How to understand what they lie to you: signs of a person’s lies in a conversation, communication. How to recognize the lies of women and men by facial expressions, gestures, eyes: the theory of lies. How to recognize a lie in correspondence, text messages, by phone: 10 liar errors and 15 ways to recognize a lie

Deception and lies have become part of everyday life. Lies can be harmless, or can carry a serious threat. This article will help you learn to recognize liars by various signs.

Each modern person needs to be able to recognize lies. To do this, it is necessary to learn several tricks and remember the basic manifestations of lies in facial expressions, gestures.

How to recognize the lies of women and men when talking on facial expressions, gestures, eyes: Lie theory

First of all, the lie manifests itself in the facial facial expressions.

In order to recognize the liar carefully look at your interlocutor. If you see the following signs in his facial expressions, then he is most likely a liar.

• Asymmetry. This sign can manifest itself in different ways. Firstly, one side of the interlocutor’s face can express any emotion stronger. That is, the muscles will be more tense on the face on the right or left.
• Time. If during the conversation the facial expression changes after 5 seconds, then this is pretense. Scientists have established that usually a change in facial expressions occurs on average after 10 seconds. However, if your interlocutor experiences rage, delight or depression, then his facial expression changes really quickly.
• Not correspondence of emotion and words. If your interlocutor in words expressed any emotion, but his face is still calm, then he most likely deceived you. The same is with a belated expression of emotion. For example, if a person says how sad he is, but sadness on his face appears with delay, then he wants to mislead you. Sincerity is manifested in the synchronism of words and emotions.
• Smile. A smile can also often appear on the face of the interlocutor when he deceives you. There are two reasons for this. A person is used to using a smile to relieve tension. This is a kind of instinct that appears in childhood and preserved until adulthood. And since when a person deceives, he experiences stress, a smile helps him relieve tension. Another reason why liars often smile in another. Joy helps to hide their real emotions.

However, trying to determine the liar by a smile, be careful. Scientists have found that during the conversation, liars and ordinary people smile at the same frequency. Only now their smiles are different. The liar smile can be called "stretched." It looks tense and her lips are slightly stretched, slightly exposing her teeth.

Also, lies can be easily noticed by the speaker's eyes.

If the interlocutor is honest with you, he will look into your eyes most of the time. However, the liar will prefer by any means to avoid visual contact. But be careful, an experienced liar, on the contrary, will try to look at you as often as possible when talking. If an honest person can look away a couple of times when he remembers or represents something, an experienced liar in these cases will still look into the eyes.

Simply put, with a normal conversation, views are found about 2/3 times in the whole conversation, while when talking with an inexperienced liar, the eyes will meet a maximum of 1/3 times for the whole conversation. When the conversation will return to the fact that the liar is trying to hide, his gaze will immediately rush to the side. Thus, the liar will try to focus on inventing the most plausible answer.

Pay attention to the pupils of the interlocutor. If they expand, then he is lying. Also, the eyes of the liar shine. All this comes from the stress he experienced.
It is interesting that men usually look down, and women - liars on the contrary - up.

Observation of gestures is a great way to recognize a liar. These are the gestures and their features are signs of lies:

• STERY. The gestures of the interlocutor are awkward, stingy. He moves and gestures little. This does not apply to modest people who are always characteristic of such behavior.
• Hanging. The liar will often be nervous and because of this, he will often involuntarily touch the nose, throat, area around the mouth, and also feel behind his ear.

• Nervousness. The liar often bites his lips, tries to distract from the conversation and smoke. Its gestures will also be very nervous, the gestures will turn out to be sharp.

• Arms. If a person constantly brings his hands to his face, as if trying to close from you, this is a sure sign of what they lie to you.

• Hand -covered. The liar involuntarily seeks to cover his mouth with his hand, sometimes clutching the thumb to the cheek. Sometimes it is accompanied by coughing. A person seems to try to squeeze his mouth in time so as not to talk. And the cough is designed to distract you from the topic of conversation. After all, if you are polite, you can ask if the interlocutor is healthy. And thereby distract from the real topic of the conversation.

• Touching the nose. This gesture may be a continuation of the previous one. The thing is that the liar, catching himself on the fact that his hand reaches for his mouth, tries to improve and pretend that his nose was simply combed out.

• Covering the ear. Some liars are trying to shut themselves subconsciously from their own lies. At such moments, the hand is located next to the ear or even closes it.

• Through the teeth. Sometimes, in order not to talk, the liar subconsciously clenches his teeth during conversation. But it can also be a common signal of discontent. Before you decide that this is a gesture of lies, think about what situation the interlocutor is in.

• Touching the eyes. In men and women, this gesture is slightly different. The woman seems to try to correct the makeup, running a finger under the eye. And men just rub the eyelid. This is another way to avoid visual contact. But this gesture also has two values. The first, as already known, is a lie. And the second is fatigue from the conversation and the desire to show the interlocutor how tired of looking at him.

• Hanging the neck. This gesture most often looks like this: a person begins to run with his hand along the side surface of the neck or to feel the earlobe. Most often, this gesture is repeated repeatedly and the number of repetitions reaches 5 times. This gesture demonstrates the doubts of the liar. For example, you told a person something, and he replied: “Yes, I understand” or “I agree,” and at the same time scratched his ear or neck. This shows that in fact he doubts your words or simply did not understand you.

• « Something became stuffy ". When a person is lying, he is worried and sweat a lot. Because of this, it sometimes becomes hot to him, and he begins to delay the collar of shirts or jackets, as people do in severe heat. With this gesture, he tries to distract from the conversation of his concern. But be careful if your interlocutor is angry or upset, with this gesture he can try to come to his senses, cool down. How to understand in what condition is your interlocutor, he simply restrains emotions or lies? The most sure way is to ask him to ask him. At the same time, the liar will most likely be stuck and shut up for some time, trying to understand whether you have bitten it off or not. And an excited or angry person will immediately repeat what has been said, while his voice will tremble or facial expressions will show his feelings.

• Baby gesture. Often, liars subconsciously put their fingers in the mouth. So they are trying to get rid of guilt and get to the time when everyone took care of and took care of them. So the liar is looking for help and forgiveness. It is as if he is trying to say: "Yes, I am lying, but I'm so harmless and I am ashamed, so do not be angry, please."

How a person behaves when he lies: psychology

Watching the interlocutor, pay attention to the left half of his body. The reason is that it is the left side of the body that is responsible for emotions. So if you want to understand the truth whether a person says, take a look at his left hand, half of his face or leg. Our brain most controls the right side of the body. And the left is often not amenable to our control. The fact is that even if a lie is invented in advance, a person thinks the most about his words, and not about emotions and gestures. Therefore, the left side, most related to emotions, can give out his real feelings and intentions.

For example, if the liar is nervous, its left leg or hand will spit involuntarily back and forth. The left hand will make strange circular gestures, and the left leg may begin to draw obscure signs on the asphalt or floor.

Researchers found that each hemisphere of the body controls its half of the body. The right hemisphere is responsible for emotions, feelings and imagination. And the left - for intelligence and speech. Nature arranged so that each hemisphere controls the "opposite" part of the body. That is, the left hemisphere controls the right of the body, and the left, on the contrary, the right one.

That is why it turns out that the right side of the body is more aware of the more conscious control. This is the cause of one of the main signs of a liar - asymmetry, when the right side of the body tries to remain calm or express the “correct” emotion, and the left side of the body contradicts this.

How to recognize a lie in correspondence, text messages, by phone?

During the correspondence, it is especially easy to hide the truth, because we cannot hear the voice of the interlocutor or see his face. Most often, people lie about their plans. The situations are especially frequent when someone promises that it will be “in 5 minutes”, and at the same time late for half an hour. In addition to such situations, according to studies, only 11 percent of the messages contain deception and only 5 people out of all 164 subjects turned out to be real liars, and half of their correspondence was deceit. So to meet the inveterate liar in the social. networks are not easy. Here are a few signs that will help to identify such a person, or simply calculate that your interlocutor is not saying something.

• Using the words "that woman" or "that man". Speaking about the com- Thus, the interlocutor is trying to hide the fact of intimacy or to intentionally reduce the significance of this person in his life.

• If the interlocutor told you about many unusual events in his lifeAnd you doubt their truthfulness, do the following. After some time, ask a person to tell about the same incidents, but in the reverse order. For example, your friend, by correspondence, told you a long story about how he went to visit his uncle-millionaire. After a couple of days, ask him: “Sorry, remember you talked about your uncle? So how did it end there? Big party? And what happened before? I forgot something ... " This is a comic example. But the method works. After all, a liar, after some time, will forget at some time and will surely confuse something.

• Too many little things. If a person talks about some old event in numerous details, then most likely he wants to deceive you. Agree, we sometimes do not remember in detail what we did yesterday. And if a person remembers almost every minute of some last year, then something is clearly wrong. Most often, a liar uses an overly detailed story about something to create the illusion of the plausibility of the told.
• Semi -truth. Sometimes people talk about their lives only partially. If this is a man, he can only talk about the positive aspects of his life in order to impress you.

• Excuses and illegible speech. In this case, the liar does not give a direct answer or begins to answer using vague or abstract expressions. Also, the words “possibly”, “somehow”, “see”, “time will tell” are used for excuses. This situation often arises when one of the interlocutors in social. Network gives another advice. And this person does not want to follow the advice, but in order not to offend the interlocutor, he gives a vague promises in which the words above are present.

10 liar errors

Even an experienced liar can make a mistake and show the mismatch of his words and thoughts. Usually we do not pay attention to such small oddities in behavior. But it is they who are non -true signals. Here are the 10 most common mistakes of liars.

• The emotion on the face disappears and appears suddenly and sharply. A person, as if “turns on” a certain expression on his face, and then just as suddenly “turns off” it. You can train a certain expression on the face, even learn to pretend to be sad or joyful quite realistic. But what liars most often forget about is about the time during which emotion should usually be on the face. With the rare exception, emotion, if it has already appeared, suddenly, in a couple of seconds, cannot disappear. Also, even if the liar knows about it, it is unlikely that at the right time he will be able to simultaneously select words and make the right expression on his face, and keep this expression the right amount of time. Most likely, the first two aspects of the liar will pay more attention, and he simply will not have the strength to the last.
• The contradiction of words and facial expressions. The man said: “I like it,” but when pronouncing these words, his face was indifferent? So the lie is obvious. Even if a person then smiles, this will not add to his words sincerity. Only if emotions and words are simultaneously, they are true.

• Contradiction of gestures and words. The same rule concerns the moments when one thing is said, and the body language speaks the other. For example, if someone says: “Yes, I'm very happy,” and at the same time his hands are crossed on his chest, and his back is crushed, then he is definitely lying. With the manifestation of joy, only the mouth smiles. Usually a sincere smile consists not only of stretched lips, but also from the expression of the eyes. If a person smiles only with his mouth, but his eyes are not narrowed, then this smile is simply insincere.

• Attempts to fence off. During the conversation, a person involuntarily tries to place any objects between you. It can be a book, a cup, or hands laid on the table. Thus, the liar creates an additional distance between you. Therefore, he becomes calmer, because He subconsciously thinks that the farther you are from him, the less you understand him.

• The pace of speech. Some liars are afraid that they will take them to clean water. For this reason, even starting the story slowly, they then speed up the pace of their speech in order to finish the story as soon as possible and get out of a stressful situation.
  Also, liars are characterized by pauses in speech. During such small and frequent pauses, they look at you, trying to understand whether they believe them or not

• Words - repentance. If a person is suddenly asked that he wants to hide, then he will most likely repeat your question at first, and then he will begin to answer. Thus, he will give himself time to gather his thoughts and come up with a more or less believable answer. Here is an example of such a repetition. “What did you do last night” - “Last night I ...” or even “Do you ask what I did last night? Well, I…"

• Excessive brevity or detail. If a liar wants to deceive you, then he can fall into two extremes. The first of them is a detailed story with many unnecessary details. If a woman-Claim tells you about the evening at which she allegedly was last week, then it can even “recall” the colors and styles of all dresses in women gathered for the holiday. And the second extreme is excessive conciseness. A liar sometimes gives a brief and foggy answer, the truth of which is difficult to verify due to a lack of information. True, some liars combine both of these extremes. To begin with, they give you a brief and abstract answer to the question and check your reaction. If you express distrust, then they are accepted to fall asleep you with a bunch of unnecessary and meaningless details.

• The best defense is an attack. Some liars, if you express doubts about their words, will immediately rush at you on the attack. They will begin to ask such questions in an aggressive manner: “Who are you taking me for? Do you doubt me? I thought we were friends / you love me ... ”, etc. Thus, liars translate the conversation to another topic and make you make excuses. Such aggressive protection against a liar can follow after a simple question that he simply does not want to answer. One more example. "Daughter, where were you last night while I was working?" - “Mom, I'm already 17, and you control me! I'm tired, you don’t trust me at all! ”

• Attention to your behavior. The liar will constantly monitor your face and tone of voice. The slightest sign of discontent or distrust will be a signal for him to change the strategy. Seeing how you frowning your eyebrows, listening to his story, the liar will immediately begin to make excuses or move on to aggressive protection. If a person is telling the truth, then most likely he will be so passionate about his history that he will not immediately notice your emotions.

15 ways to recognize a lie

• Follow the emotions and gestures of the interlocutor. From the very first days of acquaintance, try to carefully look at how a person shows joy, boredom or sadness. Thus, you will find out what behavior is typical for a specific personality. And strong deviations from this norm, most likely, will be the signals of lies.

• Pay attention to the timbre of the voice. With a lie, it will most likely become either too high or slow, or vice versa accelerate.
• Look into the eyes. If the interlocutor, usually not particularly shy, will begin to look away, then he is unlikely to tell the truth.

• Be careful to the lips of a person. The liars often have an inappropriate smile, or from the relief that you believed them, or in order to relieve stress. Of course, this does not apply to people who are accustomed often to smile just because of their cheerfulness.

• Check if there is an interlocutor who answers an important question, “a stone facial expression”. If an unemotionalism is not characterized by a person, then the sudden disappearance of all feelings from his face should alert. Most likely the interlocutor is afraid to give himself out. Therefore, he simply suppresses all his emotions with an effort of will.

• Check if the interlocutor appears "muscle micronics". This is a slight tension of the face, which appears for a couple of seconds, too, a sign of lies.

• Pay attention to whether a person blushes or turns pale. The complexion cannot be controlled. He is a sign of excitement. And if a person is telling the truth, then why should he worry?

• Notice whether a person’s lips tremble. If so, but there are no obvious reasons for excitement, then it is lying.

• Look at whether your interlocutor is often blinking. This is also a sign of excessive excitement. If such a sign appears when answering a neutral question, then a person most likely worries because he is lying.

• Take a look at the pupils of the interlocutor. Some psychologists believe that expanding pupils are in a person when he speaks a lie.

• Learn the gestures that are most often done by those who say a lie: A person rubs his eyes, covers his mouth, scratches his nose, touches his face with his hands, often pulls the collar of the shirt.

• Do not forget to compare the reactions of a person to find out when his behavior changes. Compare how a person behaves in similar situations to learn his habits. And when he does something that is unusual for him, carefully consider his words. They may have a lie.

• Be attentive to details. If a person begins to behave strangely and nervous for no reason, more closely evaluate his behavior.

• Pay attention to the left side of the body. It is associated with human emotions, and it is more difficult to control it. Therefore, if the right side of the body “contradicts” the left, then the probability that the interlocutor is hiding something.

• Do not make hasty conclusions and are in no hurry to blame a person. Before that, watch him even more carefully, and it is best if you draw conclusions, maintaining the sobriety of the mind.

The ability to distinguish the truth from lies is the skill necessary for every modern person. This ability will be easier to acquire if you often communicate with different people and at the same time will be attentive to the interlocutors. Then the ability to analyze facial expressions and gestures will appear in you.

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