If he is a worthy person, then, most likely, a feeling of guilt in front of you will keep him at a distance. If you feel that he can take revenge and pursue you, this is not the best option for parting.
If he doesn't want to part
If he doesn't want to part
  • Cold.Show your passion that you have cooled to it - stop making meetings yourself, agree on them less often than before, behave colder and less interestedly. During the dates, answer the calls of other people, communicate with the relatives and help them solve problems on the phone. When you cancel the date - call the reason for the lesson, courses and hobbies, urgent everyday business, joint time with relatives. Pretend to have forgotten to answer the call or SMS. With such behavior you will push him to the idea that you have something to do without it, and he will gradually wean.
  • Turn on the "wife".Give him quarrels about and without, put the requirements for him that he cannot fulfill. Become a headache for him. Let him clearly understand that you are not that beautiful, tender and always desirable, which he needs, and with which he will be happy.
  • Do not continue the relationship due to blackmail.If, after parting, the extractor threatens you and says that he will tell the husband - there is no need to give in to threats. Thus, you will show weakness, and the relations of compulsion will not bring you joy, and the prohibited connection will still be revealed sooner or later. If he is married, just threaten him with a disclosure in front of his wife. If not, unfortunately, you need to be prepared for the fact that a hassle awaits you. But it is not a fact that he will decide on acquaintance with your faithful.

How to finally part with a loved one?

This is probably the strongest shock in the life of any representative of the fair sex. Such an event is difficult to transfer, preserving self -esteem and live calmly, even if you yourself have become the initiator of farewell.

The reasons for separation can be different - different goals in life, difficulties in relationships, treason. If the couple are intelligent, then they will do everything to make the parting calmly and beautifully. After him, they will not even be happy, they will disperse in different directions in search of their true happiness.

If you have made a decision

If you notice that meetings with the beloved are becoming less often, it has become very busy, inattentive to your holidays, successes and stories - this may be a sign that your beloved heart has cooled for you. Of course, you can live in fear and every day wait for him to leave. And you can maintain self -esteem and take a step to separation yourself, so that later you do not feel abandoned and get out of the situation without prejudice to your own self -esteem.

Of course, in this case, your partner will try to return you so as not to feel the bitterness of the defeat. If your goal is to love and be loved, and you want to feel real feelings and build a family, stand on your decision and try to ensure that parting with a man is as beautiful as possible and does not leave scars either in your heart. Let the beautiful kind and pure memories remain in the shower.

Your decision
Your decision
  • Take the emotions under control. At the meeting, discuss with your beloved the experiences that are caused by your relationships. Do not break, do not increase your tone and try to speak calmly. If possible, go around the moments that could hurt his pride and do not get carried away with good joint memories.
  • Do not succumb to persuasion. If you make a decision, so that your man does not make, even if he is weak and will try to cause pity in you, be firm in your decision. Do not give way, even if you will be reproached and accused of that you are stale and heartless.
  • Tell me everything. Think in advance everything you would like to say. Do not leave unprofitable and unspoken thoughts, emotions and experiences. Let this part with this parting will begin a new life in which everything will be from scratch. If you do not have enough strength to tell everything during a date - call or write a letter and say everything you feel. Clearly formulate the words that mean the end of your relationship.
  • Do not go to the final date.If your beloved offers you a last date, in no case do not agree and do not initiate this yourself. Farewell touches and kisses can change your solution or make the gap process even more painfully. It is better not to touch the wounds that have not yet begun to drag on.
Parting
Parting

The main thing in parting is to try to keep the whole situation under your control, so that it is easier as possible to transfer a difficult life situation.

If the parting was initiated by a lover

This situation is very difficult to survive and come to terms with this fact. In addition to tips on how to break the relationship, we have prepared for you some advice of psychologists on how to survive the parting and configure ourselves on the final parting with a man.

  • Do not look for the reason within yourself. To avoid similar situations in the future - look at everything from the side later. Now the best option is to just do self -improvement. Find a new hobby, sit on a fashionable diet, change your style, go to meetings to your friends, enjoy life. Take care of your career, deeds, home. Go to the sports section. The successes you achieve will make you more confident and more attractive to the male. When it passes for some time, if you want, you can try to look for the reasons for your gap in yourself.
  • Look for flaws in your former lover. This will help you alleviate the mental wound. Understand that he is not the perfect man that you drew to yourself. Take a clean piece of paper, divide it into two columns. In one, write down its advantages, and in the other - disadvantages. These two columns will help you look more soberly at your beloved.
  • Give yourself time. Install a certain period to cry and suffer. Let it be a specific period - for example, a week or two. Such an installation will help you avoid protracted depression and pull yourself together. At the end of this period, remove from the eyes of his photos, gifts, and other things that you can remind you of him.
Give me time
Give me time
  • Tell us about your misfortune. Of course, you should not go outside or be sure to friends and tell them everything. But, if you can, share with your mother or best girlfriend. If you do not have such a trusting relationship with someone, trust the mirror or diary. Thus, you will get rid of the load of obsessive thoughts and sad memories. Write out the experiences in the diary along with the awareness of the situation that you have experienced recommend by many psychologists. You can also write everything on a leaf and symbolically burn it.
  • Shout. If you are very bad, you need to release emotions. Go to where you will not be heard and shout with all your might. Scream until you feel relief or just that your sadness has weakened.
  • Arrange the holidays. Create your holidays - little meetings with friends, buying a new book or thing, go to a concert, take your parents on a picnic in nature. In any case, remember that everything that is not done is all for the better.

Farewell to a man who loves you: how to part completely?

It is very difficult finally part with a manwho still experiences warm feelings for you. Moreover, if your feelings have cooled for a long time, relationships become a burden. But to throw a person, thereby offending him - I do not want to.

Psychologists in such cases advise will nevertheless decide to part. After all, such relationships bring pain and discomfort not only to you, but also to a man who loves you. After parting, you will find peace, and your life is new colors.

Below are the recommendations of psychologists about how finally part with a manth, to break the tedious connection, without destroying the further life of a man and his own.

Parting
Parting
  • Neutral place. You should not choose places that are important to you and can cause nostalgia and gentle memories to talk about parting. Let it be a neutral place with which nothing is connected with you. Cafe, park or other crowded place in which you have never been perfect before.
  • Be tactful. Consider the fact that your feelings have already cooled down, but your partner’s feelings are not. Therefore, explain everything to him without humiliating him. Take all the blame on yourself - say that the reason is in you. Tell us that you cannot reciprocate him. Do not give examples from life that a man can accept to his address. Do not console him with gentle words or gestures - and he can perceive this as a chance to restore relations. In the conversation, it is necessary to show humanity and hardness.
  • Rehearsal. Before the conversation, rehearse in front of the mirror. Mentally imagine a partner and tell him everything you want to say. This will make you more confident and decisive in the conversation.
  • Possible reaction. Prepare yourself for the possible reaction of your partner to parting. Try to stay calm in any situation. If your partner loves himself very much and does not want to lose you, considering his property, be prepared for the fact that he will violently respond to your words and desire to break the relationship. He will try to keep you in any way. If you realize that your partner is a person with a weak character, be prepared for the fact that he will try to cause pity in you. He may tell you that he will not be able to live without you and can even threaten to end life.
  • Friendship is prohibited. A man who loves you never offer to remain friends. You risk in this way to stretch parting for months and even years. In addition, a loving person will try to return you again and again and all this will be very painful for both of you.
  • Do not continue communication. Ignore his attempts to resume communication after parting. Do not answer calls or SMS and delete it from friends.
The final gap
The final gap

How and with whom your relationship is developed - it is very important to have the power to save your own dignity and break the relationship in time. Do not stretch or reanimate relationships in which there is no prospect. Appreciate yourself, your time and your life - it is given to us for happiness and, if not so, this is an occasion to think. Decide on changes in life, ruin the finally outliving relationships and be happy.

Video: How to part with a man?



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